


The Harper Series

by PattRose



Series: The Harper Series [1]
Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst and Humor, M/M, Sappy Ending, Silly, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-17
Updated: 2013-07-24
Packaged: 2017-12-20 11:25:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 81,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/886695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blair has to defend Jim's honor. (What do you mean, what honor?) Silliness, love and sex abound.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What Were You Thinking

Summary: Blair has to defend Jim's honor.  
What Were You Thinking? 

Summary: Blair has to defend Jim's honor. (What do you mean, what honor?) Silliness, love and sex abound. 

Acknowledgments: Thank you Mary for the wonderful beta job. Thank you Sam for the fantastic cover. I loved it.

[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/pattthinking_zps2aa999fd.jpg.html)

What Were You Thinking?  
Patt

 

Jim, Rafe, Brown and Connor walked into the station and one of the cops said, "Wow, you missed all of the fun, Detectives."

"What are you talking about?" Rafe asked, but not really stopping. 

"Detective Sandburg took on four guys in the locker room." The cop beamed with pride on Blair's part. 

Jim and the others took off for the stairs. Jim was scared to death of what he would find when he got there. They all stopped when they saw four men standing in Simon's office and Jim could hear Simon yelling at Blair and the men. 

"He's not a happy camper but he looks to be all right," Jim went over to his desk hoping to get a better view. 

Megan sat on the corner and whispered, "Have you seen his face yet?"

Alarmed, Jim looked at her and asked, "Why? Why wouldn't his face be all right?"

Jim could hear Simon bellowing at all of the men but he was really yelling at Sandburg. Finally, Jim decided to go into Simon's office and help. He knocked on the door and opened it. 

"Excuse me, Detective, did you hear me say come in?"

"No, sir, but I was thinking I might be able to help somehow," Jim looked at him hoping that Simon could tell him that Blair was all right. 

"Get out, Ellison. Your partner can tell you all about it later. Now..." Simon shoved Jim out and slammed the door shut. 

"So how does he look?" Brown asked Jim as he walked by. 

"How the fuck would I know? Simon threw me out. Isn't there someone here that saw him?" Jim asked almost desperately. 

"Well, how did the other guys look?" Rafe wondered aloud. 

"I couldn't see them, either. They turned their heads also. I want to know what the hell happened down there," Jim led his merry band on a trip down to the locker room. They all just stood and watched as Jim looked like he was smelling the air. He turned to them and said, "Sandburg is bleeding and so are the others. But Blair is bleeding more than the other men."

"Let's find someone that can tell us what happened," Rafe led the way and they asked anyone and everyone they came in contact with. Finally, they struck pay dirt. 

"Detective Rafe, I saw it, yes. I didn't stop him because he threatened me," the rookie cop said quietly. 

Jim said gently, "Can you give me the officer's name?"

Rookie Minter said, "Well, of course I can, Detective Ellison. It was Detective Sandburg."

"Minter, you're telling me that Sandburg threatened you?" Jim asked incredulously. "Tell me exactly what it was he said."

"Yes, it was Sandburg. I know him. I was going to help him get away from them, but he told me that if I touched him, he would make me pay for the rest of my life." The young man stood there not knowing what to do next. 

"When Detective Sandburg said this, was he on top of the fight? Was he in control?" Rafe finally asked. 

"No, sir, he was being held down," Minter still looked lost and sad. 

"So you're telling us that four men, held him down and when he said to get away you took this as a threat?" It was Joel's turn for shock. 

"I know now that he was probably trying to save my butt, but at the time, he really screamed at me. I didn't know what to do about it," Minter looked so sad that even Jim felt bad for him. 

We need you upstairs Minter. Captain Banks needs to see you," Jim helped lead the kid up the stairs. "Do you know if anyone else saw it?"

Jim heard the spike in the heartbeat and knew he was onto something. "Who saw it, Minter?" 

"There were four guys in the shower when this took place. I can't tell you about that, but they can," the young man hoped that would be enough. 

Brown took his notebook out and said, "What are their names? I'll go and start questioning."

Minter gave all of the names of the four men that witnessed whatever it was that made his heart spike. 

Joel said, "Jim, you go with them, I'll take Minter here up to see Captain Banks."

"Thanks, Joel," Jim said catching up with Rafe and Brown. 

"How much you want to make a bet that they were after him cuz they think he's a fag," Rafe said off handedly. 

Brown looked over at Jim nervously and said, "Jim, are you mad?"

"Not at you two. They probably did think he looked like a fag. It's part of life, you know? The long hair and the nice looks. But I hope he put that to rest by fighting back," Jim turned into a squad room of Robbery and said, "Is there a Lieutenant Harper here?"

"Yeah, I'm Harper, Ellison. What's the problem?" The cop glared at Ellison as he stood up and they all got a look at the huge man. _He must be 6' 8" and he didn't think he could help?_

"Why don't you come out to the hallway with us and we'll tell you what we need to know," Jim led the way out of the room. Jim didn't know why, but he could tell Harper hated him. This was getting weirder by the moment. 

"Harper, we need to ask you some questions about what happened in the locker room earlier," Jim opened up his notebook and pulled out a pen. 

"What the fuck do you want to know? They said some shit, your partner defended your so-called honor and that's it," Harper leaned into the wall and dared Jim to even push him. 

"Defend my honor?" Jim just stood there in shock. 

"What do you expect? Sandburg probably didn't know it was going to be like this, but he has to defend your honor all the time," 

"What in the fuck are you talking about?" Jim almost yelled. 

"Okay, let me spell it out for you. They were telling him what type of fag you were and he defended your honor," Harper once again dared Jim on with a look. 

"Listen, you fucker, don't think your size will scare me," Jim started for him but Rafe and Brown stopped him. 

"Why would anyone think that about Ellison?" Rafe asked Harper. 

"He hangs out at gay bars, boys. He's not too discreet," Harper started to leave but Brown touched his arm and said, "We still need you to fill out a report. So come up to Major Crime today."

After he walked in Rafe turned to Jim and said, "Ellison, is this true?"

"Fuck... Fuck... Fuck..." Jim started for the stairs. 

Brown stopped him and said, "Is it true?"

"Yeah, it's true. But Blair doesn't know. I've never brought it to work. But he'll move out now," Jim pulled away from Brown and started back up stairs. 

Walking into Major Crime, Joel grabbed Jim's arm. "Jim, I could use some help on a few things. Follow me," Joel led the way into his office and when Jim sat down Joel shut the door. 

"Before you even get started Joel, yes, I'm gay. I was always pretty cautious but I guess not enough. So if you want to yell at me, go ahead, but I'm going to get out there to hear what's happening," Jim never raised his head the whole time he spoke. 

"Well, that's all really fascinating but I pulled you in here to set up dates for the training program for self-defense. I'm glad you shared that with me, though," Joel was smiling at his large friend hoping that he would calm down. "Want to tell me what it is you want to listen to?"

Jim filled him in on what was going on and how he was worried about Blair. 

"How about I go into Simon's office to see if I can help and that way I can tell you how he is?" Joel stood up to leave without waiting for an answer. 

"Thank you, Joel. I'm worried, is all," Jim started to follow him. 

"No, you stay here. If Simon catches you in the bullpen, he won't even let me in there. Now sit and have some coffee. I'll be right back," Joel made his way down the hallway, wondering what he could do to help any of this. 

Outside Simon's office Joel could hear Blair yelling at someone and it made him smile. The large Detective knocked on Simon's door and opened it, "Simon?"

"Come on in, Joel. I could use some help in writing these papers up. We've got four men here saying that Sandburg started everything and it was all over nothing. Can you imagine that?" Simon was still writing out one of the reports when Joel came over and grabbed it from him. 

"Might be a little too soon to fill out reports. We have witnesses and they're filing their reports right now with Brown and Rafe," Joel glared at the four men. He still couldn't see Blair. 

"Sir, we don't need any witness reports. I take the blame for everything. So let's drop all of this," Sandburg had finally moved away from the window and stood in front of Simon's desk. 

"I still don't have any reason. I need a reason, Sandburg," Simon dared him to even try to lie to him. 

"Fine, sir, it's because they didn't like a fag working with them. I took offense to them saying that to me," Blair stood straighter as he said it. 

Joel walked over to Simon's desk and turned Blair towards him and saw the bruises, the scrapes, and the two black eyes. Sighing, he finally said, "So you sure showed them, didn't you, Sandburg?"

"Yes, I sure did. They know that even fags fight back," Blair turned back to Simon and finished, "so can I go now, sir?"

Joel looked at Simon and Banks motioned to Joel to follow Sandburg. 

"Blair, wait up. Come here," Joel led him into the restroom and he started to clean his face and hands up before he took him to see Jim. 

"I can clean my own face, Joel. Geeze," Blair washed all of the blood off of his hands and face and dried them off. 

"Blair, Jim knows what happened. He knows that you were defending his honor," Joel tried to warn Blair, so he wouldn't lie to Ellison. 

"Oh great. Now he knows that people think he's a fag," Blair rubbed his sweaty palms against his jeans. 

Joel pulled Blair aside and said, "Blair, he's gay."

"I know that, Joel. Do I look stupid? He's not gay; he's bi. He plays both sides," Blair brushed his hair back as they made their way to Joel's office. 

Joel opened the door and Jim stood up and Blair said, "You should see the other guys, man."

Everyone in Joel's office had their mouth hanging open. Jim moved towards him and pulled him into a loose hug and said, "Chief, all joking aside, I'm going to kill those fuckers."

"You are not going to kill those fuckers. They're going to get suspended, as well as me. Now let it go, Jim. I mean it," Blair pulled away from Jim and saw the hurt look on Jim's face. "Jim, it hurts to be held right now, okay, man?"

"Sure," Jim went and sat down and everyone saw the walls come up. Just as quickly he walked out and stormed off down the hallway. 

"Well hell, I'm fine, I'll just go running after him," Blair tried catching up until he realized that Jim was heading to Simon's office. 

Jim didn't even knock. He stormed the office and said, "So who wants to see how tough the fag is? I'll take you on."

"Jim, this is a private meeting, it's not about your partner," Simon started leading Jim towards the door. 

"Oh that's rich. They all told you it was about them saying something about Blair? I can't believe it. They were talking about me, Simon. I'll wait and talk to them in the hall," Jim walked out of his office and took up post at the elevator doors. 

"Tell me, was it your intention to piss Ellison off? Or were you trying for something else?" Simon glared at the men in front of him. 

No one said a word and finally Simon said, "You're all suspended without pay for three days. You have to come and see me before you start back."

They all got up and left the room. And Simon followed them to the elevator and said, "Ellison, there will be no nonsense on this floor. Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir," Ellison pushed the button for the idiots. 

When it opened they filed on and just as it was about close Jim jumped in. "Fuck," Simon started running for the stairs, grabbing his men on the way.

When Simon got downstairs, the elevator still wasn't there. Jim was up to no good, Simon just knew it. 

"Is this damn thing even moving?" Simon asked Joel. 

"I would say he's got it on emergency stop sir," Joel tried not to upset Simon, but it was going to be hard to get around there. 

Inside the elevator were four very frightened men. Jim pushed the stop button and called them by name, "Cason, Franklin, Jensen and Nance, do I have your attention?"

All four men shook their heads in the affirmative. "Good, glad to see you're seeing things my way. Now who wants to start? I want to know why Sandburg felt the need to defend my honor," Jim leaned against the wall like this was something he did daily. 

"Fine, you want to know?" Cason stepped forward, the largest of the four, "we told him we didn't see how he could work with a bottom boy."

Jim just stayed in the same position and kept his arms folded across his chest. 

"Cason's serious, that's what started it," Franklin began to get a little nervous about being here with Ellison. 

"I can't believe that he just jumped you four men, for that reason alone, so we'll just stay here until you tell me what else was said," Jim smiled at all four of them evilly. 

"Okay, he's going to find out anyway, when Sandburg tells him tonight in bed," Jensen was beginning to sweat, "he said that we had the story wrong."

"He did, did he?" Jim challenged them. 

"Yeah, he said that he was the bottom. Well, we didn't even know you were sleeping together. He said you were a fucking good top," Nance stood right up to Ellison when he said this. 

"Well, fuck me," Jim said very quietly. 

"Ellison, I can't do that," Nance replied. 

"Oh get a grip, Nance. No way would I let you fuck me. Remember, I'm a top," Jim smiled and moved towards them and they all moved back. 

"Ellison, we did what you wanted. You know now, let us out of here," Cason pleaded. 

"I'll let you out of here if you make a promise," Ellison just stood there waiting for them to ask the question. 

"What?" Franklin asked. 

"You'll never touch Sandburg again or anyone else that you think might be gay. That is their choice. If you do harm anyone, I'll come after you all, one at a time," Ellison reached over and pushed the button and the car began to move once again. 

When they got down to the first floor, Jim heard all of them whisper, "Thank god."

As they started out, Jim draped his arm across two men, on either side. "It was great being stuck in there with you guys. Call me soon," Ellison walked towards Simon, Joel, Connor and Blair. 

"Hey, what are you all doing down here?" Ellison looked at Simon to see how much trouble he was in. 

"Cason, are you and the others all right?" Simon asked. 

"We're fine, sir. See you tomorrow," Cason walked out the front door. 

"All right, Ellison, what did you do? Did you threaten them? Please tell me you didn't hit them where we couldn't see it," Simon was pushing Jim back further each time he poked him in the chest. 

"Sir, I swear to you I didn't touch them. All I told them was we needed to let people live their lives as they saw fit. And they agreed. But there was no violence at all," Jim leaned into the wall and smiled. 

"No way, Ellison. You would never let them get away with hitting Sandy like that," Connor yelled over at him. 

"Yes, I would because he started it, didn't you, Blair?"

"I started it, yes. Big deal. Now can I go home, Simon?" Blair walked towards the front door. 

"Want to hear why he was defending my honor, Simon?" Jim asked smiling. 

"No, he doesn't want to hear. Simon, its gay stuff. You don't want to fucking know," Blair was still trying to get out the door. 

"So tell us Blair, what did they say that provoked you so?" Joel asked pulling him away from the doorway. 

"Well, shit! Ellison, you're in deep trouble, man. They said Jim was a bottom boy and I took offense to that," Blair tried to get out of Joel's arms, but Joel was holding on tight. 

"Sandy, I think it's nice that you were defending his honor. Jim, I didn't know you were a bottom boy?" Connor really wanted to know this. 

"This is what I'm talking about. He's not a bottom boy, and I take offense to that term. Because someone chooses to be on the bottom, doesn't make him a bottom boy," Blair was getting angry. 

"Sandburg, what would he be then, an underneath boy?" Simon asked and they all began to howl. 

"An alternate position boy?" Connor had to add it. 

"Well, I'm glad you all think this is so funny," Blair growled. 

"I'm not laughing, Chief. I agree with you. Why label yourself? It's too fucking fun being top and bottom," Jim began to smile again. 

"Sandy, what would happen if a bottom boy decided to ride the man on top?" Connor again asked like it was something she really wanted to know. 

"Maybe like a bronco rider or something," Joel really did try to keep a straight face, but it didn't work. 

"Jesus, this is more than I want to hear," Simon started walking out the door. "See you all tomorrow."

"Night, sir," Jim called out pulling Blair away from Joel. "We're going to get out of here, too."

"Wait, he didn't answer my question," Connor demanded as she followed them out the door. 

"Night, Joel," all three called out. 

Joel shook his head as he went back in to see what was going to happen inside. 

"Can I come over and talk to you, Sandy?"

"No, you can't, Connor, he's going to be talking to me," Jim pushed Blair into the truck and shut the door behind him. "Talk to you later."

"Fine, I'll talk to him tomorrow then, you big ole grouch. Sandy, call me if you need an ear," Connor called out as Jim started the truck up. 

"Like I'd want one of hers, it wouldn't match my other one," Blair tried to make Jim smile and this worked. Jim laughed out loud. 

The rest of the ride was very quiet. Blair was afraid to say much and Jim wanted to wait until they were in the comfort of their own home. 

@@@@@

They walked through the door and Jim grabbed Blair from behind and turned him around. He brushed Blair's hair out of his face and looked him in the eyes. Jim had to be sure that he was reading the right message from what had transpired. What he saw in Blair's eyes was lust and love. Jim smiled and swooped in for their first kiss. Finally having to have some air, they pulled away from each other. 

"Jim?"

"Blair?"

"Well, now that fucking roll call is over, want to tell me what is going on?" Blair pulled Jim down for more kissing. 

"You want telling or kissing?" Jim said as he let himself be pulled into another kiss. 

"Jim, I couldn't have them think you were a lesser person because you were a bottom. I'm sorry I told them that," 

"I'm not sorry, Jesus. Are you missing this? We're fucking kissing. I hope to be fucking soon. And besides I am a top."

"So like I never get to be on top?"

"Oh yeah, Chief, you can be on top a lot. Just not tonight. I have to have you tonight."

"All right, I think I can make that work. You're on top tonight and I'll be top tomorrow. Does this work for you?" Blair kissed him again and took all thought away from Jim. 

"What were you saying?" Jim asked totally breathless. 

"I was saying, why don't we take this upstairs?" Blair pushed Jim up the stairs while mumbling, "Yeah, he's the top. Then why do I have to do all of the pushing?"

"Very funny, Chief." Jim started to undress Blair slowly. He wanted to take his time and make this special for both of them. Every time he took a piece of clothing off, the skin would be kissed by Jim. Blair was moaning already and they weren't naked yet.

Blair took his turn and started to undress Jim. He followed the same route and every time he took off some clothing, he would kiss Jim's skin. 

Finally, they were both standing there naked and very happy to see each other, when Jim said, "Fuck..."

"Already? I thought we would go slower," Blair said grumbling. 

"No, Chief. Connor's at the door."

"Well, fuck..." Blair got dressed quickly and said, "Stay up here. I'll get rid of her."

Blair opened the door as Connor was getting ready to knock and she said, "Weird, Sandy. I thought Jim was the only one that could do that. Are you going to ask me in or what?"

"Oh, sorry, Connor. Come on in," Blair stepped aside for her to enter. She and Blair both looked up as Jim came walking down the stairs in a robe. 

"Hey, Jimbo. I was hoping that I could ask you some questions about being gay," Connor went over to the sofa and sat down. 

"Connor, why do you care what Jim has to say about being gay?" Blair wondered aloud. 

"Jimbo, I really do want to find out about the difference between a top and a bottom," 

"Only if you stop calling me Jimbo. I hate that name," Jim smiled down at her as he moved toward the sofa, too. 

Blair knew that Jim was up to something, he just didn't know what. 

"First of all, we're more upfront. So if I want to fuck, I'm liable to end up naked and exposing myself," Jim opened up his robe and sure enough he was naked and Connor licked her lips. 

"That makes sense to me, Jim. What's next?" Connor was trying to stay calm, but she was getting turned on. 

"A top will walk right up to the person and stick it in their face. He's that sure of himself," Jim then walked over to Connor and she had a very erect cock in her face. 

Without thinking, she touched Jim. "Jim, I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from."

"You want me?" Jim asked. 

"Yes, I think I do," Connor's pulse was going up and her temperature was off the charts. 

"Then you'll have to ask Blair," 

A very confused Connor said, "Blair, why do I have to ask you?"

"Because we were in the middle of fucking and you came to the door," Blair laughed at the look on Connor's face. 

"It's all right, Connor. Want to join us?" Jim asked. 

Megan Connor ran out of the loft. Jim could hear her voice in the elevator, "I hate you, Ellison, and I will get even."

"Where in the hell did you come up with that shit you were telling her?" Blair started undressing as he watched Jim get hard. 

"Hey, it worked, who cares?" 

"Work some of that magic on me, Ellison," Blair moved his naked body over Jim's on the sofa until Jim said, "I don't fucking believe this."

"What? Someone's here?" Blair shot off the sofa like they could see him through the door. 

"Go get your robe on. It's Joel and Simon. I'll get rid of them quickly," Jim put his robe on as he talked to his cock telling it to settle down. 

Jim pulled the door open and scared both men. "God, we hate when you do that, Ellison." Simon entered the loft without being asked. Joel, on the other hand, could tell something was different. 

"You busy, Jim?" Joel asked and still didn't move into the loft. 

"A little, Joel, but come on in. What are you guys doing here?" Jim asked point blank. 

Before he could listen to what they were saying Jim heard Blair in his room. "I'm sorry, Jim, but I have to take some of this pressure off. I'll make it up to you later."

"Gentlemen, could you excuse me for just a moment?" Jim flew into Blair's room and shut the door. 

Jim pushed Blair back on his bed and asked him if he had any lube. Blair handed it to him smiling and Jim began to stretch him out. They kissed the whole time. He slid into Blair's tight channel and it was a perfect fit. Jim and Blair both were having a hard time keeping quiet. Jim was pounding into him fairly hard and Blair still was making some noise. 

Suddenly, Jim stopped and hung his head. "Simon, we'll be out in a second."

"Jim, is everything all right in there?" Simon really did sound concerned. 

Then Jim heard the door knob being turned. "Simon, if you don't want to see your two friends fucking, don't open that door. Please..."

"Oh shit..." Simon said and before long Jim heard the front door closing. 

"Well, that went well, Jim. What can we do for an encore?"

"I suggest we do something wild and wonderful like come," Jim started pounding into him harder and harder as he stroked Blair's cock. Blair exploded all over him and Jim both and Jim's orgasm was milked out of his by that tight, perfect fit. 

Jim cleaned both of them up and then they lay in Blair's bed just holding on to each other. 

"Chief, since when have you been bi?" Jim asked as he kissed the younger man's sweet skin. 

"Since forever, Jim. I really didn't think you'd want to know," Blair moved his neck so that Jim could get to it easier. 

"What were you thinking?" Jim pulled Blair closer and continued, "that goes for everything. Blair what were you thinking by taking on those guys? I don't need to worry about my reputation. Promise me you won't do it again," Jim kissed him softly. 

"No can do, hot shot," Blair was busy kissing Jim back, "I can't make promises I can't keep. I'm a big boy, I can fight my own battles, too."

"From now on we try and talk about it first?" Jim finally asked. 

"And about that stunt on the elevator, what were **you** thinking?"

"They hurt you, I had to do something, Chief," Jim sounded almost upset. 

"Okay, we'll talk about all this in the morning. Night, Jim," Blair kissed him long and hard. 

"Night, Blair. I love you," Jim started to get comfortable. 

"Do you go out of your way to make lover's cry the first night?" Blair was sniffing and Jim could smell the saline in the air. 

"Blair, what's wrong? Talk to me," Jim looked at his eyes and could see the tears ready to fall. "God, what did I do already?" Jim held on to Blair for dear life. 

"You didn't do anything wrong. No one's ever loved me, Jim. And you love me. I love you, too," Blair then kissed Jim until there was some returning interest in both of their cocks. 

All Jim could think about was the fact that he had been afraid to ask Blair to love him because he didn't want to lose him. He was afraid Blair would move out and hate him. _What in the hell were you thinking?_

@@@@@

The next morning both men knew that they would have to deal with more of the bullshit with the creeps. Thus was life. 

When they arrived at the bullpen, Rafe slapped Jim on the back and said, "Way to go, man."

"What are you talking about?" Jim asked totally confused. 

"We heard you got another notch in your belt last night," Rafe smiled at both men. 

"I most certainly did not. And if I did it's no one else's business. Who told you this?" Jim was getting angry just thinking about them being talked about. 

"Well all I'm saying is it's nice to hear that you're playing that side of the fence now," Rafe smacked him on the back again and moved on to talk with Brown. 

"Chief, do you get the feeling that we're in the Twilight Zone?" Jim sat at his desk, dumbfounded. 

"I know what they mean. Megan told them you and she slept together," Blair was quite proud of himself that he figured out Megan's joke. 

"But why would she do that? That's not getting even with anyone," 

"Because everyone knows you only sleep with guys. Now suddenly this woman tells them that she seduced you and the men will all think she's hot stuff for turning the gay guy on," Blair began to laugh at how smart Megan really was. 

"Fuck... I'm never going to live it down, am I?" Jim laid his face into both of his hands and just wished for the day to be over with. 

Simon walked by Jim's desk and said, "Ellison, my office."

"Yes sir," Jim answered and walked in and shut the door. 

"What's up, sir?"

"Oh don't what's up sir me. What the fuck is going on around here? Since when are you sleeping with Sandburg? Joel and I were very embarrassed by all of this," Simon lit up one of his smelly cigar's and waited for Jim's answers. 

Standing up Jim glared at Simon. "Well it's personal and no one asked you to come over and mess in our business. I'm sorry that you were embarrassed, but I don't really give a fuck." Jim stormed out of the office and went for the elevator. 

"Ellison, get your ass back in here," Simon called out and everyone in the office was watching what was going to happen. 

Jim leaned into the wall by the elevator and just stood there. He didn't want to go into Simon's office, but he also knew that he had to follow orders. Slowly he walked back and Simon slammed the door. 

"Don't you ever talk to me like that again. Understood?" Simon glared into Jim's eyes. 

"Oh yeah, understood it perfectly. I'm giving my notice Simon. You've got 30 days," Jim got up and walked out of Simon's office for the second time. 

"Ellison, get your ass back in here right now," Simon hollered out but Jim came back in quickly this time. 

"You seem awfully taken with my ass today Simon. What do you want?" Jim sat down hard on the chair and glared back at Simon. 

"I don't want your notice. I won't take it. I'm sorry Jim. I'm still just shocked about you and Sandburg and I took it out on you. I really am sorry," Simon puffed on his cigar and tried not to blow it in Jim's direction. 

"Fine... I'll stay then," Jim got up and walked out of the office. Jim knew that things would probably never be the same again. 

Simon opened his door and called Sandburg in. Blair looked at Jim nervously and Jim pushed him in that direction. As Blair walked in, he saw Jim going toward Joel's office. _Oh sure, he gets the nice guy._

"What's up, Simon?"

"Well I just wanted to tell you that I got a little crazed with Jim earlier, but we worked it out. And I'm going to try and be more understanding with you two," Simon went to light up his cigar. 

"Simon, please don't light that. It makes me and Jim both sick. I'm glad you're going to try and understand, but what did you say that got Jim so riled?"

"Something about Joel and I were embarrassed by what happened at the loft," Simon looked out the window hoping he wouldn't have another Detective slamming out of his office. 

"That's it? Why did he get so upset?" Blair looked down the hall and saw Jim coming out of Joel's office. Pulling the door open, Blair said, "Ellison, we need your help here."

"OH yeah, like I fucking believe that," Jim mumbled as he walked into Simon's office. 

"Jim, why would you be so upset because Simon was embarrassed?"

"I'm not embarrassed of you, I don't want anyone else to be either," Jim spoke softly with his head lowered. 

"We'll have some talking to do when we get home. But everything is okay with Simon, right?" Blair looked into his partners face for a good sign. 

"Yeah, everything is fine. Talk to you later, Simon," Jim pulled the door open and walked out. 

"Is it just me, or does he seem pissed off?" Simon asked Blair. 

"We'll get it worked out, don't worry," Blair walked over to his desk and sat down. 

Jim looked up at him and asked, "What?"

"I was just wondering when you're going to forgive Simon."

"Never... He's an asshole and I hate him. Now can we go back to work?" Jim started typing and tried to ignore the looks from Blair. 

Blair pulled his chair closer to Jim and whispered, "Want me to beat the shit out of him?"

Jim looked over at the black eyes and almost smiled. "You've done enough of that for a long while. I'll get over it. Now finish your work."

"Sandburg!" Simon hollered and Blair almost ran into his office. 

"Yes sir?"

"I just want to be sure that you do know that you're here without pay, right?" 

"Simon, I have two more days of my suspension. I know I don't get paid," Blair started out of the office when Simon said, "Sandburg, what's wrong?"

He shut the door again and said, "Something's going on, Simon. You must have looked at him like he was a piece of shit or something. He's really depressed and he's not talking."

"And you can tell the difference how?"

"I'm not joking sir. I want to know if you hate us for sleeping together," Blair stood up and was ready to take on his Captain. 

"If I didn't know better I'd say you were ready to take me on, defending his honor. I don't know how to tell you this Sandburg, but there is nothing to defend. He's gay, he kept it from all of us and what is there to defend?"

Blair took out his badge and his gun and gave them to Simon. "I quit. You're such a fucker. And I never thought I would think this about you."

"Sandburg, calm down. That probably came out wrong. I'm sorry," Simon tried to give the badge and gun back to Sandburg. 

"Is that how you said you were sorry to Jim? You're an asshole. His heart is broken out there because you're his best friend and you let him down," Blair opened up the door, and made his way to the elevator. 

"Chief, what's going on?" Blair was never so happy that Jim hadn't listened in on that conversation. 

"I'm just going to go down stairs and work out. I'll talk to you at lunch. Jim, I really want to be alone," Blair got into the elevator and saw his sad partner as the door closed. 

Jim marched into Simon's office and asked, "What the fuck happened?"

Simon realized Blair hadn't told him. "Well first of all I said something shitty."

"You? I can't believe it," Jim was being a little more sarcastic then was called for. 

"Anyhow, he quit. He didn't give notice, he quit," Simon got it all out as fast as he could. Before Simon could continue, the door was flung open and Joel said, "We've got trouble."

"What?" Jim was up and moving as soon as he saw that look on Joel's face. 

"Sugar Ray Sandburg is downstairs showing off his stuff again," Joel got into the lift and was followed by Jim and Simon. 

While in the lift, Joel and Simon could see Jim's hands shaking. They looked at each other with wonder. As in will wonders never cease?

They got off and headed for the workout room and saw a large man holding Sandburg. Jim walked right over to him and said, "Let him go now."

"Detective Ellison, I had to wait for you because he kept going after the idiots," Lieutenant Mitchell said."

Mitchell let Sandburg go and he stood still and looked at the ground. 

"Who was he going after, Mitchell?"

"Cason and Franklin. They came in to work out since they're suspended," Mitchell pointed to the two men in the corner. 

"Chief, did they come after you again?"

"Yeah, I was just defending myself. I didn't start the fight, just defending myself," Blair still hadn't looked up from the floor. 

Jim took his piece off and handed it to Mitchell and started walking over to the two men. Simon and Joel just stood by and watched. They knew that Jim had to do this. It would be worth the unpaid time off. 

"Hey Cason. Hey Franklin. Didn't we agree to leave Sandburg alone? I guess not," Jim grabbed Cason as he tried to get by him. Jim hit him so hard that Cason went down to the floor and didn't even bother to get up. He grabbed Franklin next and hit him, but he wasn't small. He was going to give Jim a run for his money. "What part of don't touch him again do you not understand?"

Jim could hear Blair begging Mitchell to let him go so he could help. Mitchell wasn't budging. 

Jim moved into Franklin's space and whispered, "I'm not going to hit you any more today, anyway. But if you go near Sandburg again I'll be sure to spread the new rumor."

"What new rumor?" Franklin asked and actually seemed frightened by it. 

"That the reason you want Sandburg beat up is because you're in love with me. You and I've been an item for quite some time," Jim smiled as he pulled away. 

"No one would believe you faggot," 

"Good, then I'll start it right now. You seem to want this happening, so we'll do it together," Jim watched the man's face and saw immediately that he was winning. 

"Fine. It stops here and now. He won't be touched again," Franklin leaned down to help Cason get up. He was just coming around. 

"Oh and don't forget to tell Cason he used to be my candy man," Jim smiled as the two men walked out of the room. 

When Jim walked over to Blair he pulled his face up and wanted to go and find those two again. This time Blair most likely had a broken nose. "You all right, Sandburg?"

"Yeah Jim I'm fine. I'm just going to finish my workout and see you later," Blair started over to the punching bag. 

"Chief, you need to have that nose reset. Why don't we go to the ER?" Jim led him away from the bag. 

"I'll drive you two over," Joel said as he helped both men get into the elevator. 

@@@@@

The drive over was pretty quiet and finally Joel said, "Jim, I hope you don't think I don't like you. In fact I love both of you."

"Wow, that's one of the nicest things we've heard since this whole thing started. Thanks, Joel," Blair was almost bouncing in the seat next to Jim. 

"Sandburg calm down you might have more wrong than the nose," Jim leaned Blair back and checked out the nose again. 

Joel watched them and smiled. He had never seen two men more in love and he was glad that he got to witness it. 

Once at the hospital, and after a lengthy wait, they finally got called back. As the doctor looked Blair over he said, "Wow, you have a tough job Detective,"

"Well this was just fights," Blair said with a sound of pride. 

"Well this time you have a broken nose and a cracked cheekbone. So now I want your friends out so I can reset your nose," Doctor Williams started pushing the men out. 

"Why can't Jim stay in here? I really need him in the room. Please let him come back in and I'll be good. I promise."

Doctor Williams opened the door and said, "Detective Ellison, he needs you."

Jim practically ran in there. "Hey, Chief. This will be over before you know it. Right doc?"

"Hold your partner and I'm going to do it right NOW." Even Jim wasn't expecting it to happen so fast. 

He looked down and saw the tears coming from Blair's eyes. "You all right, partner?"

Blair sniffed and said, "I'm fine. No biggy."

Doctor Williams taped Blair's nose and checked his other injuries. He turned towards Jim and asked, "First fight?"

"More or less, so he's trying to be tough."

"Okay, Detective Sandburg the room is yours for about twenty minutes, then it's time for you to go home," Williams smiled as he headed for the door. 

Blair jumped down from the examining table and said, "I don't need to stay in here for twenty minutes. I'm not a wuss."

Williams laughed and said, "Why am I not surprised? I hope you feel better soon. Here is the paper for what you're supposed to do and not do."

Blair walked out of the room and saw Joel. "Look at this Big Guy. Now I get more black eyes. And no one's going to say, he's pretty again. I always hated that," Blair slapped Joel on the back and started for the exit. 

Jim noticed that he hadn't looked at him once. He could hear him rambling, like mad. 

"And then you know what the doctor said? He said it was a wuss room and I could have it for twenty minutes to get my bearings. Oh give me a fucking break. Like I need a wuss room. Because once you're a wuss, they automatically add puss to it and that's like the kiss of death," Blair was talking non-stop but didn't see Joel looking over at Jim. 

"I've never heard of a wuss room, Blair. Maybe it was just a recovery room," Joel finally was able to say something. 

"Recovery room, wuss puss room, same difference. I'm a friggin cop and I'm tough. I don't need those fucking rooms," Blair wasn't winding down a bit. 

When they drove up to the loft, Blair turned to Joel and said, "Feel like a drink?"

"Not a chance Sandburg. Get out so I can go back to work," Joel touched his hair and and smiled. Jim pulled the young man out of Joel's car. 

He pushed him into the building so they could get home. "If you feel like it we could fuck each other senseless," Jim smiled down at Blair and noticed he got no smile. "Blair? What's wrong?"

"I'm starving all of a sudden. I'm going to make us something to eat, all right?" Blair hung his jacket up and walked into the kitchen. "What are you hungry for?"

"Chief, just make something for yourself, I'm not hungry," Jim went over and sat on the sofa and turned the television on. 

Blair came around the sofa and looked at Jim. "Hey Ellison, you all right?"

"I'm fine Blair. Go finish making your food," Jim started flipping through the channels. 

"Shit, you wanted sex and you're mad aren't you?"

"Chief, just go eat. I'm going to go out for awhile," Jim got up and put his jacket on. 

"No, don't leave me. OK?"

"Chief, you don't need me here. You haven't even looked at me since this happened," Jim tried not to lose his temper with Sandburg, but sometimes he pushed the older man. 

Blair stopped what he was doing and looked at Jim. He looked him right in the eyes and the next thing he knew he was in Jim's arms shaking. 

Jim could hear the quiet little sobs, but he wasn't ready for the next sound. "Oh God," Blair sounded grief-stricken. 

"What's wrong, Sandburg. Tell me what's wrong," Jim pushed Blair away from him so he could see the problem. 

"Oh God... Jim take me back up to the fucking ER. I need the wuss puss room. I am a wuss puss," Then Blair started to wail and Jim had a hard time keeping from laughing his butt off. 

"Jim, have you ever cried? God, please tell me you have," Blair looked up at him expectantly. 

"Yeah Chief, I cried when they told me someone hit you," Jim began to rub Blair's back hoping to relax him. 

"No, I mean have you ever cried when you were shot?"

Jim thought a moment and then smiled and said, "Yes. And you were there to help me though it. And not once did you call me a wuss puss. On the top of the building, when the Ice Man got my leg. I couldn't turn it down and you talked me through it." 

"Jim, you're so full of shit. There was no crying on the roof. There was whining on the roof, but it's not the same. So you're saying you're not a wuss but I am?"

"Okay, if this gets out, I'll kick your ass. That day when we got home, I went to bed and cried myself to sleep," Jim dared Blair to make fun of that. 

"I might be a wuss, Jim, but you're an idiot. I would have held you and made you feel better. Why didn't you call me up there?" Blair just looked at him totally confused. 

"For the same reason that you were doing it today. We think we have to be all tough and macho. Go up to bed and I'll take care of my wuss," Jim said smacking Blair on the ass as he headed for the stairs. 

"You're on. Let's see, I'll be the wuss tonight and tomorrow night you can be the wuss. All right?" Blair took off really fast up the stairs. 

"Chief, do I have to cry when I come?" Jim walked up the stairs laughing. 

"Get your ass over to this bed. I'll make you cry and it won't be because you're a wuss," Blair pulled Jim down to the bed and soon forgot all about his nose. 

 

The end


	2. What Now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The days after the episode in What Were You Thinking? Someone's making Video's of the guys and it's not the guys.

Summary: The days after the episode in What Were You Thinking? Someone's making Video's of the guys and it's not the guys. 

Acknowledgments: Thank you to Suse for both the cover art. To Mary for her wonderful work, as always. For everyone that wrote asking for a sequel to What Were You Thinking? Now you'll think twice about it. {g}

[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/whatnowcover_zpsaa760a51.jpg.html)

What Now?  
by Patt

There was an envelope sitting on Jim's desk when he arrived at work in the morning. All it said was Detective Ellison. He tore the envelope open and read what was written inside. 

_Detective Ellison,_

_As a fellow officer, I felt the need to tell you someone videotaped you and Detective Sandburg in a private moment, if you catch my drift. They're selling them in Homicide, Vice and Robbery that I know of. I am most certain that you will try to put a stop to it and discontinue the embarrassment of the Major Crime Division._

_You don't know me, so don't try and figure out whom this is from. I just don't like the idea of someone watching another officer. Good luck, Detective._

_Sincerely,_

_A friend._

Jim put the letter back into the envelope and put it in his pocket. Looking around the bullpen, he wondered if it was someone there. No one seemed to notice him watching them. 

Getting up, he went down to Forensics and asked them to see if there were fingerprints on the sheet itself. Jim needed to get it done before Sandburg came in. Carl was on duty and said he would get the results to Jim as soon as possible. 

Jim was walking back and realized he really didn't want that letter floating around. He walked back into the room and said, "Carl, I'll just hang out and see what you find out. I need the letter back, too."

"Sure, Jim. It'll be about a half-hour. Good enough?"

"Perfect," Jim walked over to the window and watched the people in the parking lot. Nothing looked out of the ordinary, until Jim saw someone staring up at the window at him. It was Cason. _He wouldn't be that dumb, would he?_

"Jim, there were only two sets of prints. Both belong to cops. One is you and the other is Lieutenant K. Harper from Vice," Carl looked over at Jim to gauge his temperament. 

"Thank you, Carl, I'll take that now and this is between me and you," Jim said over his shoulder on the way out the door. 

Jim didn't quite know what to do. Either Harper was a friend or foe. He acted like he hated him when he questioned him about Blair. But maybe he was just pissed off that Jim had let Blair get hurt. Getting off the elevator, he walked to his desk and sat down. He picked the phone up and buzzed for Rhonda. 

"Yes, Detective Ellison, what can I do for you?"

"Hey, Rhonda. I need you to get me a number for another Detective. His name is Lieutenant K. Harper and he's in Vice," Jim waited thinking she was looking for the number and finally he said, "Problems?"

"What do you need his number for?"

"Rhonda, I don't have to tell you what I want a number for, it's business," Jim almost yelled into the phone. 

"Well, why didn't you say so," Rhonda said with relief in her voice. 

"Why the fuck does it matter?" Jim said aloud, although he was just meaning to think it. 

"Well, it would matter to Blair. And we love Blair." 

"Give me a friggin' break. Could I have the number?" Jim growled. 

"It's ext 236. Do you want me to connect you now?" 

"Rhonda, I swear to god, you sounded just like a phone operator. Maybe you missed your calling in life," Jim laughed softly. "Thanks, Rhonda. Thanks for watching out for Blair, too."

"I'll get you connected to Lieutenant Harper now," Rhonda made the call and was off the line. 

"Lieutenant Harper," 

"This is Ellison. I need to talk to you, right away. Where do you want to meet?" Jim sat there and was sweating just thinking about people watching a video of him and Blair. _Fuckers..._

"In the garage, I'll be standing there. Just pull up and we'll drive out and talk away from the station." Harper hung up without even listening to see if had agreed to it. 

Jim got into his truck, backed up and Harper was standing there. Jim reached over and unlocked the door so Harper could get in. Neither man said anything as they drove out of the garage. Jim was so focused on Harper that he didn't notice Joel and Blair pull into the garage. 

"Isn't that Jim?" Joel wondered aloud. 

"Yeah, where does he think he's going?" Blair asked it as they both noticed he wasn't alone. "Isn't that Harper?"

"Yeah, it was, Blair. Must be looking into a case together," Joel realized it was lame the moment it came out of his mouth. 

"No problem, Joel. Don't worry. Jim never said he wouldn't have other partners from time to time. In fact, it's no different then you and I working together, I'm sure. Talk to you later, man." Blair almost ran up to the elevator and jumped on and went upstairs. 

Blair questioned himself all the way up. He knew Jim wouldn't fuck around on him. He's probably just working. Then why didn't he tell him? This is work. Blair needed to leave his love life at home. He was wondering if it had anything to do with that. Maybe it was all about work. 

When Joel got back upstairs he saw Blair sitting at his desk working hard. He walked past and rapped on Simon's door. 

"Come in." Simon stood up got he and Joel a cup of his newest blend of coffee. 

"Simon, I need to know something. Did you send Ellison out on a call anywhere?"

"Nah, he took some comp time. He said he needed to take care of some things. Actually, I was surprised when I saw his partner still here," Simon said, looking out over the bullpen as he sipped his coffee. 

"Well, I just wondered, sir," Joel stood to leave. 

"Don't sir me. What's going on?"

"He was with Harper in the parking garage and Blair saw them. I told him it was probably a case he was assigned to, but I guess that's not the case." Joel began pacing in front of Simon's desk. 

"Don't worry. I'm sure they just went out for coffee or something. You know two men can go out for coffee and not be involved." Simon set his cup down and said, "Now I need to get back to work."

"Talk to you later, Simon," Joel walked out the door and went to his office hoping he wouldn't have to glance at Blair looking so sad, more than once. 

 

Jim looked over at Harper and said, "So why are you helping me?"

"Because you seem to be standing up to everyone, showing you're strong and not some weak fag. I hate when a gay person does that. You and Sandburg don't deserve this shit." Harper continued looking out the window while they drove. 

"Have you seen a copy?"

"Yeah, they were showing it around to get the orders. How specific do you want me to get?" Harper finally looked at Jim. 

Jim pulled into a parking lot and started taking deep breaths. "Okay, hit me. I want to hear all about it and how do I get a copy?"

"Someone would've had to have been across the street from your loft. You're both naked and in that one you were fucking Sandburg. And mind you, you did it very nicely in my opinion. Of course, they all think you fuck just like the fag you are. Their words, not mine." Harper just sat there waiting for the next question. 

"Well, there really isn't anything we can do. I mean, they've all seen my ass. They've all seen me fuck my partner." Jim started beating his fists all over the steering wheel. 

Harper finally pulled Jim's hands off the wheel and said, "Ellison, you need to do something. It's not right. Go to Captain Banks report the tapes being sold and get IA on this but do something. They all want to know if he's good, you know? You make it seem like he's your entire world while you fuck him and they don't like it. Watch out for him." Harper let go of Jim's hand and moved back over to the door again. 

"I just don't understand why you're being nice to us. It makes no sense." Jim looked honestly confused. 

"I'm gay, Ellison. But unlike you, I'm careful about my lifestyle."

A very shocked Ellison sat very still for a moment before he started the truck. "I don't want to argue about things with you. I need to get back to the station. Ready to go back?" 

"Ready as I'll ever be." Harper might be 6'8" tall, be buff and tough, but he still didn't like this ugliness going on. Made him nervous and now there was a huge possibility of him being outed. _Fuck! Why didn't I stay out of it?_

 

Jim got off the elevator and approached him partner and said, "I'll be right out Chief. I need to talk to Simon."

"Like I care. Do whatever you want," Blair began typing again. 

Leaning in to Blair Jim whispered, "What's going on, Chief?"

"Lunch date, Jim?" At that moment, Jim knew that Blair had somehow seen him with Harper. _Fuck..._

Blair knew that he was not so much jealous of the two men being together but the two men working together. Blair liked to think he was Jim's only partner. 

"I have to speak with Simon and then we'll go to lunch and I'll tell you what happened," Jim walked towards Simon's office and heard Blair say, "I'm going out on a case with Joel. This is work, after all."

Jim walked back over to him and pleaded, "Please don't leave. Promise me you'll wait so that we can talk."

"Fine, go."

Jim knocked on Simon's office and entered when he heard, "What do you want?"

"Bad day, Simon?"

"You could say that. What's going on with you?"

"Sir, I got this note today and I found out who sent it. I found out that tapes of Sandburg and I are being sold all over the place."

"Have you told Sandburg yet?"

"Not yet, sir. I was hoping you'd have some ideas on where we would go from here." Jim looked totally lost. 

"We'll start with IA and also calling the Captains' in charge and we'll get to the bottom of this. Let me get Sandburg in here," Simon opened the door and yelled, "Where's Sandburg?"

Jim jumped up when he realized that Blair hadn't stayed where he was supposed to be. 

Simon bellowed, "Connor, Rafe and Brown get your butts in here. Joel, since you're here, come on in, too."

They all walked into the room and wondered what was going on. Simon explained it all to them and told him how dangerous it could be for both men. 

"I'm going to fucking kill them." Connor stood up and went towards to door. 

"Connor, where do you think your going?" Simon asked. 

"Sandy's downstairs working out and then taking a shower. I didn't know he was in danger or I would have went with him." Connor opened the door and started out. 

"Thanks, Connor," Jim went flying through the bullpen. 

"Has it always been this far to the locker room?" Rafe asked. 

"It is when you have a crazed Jim Ellison on your hands," Connor laughed as she punched his arm. 

Jim punched her back and said, "I'll get you for that."

None of them were aware of the hell that Blair was going through at that moment. 

@@@@@

**Locker Room:**

"Well, if it isn't the pretty boy. Even with your nose broke, you're pretty." Detective Nance was touching Blair while he spoke. 

"Knock it off, Nance. Get your fucking hands off of me," Blair shoved the larger man away and moved further into the locker room not knowing that's what they all wanted. 

Blair looked around and realized that he was surrounded. That fucking dick that was with Jim today was in the shower. It looked like he was giving him the evil eye, so of course Blair gave it right back. 

"We've so enjoyed the video of you and your partner and we want to try out the man that makes James Ellison moan and get so sappy over. It would be best if you didn't fight us," Franklin moved closer to Nance with a big smile on his face.

"You guys are going to be so fucking sorry if you don't let go of me now," Blair rasped out trying to get away from them. 

"You looked real pretty in the tape," Cason said starting to unbutton Blair's shirt. 

"What are you talking about? What tape?" Blair was panicking and didn't know what to do.

"The tape of Big Boy Ellison fucking your ass. He made it look so good that we have to check this out for ourselves," Jensen spat at Blair. 

"Jim will kill all of you. I hope you know that," Blair spat out still fighting to get away from them. 

"Pretty boy, we're not one bit afraid of Ellison. He's a pansy," Nance whispered into Blair's ear making Blair shiver and not a good shiver. 

Harper took that very moment to walk into the locker room, naked and strong. This man looked even taller without clothes on to Blair. "What's going on, guys?"

"You're in for some real fun now, Harper. We all get to try out Sandburg and we know how much you hate Ellison, so here's your chance," Cason was really getting into this. 

"Explain something to me. You all hate fags, am I right?" Harper asked quietly. 

"Of course we do," Jensen answered. 

"Well then, what I want to know is, why in the hell would you want to fuck him if you hate men who fuck men. That would make you fags. Am I correct?" 

"No, it's not correct. We just want to try him out and see what's so special about him," Nance moved closer to the door in case Sandburg would make a run for it. 

"I'll show you special. You're the worst kind of fags. You're the ones that hide behind your everyday lives and tell people you're all right. When in all actuality your as fucked up as everyone else. I don't care how you're looking at this; it's gay. You're all fucking gay." Blair stood his ground as he ranted. 

Nance walked up to him and slapped him hard. "Keep your mouth shut you little fag."

"Why? Do I scare ya, Nance? Does it bother you that everyone knows about you now? Because I'm telling you, you're a flaming gay." Blair again stood waiting for a blow. 

"He's just saying that to stall, Nance," Jensen said from behind him, "we're not fucking gay."

Blair started laughing and said, "Think about that for a moment. Fucking gay? I love that term. And now I have you all using it. My job is done."

Cason came up and slugged Blair really hard, causing Blair to double over. "Now let's see who has the big talk."

"Oh yeah, you hit like a fag, too," Blair spit out once he got his breath back. 

Franklin headed towards him and said, "Fuck this shit. Let's get this show on the road. Harper, do you want him first or what?"

"So since I hate Ellison, I get first stab at Sandburg? Is that correct?"

"You sure can. Want him now?" Jensen asked almost bouncing. 

Blair looked around the room and wanted to gag. But he had to keep his head. Okay, so he didn't keep his head this whole time. He knew he was going to get raped. His gun and his equipment were in the locker. Now he watched as this huge man, who hated Jim, came towards him. 

Harper pushed Blair up against the locker and Blair started punching and fighting and finally he got hold of Blair's face and he said, "Blair, trust me."

He looked around and saw everyone watching him and he yelled, "I don't do peep shows." He then dragged Blair kicking and screaming to the next row of lockers. 

"Sandburg, get up and ready to run," Harper whispered. 

"Why are you helping me?" Blair honestly couldn't figure this out. 

"Because I like you and Ellison together, and yes, I'm gay. They'll figure it out soon. I've hated them all for years," Harper realized he had no clothing on. "Fuck, there is no time for getting dressed. Everyone will just have to see me naked running with Blair Sandburg. I'll be the talk of the station."

"Ready, Harper? I won't go without you." Blair took his arm and pulled him closer. "Can we beat them to the elevator. If we could get on there, we'd be all right."

"Yeah, I'm going to lift you up and pretend I'm taking you somewhere," Harper lifted him up and threw him over his shoulder. Then as he ran out the doorway, they all started after him. 

He hit the button for the elevator and it opened. He pushed the close door button and tried not to breathe so hard. 

"Harper, you could put me down now, man. Thanks a lot," Blair took his shirt off and handed it to the large man and said, "In case you want to cover something up."

"Thanks, Sandburg," Harper put the shirt on like an apron and used the sleeve to tie in the back. His ass was still out, but at least everything wouldn't be hanging out for the whole world to see. 

Harper pulled him into a strong hug and found a very responsive Blair. 

"Shit, Harper, I was scared out of my mind. Thank you so much," Blair talked into the large man's body, not showing him his face. 

"Hey Sandburg, you did really well. You didn't let those fuckers know you were scared. I have to tell you I was impressed. And I was scared shitless too, so don't feel lonely," Harper continued to keep Blair in his arms seeming to need the feel of him to calm down. 

When they got off of the lift, Blair asked one of the other officers where Ellison was. "He's downstairs looking for your butt. Better stay put. Love the look, Harper." Officer Reed laughed as he walked away. 

"Hey, Harper, let's wait right here because they'll probably be right back. I don't want to have you going all over the place with your butt hanging out," Blair said laughing good-naturedly. 

"Keep laughing, funny boy, and I'll take your pants," Harper said laughing just as hard. 

"Oh shit! I can see it now. Look, Harper's wearing shorts to work," 

"Well, it would be better than being naked," Harper said seriously.

"Thank you again, Harper," Blair hugged him once more before he leaned against the wall that was opposite the elevator. 

@@@@@

**Locker Room Again:**

"What do you mean it's empty? Did we miss them on the elevator?" Rafe asked Jim. 

"Let's take the elevator this time, Jimbo," Connor was irritated. 

"Nobody better have hurt our Hairboy," Brown was almost running to the lift. 

"Our Hairboy? Something you want to talk to me about, Brown?" Jim asked while smiling. 

"We all love him, Ellison. Not just you. So get over it," Rafe growled as he joined Brown in the lift. 

The ride up was pretty quiet and when the doors opened they were greeted to a nearly naked Harper and a semi-naked Sandburg. 

"What's going on? Are you two all right?" Jim asked looking from one to the other. 

"We'll fill you in when we talk to Captain Banks. Then I'll have to start looking for a new precinct. Shit..." Harper said as he walked to Simon's office. 

"Oh MY god! Be still my heart," Connor said as she tried to get closer to watch him. 

Jim leaned in and whispered, "He plays for the other team, Connor. Too bad, so sad."

Imagine Simon's face when he had two semi-naked men walk into his office. "All right, what in the hell is going on? And why are you naked, Harper?"

"Sir, I can answer that for him. He had no time to dress. He was saving my ass." Blair beamed over at Harper and Jim wasn't wild about that look of adoration. 

"Why am I not surprised? Okay, someone start at the top," Simon sat down and chewed on his cigar nervously. "Ellison, go and get this man some clothing while they fill me in."

"Sure. Why do I need to hear what in the hell happened?" Jim mumbled as he left the office. 

"Kicked out already, Jimbo?" Connor asked, trying not to laugh. 

"I have to go and get clothes for Harper. You know... the man of the fucking hour," Jim started punching the elevator button over and over again. 

"Jim, stop it. I'll ride down with you and we'll talk."

"I don't need to talk, Connor. In fact... go away!" Jim got onto the elevator looking like a lost soul. 

Connor never listened to Jim before, so why would she start now? "Connor, did you not hear me say I wanted to be alone?"

"Oh yeah, big man, I heard you say it but I knew you needed me to help you."

"Help me what? God, you Aussie's are weird."

"Will you stop saying that? I might be weird but don't blame Australia. They're fine, I'm just odd." 

Jim couldn't help it, he started laughing. "All right, Connor, what do you want to help me with?"

"I want to help you see that Blair adores you. Why are you pulling this crap with Harper? He doesn't have a thing for Sandy." Connor shoved Jim over to the correct locker and they opened it. 

"He doesn't have a thing for Sandy. Well fuck, now you have me calling him Sandy. Will you fucking stop that, Connor?"

"Fine. I'll call him that cold impersonal Sandburg like you do." 

"Anyhow, its Blair. He's looking at Harper like he's the best thing in the world. He used to look at me like that. Then he just toughened up and didn't need me so much. And now... he's got someone else to look up to." 

"Get a grip, Ellison. He thinks you're Superman or Batman. I, myself, think it's more like Spiderman. The way you're always running into walls and stuff. "

"Very funny, Connor. Well, I still feel like crap about it," Jim sounded very depressed as he spoke. 

"Oh my, he has nice boxer briefs. These are so sexy. Do you wear them, Jim?"

"No. Geeze, you're way past weird. Are you saying men look better in them?"

"Yes, in my opinion, they do. If you got some of those and traipsed around the loft, Blair would be insane with need. Want me to shop with you tomorrow?"

"I might take you up on that. I know nothing about that kind of stuff but I do want to look good for him. After all, he's so young." Jim sighed as he grabbed everything else they needed from the locker. 

"Jim, you're only nine years older than he is. Don't get a room at the home yet. Besides you have a damn nice package to show off. We just need to show it more."

"Thanks, Connor," Jim said, smiling. 

"You know what really drives Blair wild, Jim?"

"Evidentially not," Jim replied sadly. 

"He told me once that when you have Kevlar on, he almost came in his pants. And another time he told me that when you walked in the loft with your shoulder holster on he again, almost came in his pants. You now need to work this into your daily life." Connor looked over at Jim, smiling. 

"I can't believe he tells you that shit."

"Well, Jim it's because I'm like his sister. You'd tell your sister that stuff, right?"

"No..." 

"Okay, well are you going to show up in bed one night, wearing only Kevlar?"

"I might." Jim smiled this time. 

"And how about naked with a shoulder holster on? Gonna try it?"

"I might," Jim was beaming by this time. "He really fucking said this?"

"Yes, Jim, he really fucking said that. He adores you and he thinks you are one hot potato." Connor slugged Jim in the arm "So, Jim, you do know that you can come and talk to me right?"

"I guess. Connor, I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that. I mean, I have a hard enough time talking to Blair," Jim ran a hand over his tired face. 

"Well, you can talk to me, Jim. And if it's something you're not comfortable with you can just talk about something else." Connor draped an arm over his shoulder and he smiled at her. 

"Connor, I think this is one of the weirdest talks I've ever had with you and I didn't think that was possible. But, thanks, it took my mind off of feeling sorry for myself. Should we stop by Blair's locker and get his things?" 

"Jim, he's dressed." Connor started laughing. 

"I mean, his gun and his shield and he wasn't wearing shoes,"

"Jim, I didn't even notice that. What kind of cop am I?"

"A lousy one?" Jim started laughing as he picked up all of Blair's things and they made their way upstairs. 

Jim and Connor took everything into Simon's office. Simon looked at Connor and said, "I think you should leave. Let's give him some privacy."

"Oh fine, you party poopers," Connor left the office and slammed the door. 

As quickly as he could Harper got dressed. He stood taller, to Jim, once he had clothes on. Jim looked over at him and moaned. _He looks great even when he's dressed._

Harper leaned into Jim and said, "He's just grateful. He's not in love with me. It's you he wants. He's pissed off at you though."

"He's always pissed at me," Jim sighed and sat down on the sofa. 

"Jim, while you were gone I filled Sandburg and Harper in on what's being done. All of the Captains have been notified and they have informed us that there are only three tapes. One is in homicide, one in Vice and the last one in Robbery. They're to bring them to us and the men are all being brought up on charges. Next, Lieutenant Harper has made his statement against Cason, Franklin, Jensen and Nance. It's going to be attempted rape, and if the DA doesn't go with that, it'll be aggravated assault. Not to mention, the video taping and sales of said video tapes. No matter what, the fuckers are going down for it. What happens from there, I don't know. But they won't be cops anymore."

"Thanks, Simon. I'm glad that it worked out pretty well," Jim said, sitting on the sofa. 

Blair was watching him and said, "Jim, could I talk to you in private, please?" 

Jim got up slowly and followed Blair out of the office. They walked into one of the interrogation rooms and Blair shut the door. 

"I want you to talk to me right now. What's going on?"

"Blair, would you like it better if I wore boxer briefs?" Jim just stood there with a sad look on his face. 

"Jim, I love the way you look right now. If you want to wear them, that's fine. But don't do it for me. Now I want to know why when you walked off that elevator and saw me there you didn't hug me. You didn't seem to care if I was all right," Blair was getting closer to Jim as he spoke. 

"Chief, I could see you were all right. You didn't seem to need me. You haven't needed me in a long time." Jim sat there with his head down. 

"Well, Ellison, isn't that fucking bullshit? Baby boy Sandburg grew up. I'm fine, Jim, but I still like the hugs and the attention." He pulled Jim closer to him and kissed him. 

"I saw the way you were looking at him in Simon's office. Like you used to look at me," 

"Ellison, I'm going to kick your sweet ass. Man, you piss me off."

"It's true! I saw it." Jim stood up and began to pace. 

"Jim, it might have escaped your notice but they were going to fucking gang bang me. I was scared shitless. I knew you wouldn't get there in time, there were too many of them for me to fight alone. I figured I was going to die. I was scared, okay. Are you happy now? That's why I was looking at him like that. He didn't tell any of you how scared I was." Blair leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. 

Jim took Blair into his arms and said, "I'm sorry, babe. I'm really sorry. I love you so much and I didn't ask you how you were. You have every right to be scared. I was scared when I heard about it. I wanted to fucking kiss Harper for saving you. At the same time, I wanted to kick his ass for doing something I treasure. Keeping you safe is part of my life. I'm a jealous prick, what can I say?"

"I'll tell you what you can say. What in the hell were you talking about boxer briefs for?"

"Megan saw Harper's and told me I should wear them for you. She said you'd like them a lot. Something about not showing my package off well enough."

"I'm going to smack her. That woman is a menace. How about another kiss?"

They kissed for a while and then pulled apart. "Got to keep this stuff away from work, man." Blair pulled him out of the Interrogation room. 

When they returned to Simon's office, everyone was gone. Jim knocked once and opened the door. 

"Sorry to bother you, but what's going to happen to Harper?"

"He's transferring up here. He met and liked everyone while he was involved with this, so he's transferring," Simon stuck that big ole wet cigar back in his mouth. 

"EWWWWWWW! Simon, could that be any grosser?" Blair asked. 

"You told me not to smoke, so I'm not." 

"Jim, doesn't that gross you out?"

"Sir, we need to go home," Jim opened the door and pulled Blair out with him. 

"Is it a Sentinel thing?" Simon asked quietly. 

"You could say that," Jim pushed Blair out and they got on to the elevator and pushed the button for the garage. 

@@@@@

**The Loft:**

Jim hadn't said much all the way home. Once they got there, he walked upstairs and got undressed and walked into the bathroom for a shower. 

"Want some company, big man?"

"Nah, I'm just going to try and relax and then we can lay upstairs and talk if you want." Jim shut the door of the bathroom and Blair didn't know what to do. 

He dialed Simon's office and heard, "Banks."

"Simon, I need some advice. Something's wrong with Jim. He's acting all weird and won't let me get close to him." Blair hoped that Simon would have a clue. 

"What's he doing now?"

"He's in the shower," Blair answered. 

"Once he gets upstairs tell him that you're scared and you need him to hold you. I think he's freaking out and he's scared to death. Just my take on it, but try it,"

"Thanks, Simon. Bye."

Jim came walking out of the bathroom, listened for Blair and found his heartbeat upstairs but it was a little fast and his breathing was labored. Jim went rushing up the stairs and crawled into the bed with Blair and he asked, "What's wrong, Babe? Tell me what's wrong."

"Please hold me. I'm scared," Blair went into Jim's welcoming arms. 

As they lay there holding each other the oddest thing happened to Jim. He realized he was scared, too. He started shaking. Blair wasn't sure at first what he was doing. 

"I love you, Jim," Blair whispered into Jim's ear. 

The big man held Blair tighter and this time let go of a lot of tension. He began a quiet litany, "I love you, Blair. I can't live without you. I never want to lose you. Please don't ever leave me." 

"I love you back. I wouldn't want to live without you, either. We're never going to lose each other and I'm never going to leave you. I adore you." This time Blair was the one shaking. 

The kissing progressed into Jim moving into a '69' position. He took Blair's cock into his mouth and began playing with the gorgeous organ. Blair was doing the same thing to Jim. Each man determined to make the other come first. Jim pulled away for a moment and got some lube and slid a well lubricated digit into Blair's tight channel. As he started putting the second finger in, Blair was beginning the same thing. Both men began sucking very hard and both knew the other was close. Jim touched the pleasure spot and Blair shot into Jim's mouth, screaming as much as he could with a cock in his mouth. As soon as he got his breath back, he started getting serious with Jim. After rubbing Jim's prostate a few times, he came shooting into Blair's mouth. 

Jim moved up and lay next to the love of his life. Before long they were both sound asleep.

@@@@@

 

About two hours later the phone rang, scaring both men. Blair grabbed it and said, "What now?"

"I just wanted to let you both know you're off tomorrow," Simon said, trying not to laugh. 

"Thanks, sir and goodbye." Blair hung up not even waiting for a reply. 

"What now, Sandburg?" Jim smiled at his love. 

"I'll show you what now," and the boys were off and running again. 

@@@@@

 

Both men were basking in the afterglow of sex, when Jim said, "Shit, someone's here." Getting up, he pulled his jeans on and went down to answer the door. 

He opened it up to find one tired looking Harper on his doorstep. "Hey, Ellison," Harper tried to act cool while still stuck out in the hallway with his suitcase. 

"Sorry, come on in. What are you doing here?" Jim tried to bite his tongue before he said it, but he wasn't quick enough. 

"Excuse Jim, Harper, he's a bear when he's tired. What's up?" Blair walked down the stairs wearing skintight jeans and no shirt and Jim was ready to knock him up side the head. _What a fucking caveman you've turned out to be._

"Well, I shared a place with two guys and I'm not one of the most popular right now, so I wondered if I could sleep on your sofa for a few days until I get a new place." Harper hoped Jim would buy this. 

"Man, we've got one better. You can have the spare room. Stay as long as you like, okay?" Blair took his arm and led him into his old room. They had replaced the futon with a double bed. Blair looked at the bed and looked at Harper and said, "I don't think you're going to fit on this one, wanna sleep with Jim? I can take this room."

"No, he's not sleeping with me, Chief. Get your ass upstairs," Jim growled and then he smiled at Harper and said, "Thanks again for being there for my partner. Towels and toiletries are in here," Jim pointed to a cabinet and then walked up the stairs. 

Once he was up there Blair whispered, "Did you lock up?"

"Fuck," Jim started back down the stairs. He locked the front door and was turning to go back up and he saw Harper standing there looking lost. "Problem?"

"Could I talk to you for a moment? Privately?" Harper looked almost nervous, which was odd to Jim. 

"What's going on?" Jim sat down on the edge of the bed. 

Harper sat next to him and said, "Are you certain you don't mind having me here? You seemed kind of pissed a moment ago. I don't want to come between you and Sandburg."

"Nah, you're fine. Seeing anyone right now?" Jim asked out of the blue. 

"Yeah, I'm seeing someone, but he wants to keep it quiet. So I don't see him much," Harper stood up as if he wanted Jim to leave. 

"Well, just know that you're safe here. You can bring anyone home, it's fine with us, as long as they're not axe murderers." Jim smiled and walked out of the room. "Oh and one more thing, Harper."

"Yeah?"

"Don't be walking around in those boxer briefs. Okay?"

"Sure. Night, Jim."

"Alright, I lied. One more thing. What the fuck is your fist name?"

Laughing, Harper said, "Promise not to laugh?" Jim nodded his head and Harper answered, "It's Kelly."

"Nice Irish name. Why would that bother you?"

"Look at me, Jim. Do I really remind you of a Kelly?"

"Well, what's your middle name?"

"It's Carter. Kelly Carter Harper."

"How about K.C.?"

"Shit! That would be a lot better. Thanks for the idea. Night, Jim."

"Night, Kelly."

"Jim, if you don't get your ass up here, you're going to be sleeping with Kelly," Blair yelled over the railing. 

Both large men laughed as Jim rushed up the stairs. 

Harper had a hard time sleeping because Jim and Blair were making quite a bit of noise. _I wish it was me._

@@@@@

In the morning, coffee was made and breakfast was almost done when Blair came down the stairs. He was his usual sleepy self and saw the newspaper and said, "Morning, big man." Then he leaned in and kissed him. 

Jim stood in the doorway and smiled as he said, "Chief."

"Oh fuck... Jim, I'm sorry, babe. You know I'm not awake before I have coffee. God, I'm sorry, Harper."

"You're a damn fine kisser, Sandburg, so no need to apologize," Harper got up to finish cooking and smiled at the young man trying to explain to Jim. 

"Are you saying he tastes just like me?"

"NO! I wasn't awake. Damn it! You know I didn't do it on purpose." Blair was getting angry by this time. 

"Wow, is it going to be this fun every morning, guys?" Harper asked with an evil grin on his face. 

Jim winked and said, "You betcha. Blair is always good fun in the morning."

"Hey, I resemble that remark," Blair mumbled. 

Blair couldn't believe how easily Jim had made fun of him. _He's going to pay._

@@@@@

Both men decided that they'd go ahead and go into work. They had things to do. Jim called and told Simon they'd be there shortly. 

"So, Chief, did you want to invite any other men home tonight?"

"Fuck you, Ellison. He saved my life, you asshole." Blair's lower lip was trembling and that always did it for Jim. 

"Chief, I was joking. I'm sorry. You're right; we do need to help Harper. I just didn't think it involved your lips on his."

"Fuck you again, Ellison. I don't want to discuss this anymore. Stop talking to me," Blair put earphones on and turned the music up. 

"Really mature, Sandburg." Jim sighed as he pulled into the garage. 

When they got off the elevator and went into Major Crime, Harper was sitting at his new desk. 

"It's nice to see you're going to grace us with your presence, Sandburg and Ellison," Simon called out from his doorway. "Do you want to get in here or do I have to send an invitation?"

"Jesus, what crawled up his ass?" Jim asked Blair as they walked to the doorway. 

"I guess it must be going around, Ellison." Blair walked in and sat down. 

"Well good morning to you too, Sandburg. Problem in paradise?"

"No, we're fine. He's a dick, but he was dick before I was sleeping with him, so it's not like a major change." Blair pulled out his tablet and pen and readied to take notes. 

"That's a little more than I wanted to know, but I do understand about the dick remark."

"Excuse me... I'm in the room. Do you mind?" Jim whined. 

"Sorry, hot shot, we forget about you sometimes," Blair was trying not to laugh. 

"Seriously, guys, I have a job for you. We need some gay guys for this. Undercover. Actually, I need Harper and Ellison. Sandburg, I need you for surveillance and backup. It starts tonight. You up for this, Ellison?"

"Yes, sir." Jim answered quietly. 

"Okay, I've already told Harper and he's fine with it, too. Jim, you'll need to fill him in on what you'll be doing. Sandburg, you're with Connor and Brown. Keep these guys safe," Simon started to fill the two men in, so they would both be aware.

"Now get out," Simon stood up and opened his door and they walked out. 

"Oh, all of you on the night shift need to take off early so you can rest up. Good luck and I want full reports in the morning." Simon then quietly shut his door. 

Jim noticed that Blair hadn't said a word since Simon's office. "Chief, you all right?"

"Why wouldn't I be all right? Just because my partner is being partnered with another person, shouldn't bother me. Right?"

"Chief, let's finish our paperwork and we'll discuss this at home." For once Jim was glad when Blair didn't argue with him. 

Jim was working on his last case and Harper walked up and said, "Remember what you said about having someone over? Well, could they come during the day since we're going to be out all night?"

"Yeah, that's fine. Here take my key if you're ready to go home," Jim handed the loft key over to him and Blair just sat there with his mouth open. 

"That all right with you, Sandburg?" 

"Yeah, that's fine, thanks for asking my opinion. Nice to see someone cares."

Jim just rolled his eyes and went back to his work. This day couldn't end soon enough. 

@@@@@

Not one word was said by either man on the way home. They rode up to their floor and unlocked the door. 

Jim said, "Shhhhh. Harper has someone in there with him."

"Like I care," Blair walked up the stairs and started stripping. Jim followed him up and said, "How can I fix this? I don't want you mad at me. I can't stand it."

"You want to make me happy? Let me fuck you senseless and you have to be very vocal. I don't want you being quiet. That drives me nuts. What do you think?"

"Okay." Jim stripped and got on the bed, looking like a condemned man. 

"Jim, this is supposed to be fun, babe. Now just relax and enjoy."

Blair flipped Jim over easily and got him positioned for a good tongue fucking. Getting in between Jim's legs, he was able to get at that beautiful ass more easily. He started licking his ass first. Then he spread the gorgeous crevice and slid his tongue into Jim's hole. Jim almost came off the bed when Blair did it and started moaning loudly. Blair continued doing it until Jim was ready to come. He then flipped the large man back over and started sucking his cock. Jim was thrusting his hips up with each motion of Blair's mouth. The entire time yelling, "Fuck me, baby. Fuck me, baby." Pulling his mouth off Jim's cock he grabbed the lube and started getting Jim ready. By the third finger, he was fucking himself on Blair's fingers. "How bad do you want me, baby?" Blair teased him. 

"I want you now. Please. I have to come, Chief. I have to come," Jim was begging so wonderfully that Blair decided to give in. Jim's legs went easily around Blair's waist and Blair slid into the warm, tight, channel. Jim screamed his name. Blair never expected that and he began to pound into Jim hitting his prostate over and over again. Jim could tell Blair was close so he fisted his cock two times and came all over his chest and stomach. Blair followed soon after, pulling Jim's legs down and they lay in each other arms kissing. 

"Hey, Jim, what was that all about? You never do what I ask. I loved it." 

 

"Blair, I don't want to lose you because I'm quiet and reserved." Jim kissed him back. 

"Why would you lose me?"

"You seemed on the edge this morning, Chief,"

"Jim, even when I'm pissed off at you, I'm still not going to leave you, got it?"

"Got it. But I had fun just now, Chief. That's the best sex I've ever had. Letting yourself go is probably a good thing,"

"It was a very good thing. How about us getting a little sleep before tonight? I promise I won't throw a fit about me not being with ya."

"Just remember that I want you there, too. Okay?"

"Night, babe." Blair cleaned them both up and then went into Jim's waiting arms for six hours of sleep. 

When they got up, they all took turns in the shower. A man walked out of the room and Blair said, "Hey, aren't you Bill Meyers from the 12th precinct?"

"Yeah, good to see you, Sandburg." He shook Blair's hand nervously. 

Jim walked out of the bathroom and said, "Hey, Meyers, how you doing?" He walked over and got all of them a cup of coffee and Meyers started to relax. 

"Okay. I guess Harp was right. He said you were good guys but I wasn't sure and I overslept."

Harper walked out and said, "So did you meet, Mey?"

"You guys are too cute for words," Blair smiled as he began to drink his coffee. 

"What do you mean?" Harper asked. 

"Well, he calls you Harp and you call him Mey. It just cracks me up. I love it. Like I said, too cute for words," Blair rinsed his cup out and started to get ready for the night. 

Meyers walked up to Jim and said, "Hey, Ellison could I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure, we can go in the hallway if you want privacy." Jim led him out into the hall. 

"I know this is going to sound dumb, but would you really watch out for Harp's back? People are threatening him at work. Everyone seems to hate him and he's a little down. I'm afraid he's not in top form." Meyers looked into Jim's eyes and saw a good man looking back. 

"Sure, I'm going to watch his back and he's going to watch mine. Don't worry, okay?" Jim led him back into the loft and they found an angry Harper. 

"What did you ask him, Mey? Did you ask him to babysit me? You think I can't fucking take care of myself anymore?"

"He asked me if he could come more than just tonight to spend the night. He felt comfortable here and just wondered how I felt about it," Jim hoped he would believe that. 

"That's great, Mey. I'm glad. Sorry, guys. Okay, well I have to get to work. How do we do this?"

"You ride with me and Sandburg will take your vehicle." Jim smiled as he walked out the door. 

"Sandburg, you better not hurt my truck," Harper called out as he threw the keys over his shoulder to a laughing Sandburg. 

"What is it with you big guys? You have to have trucks?"

"There's a booster seat in the back. Use it," Harper said laughing loudly. 

"Oh, that was so fucking funny I forgot to laugh." Blair crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue.

@@@@@

On the drive over, Harper and Ellison had some things to discuss. 

"What are we trying to do tonight? Captain Banks said you would fill me in." Harper said. 

"There are five people that offer money to a couple for photography and then they drug them and do things that aren't so nice to them. But none of the men remember because of the drugs in their system," Jim answered. 

"So who's going to lead when we dance?" Harper looked over at Jim waiting for the answer. 

"Well, shit! I guess it's you. I've always said it would be the larger person. That would be you. Happy?" Jim growled. 

"Hell, yes! I love to dance, but I love to lead more."

"I'm so fucking happy that you're feeling good about our dance card." Jim pulled into the parking lot and shut the truck off. 

"Jim, can we practice kissing? I think we need to." Harper moved closer to Jim, while Jim was moving farther away. Jim's head hit the window and he growled at Harper, "What are you doing?"

"We have to be comfortable with each other or they won't buy it. So I'm saying we make out right now and practice." Harper stood his ground. 

"I really didn't want to kiss. Jesus, I hate this job sometimes," Jim looked more upset than mad. 

"Jim, it's okay if you get a little hot and bothered. That's normal. It'll be just between you and me, okay?"

"I just want you to know that I've never kissed anyone besides Sandburg and I might freak out." 

"Freak out all you want as long as it looks like you're doing it for me," Harper leaned into Jim and kissed him so tenderly it took Jim by surprise. _Who would have thought a man this size would be tender?_

Jim finally closed his eyes and relaxed into the kiss and found out that Harper was one hell of a kisser. After about ten minutes, they pulled away from each other and Jim said, "Shit..."

"Tell me about it," Harper said as he opened the door and got out. He waited for Jim to come around and slid his arm around him and they walked into the bar. They found a table and sat down and Harper leaned in and kissed Jim again. "Harper, I don't think this is a really good idea," Jim said nervously. 

Harper moved over closer and said, "It's making me hard, too, Ellison. You're not the only one."

"But I'm in a relationship and feel like I'm fucking around on him," Jim still wasn't really looking at Harper. 

"Let's dance, Jim, and we'll try and forget things." Harper pulled Jim out to the dance floor. 

As they began to slow dance, Jim started to relax a little bit, until he felt Harper moving in closer and holding him tighter. The taller man leaned down and kissed Jim as they danced. 

Jim decided that this was his job; he had to do it. And he had to do it right. Harper would be able to feel him against him but there was nothing he could do about that. 

By the fifth slow dance Jim was ready to come in his jeans. _Jesus! You're such a slut, Ellison._ Harper grabbed his hand and pulled him off into the bathroom. He pushed Jim into a stall and said, "I don't know about you but I have to take some of this pressure off or I'm going to come in my jeans."

He proceeded to pull his cock out and fist it hard and fast. The smell alone was driving Jim insane with need. He pulled his cock out and started doing the same thing. Both men came at the same time and leaned against each other until they got their breath back. Both men tucked themselves back into their pants and they went to wash up and go back out. 

Once they were back out on the dance floor they were a lot more relaxed and they laughed and talked for the next hour. When they sat back at the table they were approached by two men. 

"Hey, guys, feel like having your pictures taken for extra money. It doesn't have to be nudes." the tall dark haired man asked. 

"I don't think so, but thanks anyhow," Harper said. 

"Hey, Harp, we could use the extra cash with the party coming up," Jim said innocently. 

"Well that's settled then, fella's. You can ride with us," the short blond said. 

Jim and Harper followed them to their van, knowing that their backup would be following them. 

The dark haired men gave the guys a beer. Jim and Harper opened them and Jim took a drink. It never occurred to them that the drug would be inside a beer bottle. 

"What do you mean the van won't start?" Blair asked in a panicked voice. 

"Hey, Sandy, we have no control over that," Connor snapped back at him. 

"Shit, we need to do something," Brown jumped out of the van and went to see if Jim left his keys in his truck. 

Blair felt his pockets and said, "I've got Jim's extra keys. Come on guys."

They all piled into the truck and went off in search of the missing van. "Shit, do I need to call it in, saying we lost them?" Brown asked no one in particular. 

"Duh, what do you think?" Blair said sarcastically. 

Brown called it in and there was more backup on the way. Blair was hoping and praying with all of his might that these men wouldn't hurt his mate. He didn't even realize that he was chanting, "Jim, Jim, Jim."

"We'll find him, Sandy, don't you worry," Connor said trying to calm the man. 

Jim looked at Harper and leaned in closer to him. "The beer is spiked don't take a drink, Harp."

"Jim, we have to get out of here. I can't have them touch you or me. Fuck... Fuck..."

Whispering he said, "Harp, our backup will be here soon. Don't worry so much."

"Come on, men, let's go inside for some pictures." This was a new man and he easily picked Jim up and took him inside. Jim now knew why these men were so easily overtaken. "Hey, Harp, did you see the size of this guy? Jesus, I think he could lift you and carry you, too. Carry Harp and see if you can, dude," Jim was into the stage of the drug that made him giggle and act like an idiot. He did it so well, too. 

Harper wasn't going to make it easy. He fought them every step of the way. First of all he hadn't drunk the beer. Secondly, for some reason, Jim was totally out of it. He knew it was up to him to keep them safe. 

Jim was half naked lying on the floor and Harper lay on top of him and said, "Ellison, we have to get out of here."

"You don't understand; this is affecting me more than it should. I can't see or move right," Jim said in a panic. "Get out of here. Call for backup."

"I'm not fucking leaving you here." Harper stayed in a protective stance waiting what would come next. 

"Get the big one off of this one. We'll start with him. Put the tall one in the chains," one of the men said quietly but Harper heard him. So did Jim. 

"Shit, shit, shit..." Jim was trying to get control of his body, but he couldn't. 

It took four of the men to get Harper off of Jim's body. They chained him to a wall and one of them said, "Hang on and watch the fun we're going to have with him."

"Why not me? Leave him alone. Chicken shits!" Harper was trying to goad them into letting him loose. 

All five men were now moving over to Jim and starting to take his clothing off. Jim looked up and saw the strangers and he yelled, "Kelly, help me. Something's wrong, I can't move. Help me."

Harper's heart was breaking. _He'll never get over this shit..._

At that moment, the door was broken down and cops came storming in screaming, "Cascade Police, put your hands where we can see them. Now..."

Someone came and unlocked Harper and he went and got Jim dressed. Jim crawled into his arms and started shaking. "Could someone call me an ambulance? I think he's had a reaction to the drug they gave him."

"Simon came through the door and said, "There's an ambulance waiting now. Let's get him out there. He leaned down to help Jim up and Jim pulled away and moved closer to Harper. 

"Sir, it's nothing personal. It's the drug." Harper helped Jim up and got him loaded in the ambulance. Jim wouldn't let go of Harper's hand. Blair came running up and said, "Harper, I'll take over now."

"Okay. Hey, Jim, Blair's here. See you later, okay?"

"You promised you wouldn't leave me. You lied." Then Jim started to shake. Harper looked at Sandburg and said, "How about we meet you there?"

"Fine, see you there," Blair started walking back to Jim's truck and Simon caught up with him. 

"Sandburg, just remember that he's been given a strong drug. He's not himself." Simon hoped that would be enough. 

@@@@@

Once Blair arrived at the hospital, he found out where Jim was at and went and waited for someone to come and tell him how Jim was doing. Finally, tired of waiting, he walked down the row of examining rooms until he heard Jim. He stood there for a moment and heard Jim say, "You won't tell Blair, will you? He'll never forgive me."

"Jim, stop worrying, all right. We're fine and I'm not telling Blair a thing. Rest. The doctor said you need to sleep." As he walked out into the hallway, he saw Sandburg walking away quickly. "Sandburg, hold up."

Blair took off at a dead run. He almost made it to the pickup before Harper caught him. "What is your problem, Sandburg?"

"Oh fuck you. You never would have caught me if you didn't have those giant legs. I hate having fucking short legs."

"Blair, calm down and tell me what's wrong,"

"Did you fuck him or did he fuck you?"

"What? Where did you get that idea?"

I'm not an idiot. I overhead you and Jim talking about not telling me about it."

"I beg to differ, you are an idiot. Let me tell you what happened at the bar and you take it from there."

He proceeded to tell Blair about how they both got hard and they both had to jackoff in the bathroom to calm down some. 

"That's what he didn't want you to tell me?"

"He's afraid you'll be mad. Gee, I don't know where he got that idea from."

"Shut up with the snide remarks, will ya?"

"Wanna take that big lug home or you just gonna leave him here all night?" Harper slung his arm over Blair's shoulder as they walked up to the hospital. 

While Blair filled out the paperwork for Jim to go home, Harper called Meyer and asked him to meet him at the loft. 

Once Blair and Harper got Jim settled upstairs in bed, they walked downstairs to talk. Harper told Blair all about the bust and how it went down. Blair, in turn, told him about the backup van that wouldn't friggin' start. 

"I want to thank you for taking such good care of him. He's very precious, even if he doesn't seem like it sometimes," Blair smiled at the odd look on Harper's face. 

"I was only doing my job, Sandburg,"

Both men turned when there was a knock at the door. Harper opened it and stepped aside for Meyers to come in. 

"Hey, Meyers, good to see you. Sorry to talk and run, but I've got a man to take care of upstairs," Blair walked up the stairs and wondered if they were a major item or not. 

Harper locked up and led Meyers into the bedroom. "When are we going to get a place with a king sized bed?"

"I'm looking. Hell, I found one in this building. It's a little more than I had planned on paying though," Harper replied. 

"I wouldn't mind being your roommate." Meyers smiled as he began to kiss the taller man. 

Blair could hear the men downstairs getting busy, so he put his earphones on. He glanced over at Jim and saw him in the middle of a nightmare. He took the earphones off and all he heard was, "Harp, help me." Then he opened his eyes and stated it again. 

Blair walked down the stairs and knocked on the door and Harper opened the door a little bit and said, "This isn't the best time, Sandburg."

"Well excuse me, but my lover is upstairs asking for you." Blair turned and walked to the sofa, plopping down looking totally defeated. 

Harper walked upstairs and got Jim calm and back to sleep. Then he sat on the sofa and said, "It's the drug, Sandburg. You know he'd want you over me any day."

"I know. I'm just feeling sorry for myself," Blair just looked at the floor. 

The scream from upstairs scared both men, but Blair smiled because he was screaming, "Chief."

Blair rushed upstairs thinking, how sick is that to be happy he's screaming in the throes of a nightmare for me? Harper went back to bed. 

Meyers said as soon as Harper walked in, "Fuck me, big guy."

But Harper didn't fuck him; he made slow, sweet, passionate love to his mate. When they were done Harper pulled Meyers closer and said, "I love you. Will you move into that loft with me?"

"I love you, too, Harp. And yes, I'd love to move in."

In the morning, Blair made a nice breakfast for everyone. As they all sat around no one really talked and finally Blair said, "Geeze, you guys, you act like you fucked each other or something." Both Jim and Harper spit their coffee across the room. 

"What? Why ya looking at me like that?" Blair asked innocently. 

"You fucking told him, didn't you?" Jim growled at Harper. 

"Harp, you fucked him?" Meyers was totally lost and now very hurt. 

"No, I didn't fuck him. Jesus, you know I don't fuck anyone but you." Harp leaned into Mey and they began kissing. 

"Chief, I'm going to kick your ass,"

"Gotta catch me first," Blair took off running for the bedroom. 

"Hey, guys?" Harper yelled out. 

Jim leaned over the railing and said, "What? We're kind of busy."

"We're thinking about buying one of the lofts in this building. Would that bother you guys?"

"No, make sure and tell Mr. Norton that you're a friend of mine," Jim smiled down at him. 

"Oh! You think he'll give me a better deal?"

"No, he'll probably charge you more. Of course he'll probably give you a better deal. Do you always wake up this slow, Harp?"

"Yeah, he does." Meyers answered laughing. 

"We'll help you move. Just let us know when. Now, do you mind?"

"He is kind of cute, isn't he?" Harper said with a big smile on his face. 

A half naked Blair leaned over the railing and said, "Cute? I don't think so. Take that back, Harper."

"He doesn't like being called cute," Jim said trying not to laugh. 

Someone knocked loudly at the door and all anyone heard was Blair yelling, "Oh, what the fuck now?"

Jim laughed at his lover's outburst until he heard who was downstairs. "Fuck... Chief, stay here. It's Carolyn," Jim pulled his jeans on and got dressed in record time. 

"Hey Caro, what are you doing in town?" He walked over to her and she kissed him on the lips. Both Harper and Meyers stood there somewhat surprised. 

"I had to come for some work related things and figured, I'd spend time with one of my favorite people." Carolyn looked to see how he was dressed, "Honey, could you put on something a little nicer, I'm taking you to a fancy place for lunch?"

"Sure, I'll run up and change. Be right back," As soon as he got up there he started whispering to Blair, "I'm sorry, Chief. I'll try and make this brief." Jim leaned down and kissed his mate soundly before he left him again. 

Once downstairs, he said, "Caro, did you meet Harper and Meyers? They needed a place to stay for a few days, so they're here. Harper, Meyer, this is Carolyn Plummer, my ex-wife."

Carolyn shook hands with them and asked, "So where is Sandburg staying now?"

"Hey Caro, why don't we talk in the car?" Jim pushed her out the door. 

Not once had Jim thought to call Blair down and introduce him as his new love. And Blair was suffering the pain. He heard the front door close and he curled into a fetal position. 

He heard footsteps coming up the stairs and rolled his eyes, knowing they were going to bug him. 

"Hey, Blair! Come on, get up. We're going to take you out," Meyers ordered. 

"Guys, I'm fine. Really. I just want to rest and forget about it all," Blair pulled the comforter up and covered himself to get warmer. 

"Nah, it's time to get up, hot shot. Let's go out to lunch. Your choice," Harper pulled him up with one arm and had him out of bed. 

Blair looked over at Meyers and said, "Do you ever feel like he could just break you like a twig?"

"Hell yes, but thankfully, he's a gentle guy. Now let's get ready. Where are we going anyhow?"

"I want to go where they went," Blair smiled as he said it. 

"Well, I just happen to know where they're going because I asked. Dress nice, young man." Harper started down the stairs, laughing, knowing this might be fun... or it might be a nightmare. 

They all dressed silently, thinking about what could possibly happen and left in one vehicle. 

@@@@@

"So tell me, Harp, is it something about you big guys having to have big trucks?"

"Sandburg you've asked me this before. It wasn't funny then it still isn't." Harper drove quietly from then on. 

"Hey! Guys, if you're nervous we can go somewhere else," Blair wanted to give them an out. 

"Okay, that's probably a good idea," Meyers said. 

"Why?" Blair asked. 

"Because we don't know what we're going to come across and it might not make you happy," Harper tried to explain. 

"Oh so, if he's fucking his wife at the restaurant, then it's best that I just not see it?"

"No, not exactly. Blair, it was a dumb idea," Harper was totally pissed at himself for starting all of this. 

"I want to go. So we're going," Blair commanded and knew that they would do it. 

@@@@@

Once they got there, Meyers went to see where Jim and Carolyn were. Once he found out they got the booth behind them. 

Blair whispered, "Let's keep our voices down and he won't even know we're here," He smiled as he unfolded the napkin and put it in his lap. 

So Harper and Meyers did exactly that. They all spoke in a whisper, even when they ordered and listened for some type of talk from Jim. 

Finally it came to them, "Jimmy, after lunch you can come to my hotel and stay the night."

"Caro, I'm flattered, but I'm seeing someone right now. I don't think it would be very nice," Jim spoke quickly so she would understand. 

Then the three men heard her slide over to his side and kiss him. Then they could hear her unzipping his pants. 

"Caro, come on. I don't want this. I don't want to hurt you, but I don't fuck around on him," as soon as he said it he knew he was fucked. 

"Him? Him? Oh my god, you're fucking a guy?"

"Caro, could you keep your voice down? It's not just a guy; it's Blair. I love him with all of my heart. Please don't be ugly to him." Jim didn't want his lover and ex-wife to hate each other. 

Carolyn wasn't going to give up that easily. "Jimmy, kiss me like you used to when you loved me."

She pulled him down and began to kiss him with much need and passion. Jim tried to pull away but he was getting swept up in the old feeling of being with his wife. Caro moved her hand down and started stroking Jim's cock through his slacks and Jim was moaning into her mouth. 

"Well, isn't this cozy?" Blair stood there tapping one foot and glaring at Jim. 

"Chief, it's not what you think it is," Jim tried to get himself back together so he could get up. 

"Jim, you're an asshole and you'll have to answer to me at home. Caro, you're a fucking bitch. He just told you he loved me and you still tried to get down his pants. That's fucking low. Real fucking low. Jim, I'll see you at home and we'll decide what we're going to do." Blair turned on his heels and stormed out of the place, leaving the bill for Harper to take care of. 

Harper paid and then went back and said, "Jim, move your ass now."

Jim got up, threw cash on the table and said, "Sorry, Caro, I told you I was with someone. I gotta go or this big one is going to kick my ass." He smiled and practically ran out of the place and opened the door and pulled Blair out. He sat down and pulled Blair onto his lap. Meyers made this the quickest ride home in history. 

@@@@@

"Lady, and I use that term loosely, you have no morals at all. That man is like so in love with Ellison it isn't even funny. Ellison is happy, wouldn't you want him to be happy?" Harper stood looking down at her in the booth. 

"Oh what do you know? He was my husband. How is that going to look to people?" Carolyn spat out. 

"Carolyn, it's time to move on. Leave Ellison alone. He loves you as a friend, but he has a new love. Allow him that. Now good day," Harper walked quickly out of the restaurant before Carolyn attacked him. _She's a mean bitch._

@@@@@

Blair opened the door and yanked Jim out. "Up those stairs, big man. I'm going to teach you a few things."

"I love you, Babe," Jim said before he took two stairs at a time and opened the loft door. 

Blair turned to Meyer and said, "You better go and get Harper before he kills Carolyn."

Meyes did exactly that and came back with Harper following close behind. 

Blair said, “Did you have to get ugly with Carolyn?”

"Nah, I told Jim to get his ass out to the truck and I just told her what I thought." Harper slung an arm over Meyers as they walked into the room. 

"Oh god, I love it. I love when someone bosses him besides me. He thinks he's all tough," Blair smiled as he looked at the two men walking beside him, "thanks guys for everything."

"No problem, now go and teach him something," Meyers laughed. 

"In fact, we're going to leave for awhile. Talk to you later." Harper pulled Meyers close and off they went. 

Blair walked into the loft and heard, "Chief, you coming up?"

"Well, DUH! Of course I'm coming up," Blair yelled up as he got a piece of paper out. "I have to write a quick note for the door."

Blair looked up and saw a very naked and ready man waiting for him. "I'll be right up, big man,"

Blair wrote the sign and posted it on the door. Then he walked up stairs to his lovers waiting arms. 

The sign said:

**There's nobody here, there's no one at home.  
So please go away and leave us alone. **

 

The end


	3. Needing Sandburg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blair is accused of doing something horrible. Can Jim live with this news? Can Blair?
> 
> WARNING!!!!!! Non/con and discussion of it.

Needing Sandburg  
By Patt

Summary:   
WARNING!!!!!! Non/con and discussion of it. 

Blair is accused of doing something horrible. Can Jim live with this news? Can Blair?

 

 **Day 1**

Jim, Blair, Harper and Meyers met at Silver Dollar Steakhouse. After they were done eating Harper said, "We're both going undercover." 

"Is it at least somewhere exciting? Somewhere warm?" Blair wondered how much he could ask about an undercover assignment. 

"Nice try, Sandburg, but I can't tell you," Harper said with a smile in his voice. 

The two men got up to leave and Meyers shook hands with both of them. But Harper kissed Jim on the mouth and Blair stood there in shock. Jim finally pulled back and said, "Come back to all of us safe and sound." 

On their way home, Blair was upset about the kiss from Harper. "So what's up with Harp? You two kissing buddies now?" 

"Chief, I don't know what he was doing. I don't kiss him. Well, not unless we're undercover or something," Jim tried to explain without sounding pitiful. 

"Okay, I'll believe you this time." Blair got out of the truck not really listening to Jim anymore. 

"I'll talk to him when he gets back. I don't want him to do that any more, Chief." 

"Don't worry, he won't," Blair said quietly. But it was loud enough for Jim to hear and wonder about. 

**Day 4**

Jim and Blair were in bed sleeping when someone pounded on the front door. "I'll get it, Chief." Jim got out of bed and made his way down the stairs. Pulling open the door, he was shocked to see some type of federal officers standing there. 

"Are you Detective Blair Sandburg?" the lead man asked. 

"No, I'm Detective Ellison. What's this about?" 

"I'm Agent Samuel Simms. I'm FBI and we need to take Detective Sandburg in for questioning. 

"What's going on, man?" Blair asked as he descended the stairs wearing only blue jeans and socks. 

"Detective Blair Sandburg?" Agent Simms asked. 

"Yeah, that's me. What's going on?" 

"We're here to take you in for questioning about the murder of one Detective Kelly Harper." Simms watched the young man's face to see what he was going to do. 

One of the younger agents turned Blair around and patted him down before he put the cuffs on him. 

"This is bullshit. Harper's our friend." Jim was trying to take Blair away from the agent. 

"Detective Ellison, you must step back and let us do our job. Get him a good lawyer," Simms continued. 

"Let me get the rest of his clothes. You can't take him in like that," Jim ran up the stairs to grab all of Blair's clothing and his shoes. _Oh god, what's going on?_

He helped Blair get his clothes on under the FBI's watchful eyes. This time of year, Blair couldn't be going out without a shirt and shoes. It was so damn damp and cold. Sometimes Jim hated the fall. This was one of those times. 

"Chief, I'll meet you down there. Don't worry about a thing and don't say a word." 

"Sure..." Blair walked with slumped shoulders as he exited the loft. Jim's heart broke into a million pieces. He called Simon first and then he called everyone else in Major Crime because they would all help Blair get through this. Next he called his dad's lawyer and was told he would meet him there in an hour. 

@@@@@

When Jim got there Agent Simms pulled him aside and said, "It doesn't look good, Ellison. I hope you got a decent lawyer for him." 

"An attorney will be here in an hour. That's as soon as he could make it." Jim paced as he watched what was going on in the interrogation room. 

One of the other agents decided to ask some questions. "Sandburg, my name is Agent Willis and Harper worked for us. We'd like to know why you felt the need to get rid of him." 

Without batting an eye, he answered, "He wouldn't stop touching Jim." 

Jim stood there in shock when he realized that Blair might have actually done it. 

"Your partner said you were with him all night long. Are you saying he lied?" Willis asked. 

"He didn't lie, Jim never lies. I took care of business before I came home. So I was with him all night after I did the deed." Blair looked through the two-way mirror and looked sadly at Jim. He mouthed out, "I'm sorry, Jim. I'll never be able to make this up to you." 

Rafe, Connor, Joel and Brown stood next to him in shock. "No way. No way would Sandy do that. Something's going on." Connor started doing her imitation of the Sandburg pace. 

"I totally agree with her." Joel looked at Jim to see how he was taking this. 

"Jim, don't worry, we'll figure it all out." Brown touched Jim gently on the shoulder and had Jim pull away, walk over and sit down at his desk. God, how could he have done that? It's not possible. He got back up and asked Simms if he could talk to his partner. 

"Sorry, Ellison, but he admitted to everything and said he doesn't want to see anyone." Willis started to walk away from him. 

Jim grabbed him and said, "Please? I have to see him." 

"Fine, stay here for a minute." Simms walked in and got Willis out and opened the door for Jim. The bullpen gang was still watching through the two-way mirror.

"Chief..." 

Blair jumped up and went into Jim's arms and held on for dear life. "I'm sorry, Jim. I'm sorry." 

"Chief, I love you. I'd forgive you for anything." Jim kissed him deeply and Blair shivered. "Did you do this?" 

"Yes. I told you he wasn't going to touch you again. And I don't want to see you at the prison," Blair said quietly. 

"I can't go without seeing you, babe. You know that." Jim smiled down into the tear stained face. 

"You don't have any choice, Jim. I already told them the price for my admission of guilt is that they keep you away from the prison," Blair explained as best as he could to the distressed man. 

"Jesus, I can't do this, Chief." Jim pulled him in closer and just held on for dear life. 

Blair moved away from him and said, "You don't have a choice, Jim. Always remember that I love you." 

He walked to the doorway where Willis and Simms were standing, waiting for him. 

When Jim came walking out of the room Simon was waiting. "Come on, Jim. I want to talk to you. Go sit down, I'll be there in a moment." 

Jim walked silently to Simon's office in a daze. Simon turned to Connor and said, "Go to your house and pack a bag for at least a week. Everything you'll need. I want you to stay with Ellison. We can't have him biting a bullet." 

"Yes, sir. I'll go get it done and get back." Connor started to leave the room and he grabbed her hand and slipped a key in it. 

"Go right to his loft. He'll be home soon." Simon walked back into his office and saw a shocked and scared man. "Jim, why don't you go home and we'll talk tomorrow if you feel like it." Simon saw that Jim wasn't up to chatting about anything. 

"Tell me there was a mistake, Simon. Tell me that Blair didn't do that." 

"I can't because it would be a lie. They even have a witness. I'm sorry, Jim." Simon patted Jim on the back on the way to the door. 

Jim walked out of the room. Everyone stood to the side and didn't try and bother him, except for Joel. "Jim, don't you find it odd that he admitted his guilt so quickly? I don't believe he did it." 

"Well, I just asked Simon, who would know if something was wrong, and he said there was even a witness." 

"I still don't believe it, Jim." Joel pulled Jim into a hug, but Jim pulled out of it. 

"Sorry, Joel, I just want to go home. Thanks for everything." Jim calmly walked out of the station and Joel had a feeling they'd never see Jim Ellison again. A sadness came over the large man and he had to sit down. 

"He'll be all right, Joel. We'll take care of him." Rafe tried to calm Joel down. 

"You don't understand. He's never going to be all right again. Blair's his life. I can't believe this shit." Joel stormed off into Simon's office. 

While the two men talked, there was a knock on Simon's door. Simon opened it for two feds. "What?" 

"We needed to tell you that since this was an undercover assignment, and we don't want to blow it, we went before a judge with his admission of guilt and we're taking him to prison right now. It's Federal and the time is 12 to 20 years," Willis got it out as quickly as he could. 

"What the hell is wrong with you? Ellison will need to see him before he goes to prison." Joel was standing very close to the man and yelling in his face. 

"Sorry. We're leaving now. It's how Sandburg wanted it." Simms got up and left the room with Willis close behind. 

*** 

Simon called the loft and heard, "Connor." 

"Connor, I need Jim to know what's going on here at the station. So could you have him call me as soon as possible?" Simon was being way too nice. 

"So tell me and I'll give him the message." Connor wasn't going to back down. 

"The entire thing is over with. There was a witness, Blair admitted his guilt and it's a federal crime, so Blair left tonight after seeing a judge. They gave him 12 to 20 years." Simon knew she was going to be upset. 

"I'll talk to him as soon as possible. Thanks for telling me, Captain." Connor hung the phone up with a heavy heart. 

@@@@@

Jim arrived home and didn't really even remember driving there. He knew that he might be in trouble, but he didn't care. His reason for living was going away. He opened up the door to the loft and Connor was standing there in the kitchen, making dinner. 

 

"Get the fuck out of my home. You weren't invited. I'll give you five seconds to get your ass out of that kitchen and out of my loft. NOW!" 

Megan Connor just stood there looking at him, daring him to put a hand on her. She knew how to take care of herself, she just hoped she'd never have to use anything against one of her co-workers. 

Jim raised the level of his voice and yelled again, "I said get out. Now." 

She continued to cook and ignored his yelling. She looked over at him and saw one of the saddest men she'd ever seen in her life. "So, Jim, are you hungry yet?" 

Jim opened his mouth and nothing came out. Instead, he turned and rushed up the staircase and Connor heard him sit on the bed. She walked slowly up the stairs hoping not to see anything she didn't want to. 

Jim was lying on the bed in a fetal position. Connor moved up behind him, rubbed his back and talked soothingly. She filled him in on what Simon had said. She could feel him shaking, but there was no noise. She thought this was just 'so' Jim Ellison. She talked to him and continued to rub his back until he was asleep. Once she was sure he was sleeping soundly, she took his gun out of his holster and she went down stairs. 

The phone rang and she picked it up, saying, "Connor." 

"How is he?" Simon wondered. 

"As good as can be expected, sir. I think this is the worst thing that could ever happen to Jim. He knows what happens to people in prison. Now his love will be there. Jesus, Simon, I can't believe you let this go. We should have fought more." Connor was sitting on the floor by that time with big tears rolling down her face. 

"Take good care of him, Connor." 

"Like you have to tell me that, sir." Connor hung the phone up without even saying goodbye. 

She put all the food away and got ready for bed herself. She then got Jim up and got him undressed and they went to bed together. Jim gladly went into her arms and was able to sleep. 

Connor fell asleep saying, "Things will get better, Jim, I promise." And they did, slowly but surely. Nobody ever said it was going to be easy. 

@@@@@

"New meat. Just what we love to see." A big ugly man reached for Sandburg. Blair's stomach turned at the thought of that man taking him. "You're going to get fucked, Sandburg." 

"Get away from him; he's mine already," a loud voice boomed across the showers. 

"We didn't see you take him, so he isn't yours until someone sees it," the ugly man continued. 

"Come here. Don't fight me, or it will take longer." He started to loosen Blair up and then without so much as a warning, he thrust his cock into Blair's ass. He wasn't doing it savagely. He just wasn't Jim. Blair started to cry in earnest now. Under his breath the man fucking him could hear, "I'm so sorry, Jim. I know you'll never forgive me." 

@@@@@

**Day 6**

Connor woke up and found Jim out of bed already. She walked downstairs and noticed his gun was out of his holster. "Oh fuck," she flew into the bathroom and Jim had the gun up under his chin. 

"Ellison, give me that. Promise me you won't do this again." 

"I can't do that, Connor," Jim said, head hanging. 

"And who's going to take care of Sandy when he gets out? Are you just giving up on him? Don't you love him anymore?" Connor was pushing all of his buttons. 

"I'll try, Connor. That's all I can do." Jim pulled her into his arms and they both held on for dear life. Jim wasn't even going to tell her that he was just about to pull that trigger when she opened up the door. If not for her, he would be dead. 

Connor called and made an appointment for both of them with a therapist. She needed one just to know how to handle him. He needed help in the worst way, but mostly because she knew she would be lost without her mate. Good mates were hard to come by. 

After making the phone call she called out, "Ellison?" 

"What do you want, Connor? I don't want to talk about it any more today." 

"We've got an appointment with a therapist before work, so get the lead out." 

"I'm not going to any therapist," Jim bellowed. 

"Fine. I'll tell Simon all about you trying to eat your gun and we'll go from there." Connor knew he would give in. 

"Fine. Fuck! I can never win an argument. I never won with Sandburg and now I can't win with you," Jim growled as he began getting dressed. 

"Damn straight, mate," Connor said, smiling. 

"I'm not straight...." Jim laughed at the look on her face. 

"Come on, let's get this over with," Jim said, holding the door for Connor. 

@@@@@

 **Day 14**

It was Sandburg's birthday. Jim didn't believe that things could get any worse. He was watching television with Connor, talking and trying to pretend that nothing mattered. But things did matter and he couldn't do it anymore. He got up and walked towards the bathroom and Connor asked, "Where you going, Jim?" 

"Is it all right if I take a piss? Geeze," and he shut himself into the bathroom. He had hidden his spare gun in the bathroom cabinet, but when he opened it up, the gun was gone. He stormed out of the bathroom and said, "Where is it?" 

"Jim, talk to me. What's wrong?" Connor was begging. 

"I should be allowed to end my life if I want to. God, I can't do this, Connor. I can't fucking do it," Jim said, sadly. 

"Jim, what brought this on? Tell me, please?" 

"It's his birthday. Did you know that?" Jim asked sadly. 

"Oh god, come here, Jim. Let me hold you." She pulled him down to the couch and held him tight. 

"Connor, this isn't going to work. I need to be alone. I want to be alone. I can't even jack-off because I know you'll come walking into the bathroom. I need privacy." Jim tried not to be cruel but he wanted to be alone. 

"I'm not leaving you, Jim. You can hit me. You can hate me. You can yell at me, but I'm not leaving. I love you, mate, and I'm keeping you alive for Sandy." Then she started crying as she continued to hold him. 

"Let's go to bed, come on." Jim led the way upstairs and they fell into a troubled sleep. But at least they had made it into another day. 

@@@@@

 **Day 20**

Each day at the station got a little easier for Jim, too. Things would never be the same, but they were easier. He missed Blair and vowed to see him if it killed both of them. 

Jim went into Simon's office and said, "Simon, I need a week off. I'm going to go camping. And no, you don't need to send Connor with me. I'm getting sick of her, if you want to know the truth." 

"The only way I'll let you go is if she goes with you." Simon was standing his ground. 

"Fine, can we both have time off?" 

"Yes, I think that would be a good idea. You'll come back rested and relaxed." Simon puffed on his cigar and smiled at Jim. 

"Thanks, Simon. We'll leave tomorrow." Jim walked out of the office and went to find Connor. 

"Heads up, Connor, we're on vacation," Jim said, smiling, as he walked by her desk. 

"Excuse me? Does someone need to ask me if I want to go?" 

Leaning in to whisper, Jim said, "I'm going to check on Blair." 

"Well, why didn't you say so? Where are we going, Jim?" Connor grabbed some things and was on the lift as soon as Jim was. 

"Tonight, we're going to a bar where I know some of the guards from the prison hang out. I contacted one of them and he said he'd talk to me then." Jim seemed excited to be able to find something out for a change. 

"Good, I'm ready." Connor was more than ready to find out some details about Sandy. 

"It's a fairly nice bar and has first-rate food, so I figured we could eat there." 

"Sounds good to me, Ellison." Megan smiled at his enthusiasm. 

Once they arrived, they sat in a booth and ordered dinner. Jim had a little bit of a buzz from the beer but didn't mind because he had asked Connor if she would drive home. 

A man walked up to the table and said, "Mind if I join you, pretty lady?" 

Jim smiled and said, "Connor, this is Miller. Miller, my new partner, Connor." 

Connor slid over so the man could sit down. "Good to meet you, Miller. Are you watching out for our Sandburg?" Connor thought she would get right down to business. 

"Well, I have to tell ya, I didn't think he'd make it very long. Him being a cop didn't help things, but he's got someone taking care of him, Ellison. So he's doing pretty well. He's huge, the guy, I mean. He fights them off really well and I do believe that Sandburg's becoming attached to him." Miller eyed Jim to see if this was good or bad news. 

Jim tried to stay calm. "Are you sure he's taking care of him? Or maybe it just looks like it?" 

"No, he's taking care of him. I walked in on them in the shower and he was being really gentle and your partner didn't seem to mind at all," Miller informed him of this not realizing that Jim and Blair were indeed partners. "That's why it's good for a change, Ellison. This guy is treating him really well. I just left them alone." 

"Can you do me a favor?" Jim asked softly and sadly. 

"Sure, Ellison. You know I owe you more than one." Miller sat and waited for the favor to be asked. 

"I know I can't see Sandburg but could you fix it so that I see his caretaker? I need to see if he needs anything." Jim was still speaking so softly that Connor and Miller could hardly hear him. 

"Yeah, I can do that, but not for two weeks since I'm on vacation. So we'll do it then. All right?" 

"Okay, we'll be there in two weeks. Thanks again, Miller." Jim got up and made his way to the truck and he sat in the passenger side. Connor took the keys from Jim and drove home quickly. She kept looking over at Jim, but didn't see any changes that she could pinpoint. Ellison's walls were up. 

Once they were in the loft, she closed and locked the door and Jim went down on his hands and knees and then started to sob. "Jesus, Connor. He's someone else's now. I knew it would happen but I prayed it wouldn't. What am I going to do?" 

"We're going to wait the two weeks and then we're going to go and check him out. We'll ask if we can do anything for our Sandy and we'll pray that he keeps him safe for all of us," Jim looked up and saw that Connor was crying, too. 

And this is exactly what they would do. They knew they had to just wait and see what would happen. 

"We've got the week off, Jim. Let's go camping and try to forget our life," Connor suggested very quietly. 

"I don't know how to break it to you, but this isn't your life," Jim spat out angrily. 

"You're right. I'm sorry," Connor walked into the office and lay down on the futon. 

"I'm sorry. Come on, we'll pack and go camping. We'll both try to forget real life." Jim pulled Connor up and they began to pack for a much needed vacation. 

@@@@@

 **Day 23**

Jim lay in his sleeping bag, next to Connor's in the tent and just stared at her. He was indeed a lucky man. First, he had Blair, and now he had Connor, looking out for him. They could never be in love but she loved him in a special way. And Jim loved her right back. She was the only thing keeping him alive right now. 

Connor woke feeling like someone was watching her and saw Jim staring at her. "You okay, Jim?" 

"Yeah, I was just thinking about how lucky I am to have you in my life." Jim smiled shyly at her. 

"Mr. Ellison, I swear, what a wonderful compliment. What's going on?" 

Jim looked around like mad and said, "Where's my father?" 

They both laughed and then Jim seriously said, "I've never told you this, but I love you." 

Moving closer to Jim she got into his arms and said, "I love you back. You're my best mate." 

"Connor, this was a good idea. I feel more relaxed than I have in ages. Thanks for pushing me sometimes." Jim slid his arm under her neck and said, "Wanna get some sleep now?" 

For the next few days, they slept and fished and just had a good time telling stories. And Jim was right; it was a good idea. He needed that time away. Their poignant Blair stories were their favorite part of the excursion. 

@@@@@

 **Day 30**

"Do you have a report, Sandburg?" Simms asked. 

"Yes, sir, it's all here. Can you get me out soon?" Sandburg whispered. 

"As soon as I can," Simms whispered back. 

"This place is killing me. I need to get out, sir," Blair demanded. 

"Sandburg, you don't give me orders, I give you orders. You'll get out as soon as we can get you out." Simms walked away and Blair hoped it would be soon. 

He went quietly back to his bunk, which he was supposed to be in already, and crawled in with the man on the bottom and cried. He had been strong this entire time, but now that he was getting close, he was getting scared. The large man held him and whispered sweet things to him. Blair once again talked about Jim and noiselessly cried some more. 

@@@@@

 **Day 35**

Jim and Connor took the day off. Simon didn't even ask anymore. He figured if she could just keep Jim going they would be all right. 

The drive up to the prison was quiet. Both of them were very nervous. Jim met his contact there and he got them into the visitation room. Jim would have to talk to him through the glass and a telephone but it was better than nothing. Jim needed to see that this person was taking care of his lover. _Not anymore, Ellison._ Connor stayed in the waiting room for Jim to return with news. 

Prisoner number 5291 was called to the visitor's room and he walked up there confused. He had no one to visit him, but maybe it would be something good. Who was he to bitch? 

Miller walked up to Ellison and said, "Kellen is on his way out. He's a nice guy. He's good to Sandburg." 

The door opened and 5291 walked up to the window and his mouth fell open. So did Jim's. Then he lifted his finger to his lips as in don't say a word. He sat down and picked up the telephone. 

"What can I do ya for?" the prisoner asked smugly. 

"Jesus Christ... Oh fuck..." Jim couldn't seem to form a sentence. 

"Hey, jerk! You're the one that wanted to see me. So either talk or I'll leave." The prisoner was getting agitated. 

"What can I call you?" 

"Kellen, that's my name." 

"So, Kellen, I hear you're taking care of Sandburg?" 

"You hear right. He's dandy. He's very sweet in the sack, too, not to mention how nice he is on the eyes." Kellen loved putting on a show for the guards. 

Jim couldn't help it, a single tear fell down his face. 

"Cop, no need to cry, he's fine. Now speaking of that, I have to go and watch my property." Kellen walked away from the glass and looked back and winked at Jim. 

Jim got up and almost flew out of the room. He grabbed Connor and they got to the truck in record time. 

"What? What's happening? Something's up; tell me." Connor wouldn't let him start the truck without telling her. 

"Connor, his bunkmate, and so called guardian, is none other than Harper." Jim watched the look on Connor's face and finally she broke into a huge grin and said, "Holy shit, they're a plant. They must be undercover?" 

"I would say, Blair, Harper and maybe Meyers are all undercover." Jim hugged Megan and just hung on for a while. 

"Why this long, Jim? Did Simon know about this?" 

"That's who we'll visit next. I want to fucking kill him but then we'd be separated again. Can't have that. God, I can't believe this." Jim started the truck for the drive home. 

@@@@@

They went to the loft and decided they'd wait till the morning. Maybe by then one of them would think of what to say to Simon that didn't include 'fucking prick'. 

"Jim, you do realize who the man is that made love to him, right?" 

"Yeah, I know it was Harper. He probably saved him from being gang banged, so I should be grateful," Jim said softly, as he sat on the couch. 

"But are you?" 

"What? Am I what?" 

"Are you grateful that Sandy was taken by someone you know and call a friend?" 

"No..." Jim wiped a tear as it slid down his face. 

"Talk to me. I'm here for you." Connor sat next to him and slid her arms around him. 

"I can't stand the thought that he fucked Blair. What can I say? I don't like sharing. And now each time I see Harper I'll know that he had his dick in Blair." 

"Hell! I think we're all going to need therapy after this, Jim, so things will get better. Please don't be mad at Sandy," Connor pleaded. 

"I'm not mad at Blair. I'm so grateful to have him coming home, I don't care about anything. I love him to death." Jim then got up from the couch and said, "Wanna sleep with me. I could use a friend." 

Connor did sleep with Jim again, thinking he would need it. She was right. He had small nightmares all night long. 

In the morning, they both decided to wait for two days, to talk to Simon. Just in case Blair was out of there by then. They could dream. 

@@@@@

 **Day 36**

Meyers came and got Sandburg and Harper and took them to the infirmary. There all of their clothing was waiting and they were briefed on what happened with the information they had given them, and who was going down. It had been a good bust. They took care of two guards, six cons and the warden. The three men walked out the front door and a car was waiting for them. 

Blair could feel the happiness starting to seep back into his body. Now if Jim ever forgave him for this, he would have it made. 

@@@@@

The three men remained silent until they pulled up to a motel near the prison. "What are you doing? We're supposed to go home," Blair reminded Simms. 

"Willis is meeting us here; he needs to debrief you all some more. You'll be home in a couple of days. No contact until then. Understood?" Simms ordered. 

"Yes, sir," all three of the men said. 

When they got there, they put the three men in the same room and told them to make no calls or leave the room. 

"What's up with this shit?" Blair asked Harper. 

"Hell, if I know, but they probably have the room wired, so let's just do what they want." Harper lay back on the bed happy to be able to just look at his love. 

"Knock it off, damn you!" Meyers voice dripped venom as he spoke. 

"I can sit in the bathroom if you want privacy," Blair offered. 

"No need, Sandburg. What's up, Mey?" Harper stood up next to him and Meyers punched him right in the stomach. 

"I'm not discussing this with the feds listening. We'll wait till we're home." Meyers looked over at Harper and both men knew he was thinking about it. 

Blair looked over at his friend and realized this was going to take forever. Blair knew this was his fault. 

"Okay, I changed my mind. I want to discuss it now. I want to know why you fucked him like that," Meyers stated coldly. 

"Like what?" Harper asked as he looked over at Sandburg, who was going into a fetal position. 

"Like he was the most wonderful thing in the world. You've never fucked me that gently." Mey had tears in his eyes. 

"Okay, first off, this is a size thing. Mey, you're 6' 2" and I don't really worry about hurting you but Sandburg is 5' 7" and I felt like I would break him." Harper looked at Meyers to see if he was paying attention. 

"Bullshit, Harp. You could be rough with him if you wanted to. I think you don't love me. Did you go and fall in love with Sandburg while you were in there? How many times did you fuck him?" 

"Mey, I love you. I always have. So don't accuse me of not loving you. And no I didn't fall in love with Sandburg. Hell! He's so into Ellison, there'd be no room for me. I love you, babe, and if I never showed you gentle, then I'll change my ways, okay?" Harper got up and pulled Meyers into his arms. 

"Did you fuck him every night, Harp?" Mey asked with tears rolling down his face. 

"No. We did it once to show the guys he was mine. That was all. We've never done it since." Harper held on to his lover gently to see how Mey liked the gentle part. 

"I'm sorry, Mey," Sandburg said so quietly that Meyers almost didn't here him. 

Meyers got on the bed next to Blair and held him and said, "I'm sorry for all of this. I was jealous. I'm an ass." 

"I'll have to deal with the same things when I see Jim. Jim might not even want me any more." Blair was so sad that Harper joined them on the bed. 

"Hey, I wasn't going to say anything, but he saw me yesterday," Harper said with a smile on his face. 

"Jim was at the prison?" 

"Yeah, someone told him you were a kept man and he wanted to see who I was and see if there was anything he could do. Imagine his surprise when he saw me walk out there." Harper tried not to laugh. 

"See, Sandburg, he didn't want to just forget about you," Meyers said hugging him and getting up. 

"Man, I can't believe this. He came to the prison. He does love me," Blair just beamed. 

Meyer and Harper both said, "Duh." 

"Mey, are you okay about things now?" Harper asked quickly. 

"No, but I will be. Give me some time. I'm not mad. I'm just hurt. See, Sandburg got it first. I've never had it and I'll be second," Meyers tried to explain to his love. 

"I wasn't making love to him, Mey. I was fucking him." Harper tried to pull him into his arms. 

"Well, you've never fucked me like that." Mey watched Harper's face for his reaction. 

"You're right, I never have. But that's because I get real into it with you. I love you, Mey. Fucking you is one of the best things in my life. I can't stand the thought of being without you," Harper crushed the man to his chest. 

Meyer brought his arms around Harper and held on like there was no tomorrow. "I love you too, Harp. I adore you." 

Sandburg had wandered into the bathroom and couldn't help thinking about this entire thing happening to him and Jim soon. Blair found himself getting nervous about that. 

"So you think you'll forgive me?" Harper leaned down to Meyers face and kissed him. 

"Yeah, you're forgiven, but don't expect me to be happy when Jim Ellison tries to kick your ass." 

"So true." Harper knew that he was going to have to let Ellison do it to make him feel better about himself.

@@@@@ 

**Day 37**

"Simon, you have a minute?" Jim stood in the doorway waiting for an answer. 

"I've always got time for you. What's up?" 

"Guess who I saw two days ago?" Jim just sat back and waited to see if Simon squirmed. 

"Who?" Simon looked and acted like he really didn't know. 

"Harper. And fuck if he isn't alive. Isn't that the balls?" Jim could do sarcasm with the best of them. 

Simon stood up and said, "Jim, I couldn't say a word. It was top secret. I wanted to tell you. I thought you should have been told but those fucking feds suck." 

"Simon, I was thinking about killing myself. What would you have done then?" 

"Why do you think Connor's been by your side since day one? I couldn't take that chance. I knew she would mother you to death. I was right." Simon was waiting to see if Jim was going to punch him out. 

"Did it ever occur to you that I needed to know? Fuck rules! I was very hurt by this, Simon, and I don't know if I want to work here anymore." Jim stood by the door ready to leave. 

"I can tell you where he is right now, Jim. I talked to him last night and he misses you a lot." Simon was handing him a peace offering. 

"Where is he?" 

"Still being debriefed at the motel right next to the prison. Maybe they'll let you pick him up." Simon pushed Jim out of his office. 

"This doesn't make us close to being even, Simon." Jim walked through the bullpen with a large smile on his face. He might be pissed off at Simon but he was on his way to see Sandburg. 

Connor said, "Partner, I'll meet you in the garage. I'll just be a few minutes." 

"Okay. Hurry it up, I'm a man on a mission." Jim laughed all the way to the stairs. 

Connor knocked on Simon's door and walked in. 

"What can I do for you, Connor?" 

"You're a bastard, Captain, and I'll never forgive you. What if he would have died on my shift? He tried to eat his gun a few times. I would have died along with him but you were only worried about the Feds. You're an asshole and I'll never have respect for you again." 

She turned and walked out of his office but then she turned back around and walked back in. Simon was in front of the door and asked, "Ready to apologize already, Connor?" 

She drew her arm back and punched him as hard as she could. Joel came running and said, "Connor, what are you doing?" 

"It's all right, Joel. I said something crappy to her. Get out of here, Connor, before I throw you in a cell." Simon slammed his door and sat down. _God, she hits hard for a woman. Hell! She hits hard for a guy._

@@@@@

Jim and Connor drove as quickly as they could to the motel by the prison "Connor, do we have to do everything together? I mean, the scary part is over now." 

"Simon told me I have to be with you at all times. You're stuck with me, big fella." Connor slugged him as she laughed. 

Jim glanced over at his partner and saw she was rubbing her hand and knuckles. Then he saw the bruising that was starting to show. "All right, Connor. Who did you have a fight with? I can see the bruised knuckles." 

"It's none of your business, Ellison. It was personal." 

Jim pulled over to the side of the road, looked at her and said, "Please tell me you didn't hit Simon?" 

"Okay." 

"Okay, what?" Jim asked. 

"Okay, I won't tell you." Connor continued to stare out the window. 

"Connor, what were you thinking?" 

"I wasn't. I was pissed off, Jim. You almost ate your gun more than once and what if I would have missed that? I would have fucking died. I kid you not, I would have just died, rather than tell Sandy that I fell down on the job. So the asshole put us all under pressure just because the Feds said so. I don't buy that. He breaks rules when he wants to, why not this time?" 

Jim gave her a hug and said, "So are you suspended?" 

"No, he's guilty. He let me get back to work, but everyone in the office is shocked. You should have seen Joel's face, Jim." Connor was beaming. 

"Well, knock it off, Connor. I can take care of myself." 

"I know that. I wasn't saying you couldn't. I was taking care of myself." Connor pushed him over to the steering wheel and said, "Come on, I want to see Sandy." 

Once in the parking lot, the Feds were all over them. "Hold it, Ellison and Connor," Simms said. 

"What? I've got every right to see him," Jim said, trying to get to the door. 

"There's been some complications with the case and we need all three of them to stay here until we get it taken care of." Willis decided to give Ellison some information, "It might take another couple of days." 

"At least let me say hello to him," Jim pleaded. 

"Sorry, Ellison, you can't see any of them," Simms stated as he opened Jim's truck door. 

"Chief, I'll be waiting for you when you're done," Jim screamed as loud as he could. 

Jim saw the drapes opening a small bit and he could see Blair's eyes watching him. 

"I'll see you soon, big man," Blair whispered from the room. 

Smiling, Jim and Connor got into the truck and drove back to Cascade. 

@@@@@

Willis and Simms knocked on the door to the motel and walked in to find the three men playing cards. 

"You seem to be making the most of things. I'm glad of that," Simms said as he sat down on a chair. 

"Well, we got the cards from one of the guys outside and it at least gives us something to do," Harper said defensively. 

"Hey Simms, how did you finally decide on Sandburg and Harper as a team?" Meyer wondered aloud. 

"That was easy. Sandburg is nice on the eyes and Harper's big enough to fight off quite a few men. We couldn't send Ellison because everyone knows him. So that's how we came up with it. And Meyers, your name was given to us by the Vice Captain at your precinct. He said you were easy to work with." Simms smiled as he said all of this. 

"So that's why I was chosen? Because I'm easy on the damn eyes?" Blair asked, irritation in his voice. 

"At least you weren't chosen because you're really tall and big and could fight off a number of men at a time," Harper said sarcastically. 

"All right, back to business," Simms said. 

"Let’s get some of these questions out of the way," Willis sat down and got his tape recorder out. Turning it on he said, "So, Meyers, when did you first notice there was something going on with the two guards in question and Warden Christopher?" 

"I noticed it the first week. They spent a lot of time in Warden Christopher's office but then I noticed they went in without anything and left with packages that they took back to the floors. I followed them and found out it was drugs. They were selling them to the prisoners. This was Jackson and Mills, in case you're wondering which guards I'm talking about. Then I got word to Sandburg and Harper to buy some and let me know what it was. They did as I suggested and it was heroin. This continued on for the following month until you pulled us out. Any questions?" Meyers rattled this all off quickly hoping they could get it over with. 

"Good job, Meyers. This is almost over with," Willis said, smiling for a change. 

"Now, on to Sandburg," Simms started. "We've had a report that you were attacked while in there. Do you need to file a report?" 

"No, sir. I'm fine." Sandburg kept his head down and just waited for the ugly questions. 

"Okay, if you're fine, we're fine. I just don't want anything coming back on us and biting us in the ass," Simms said. 

"What if something did happen because he was going to get gang banged? What if I hadn't stepped in and took the place of the fucking pricks that wanted to hurt him? Would that come back to haunt us in court?" Harper wasn't the only one worried about this right now. 

"No, that won't come back. Everything is looking good, guys. I'll take you home in a few hours. No contact until then. Thank you all for the hard work." Willis walked out the door, followed by Simms. Both men looked very happy about the bust. 

@@@@@

"Jim, once we get back to town, let's go to dinner and go dancing," Connor suggested. "It'll be a nice way to kill some time before Sandy comes home, right?" 

"Okay, you're on. We have reason to celebrate." Jim smiled. 

So they went dancing and called Henry, Rafe and Joel to meet them. Connor called Simon and told him to come but knew he wouldn't. They all sat around the table talking about the undercover assignment. 

"Jim, didn't I tell you from the start that I'd never have believed it?" Joel asked beaming. 

"Yup. You sure did and you were right on the money, Joel." Jim pounded him on the back, happily. 

Jim held his beer up and said, "I want to make a toast." Everyone picked their drinks up to meet Jim's as he made the toast, "this is for Connor. If it wasn't for her being with me this whole time, I'd be dead. I would have been dead the first day. Thank you, Connor." Jim leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. 

"Hear, hear!" everyone said as they clinked their glasses together. 

"Wow! I was expecting something sweet about Sandy. What a surprise, so now let me make a toast. To everyone in the bullpen that made my life bearable when I was so depressed about Sandy. That includes you, too, Jim." 

"Hear, hear!" They all touched their glasses again. 

"I'd like to make a toast to Jim Ellison for not punching my lights out when he found out about all of this," Simon said as he sat down at the table. 

"Hear, hear!" Again, everyone's glasses met. 

"Simon, I wanted too really bad but Connor talked me out of it." Jim wasn't teasing and they all knew it. 

"Actually, sir, it was he that tried to talk me out of punching your lights out. Although, there was just cause and I'm glad I did it now." Connor glared at her boss and Simon knew it was going to be a long time before she forgave him. 

"Well, maybe it would help if I told you I brought gifts. Can I buy your affection, Connor and Ellison?" Simon smiled. 

"What did you bring?" Connor asked hopefully. 

"They were all too big to wrap, so they just had to come in clothes." Simon pointed to the doorway and the first one through the door was Meyers. Everyone got up and gave him hugs and told him how glad they were to see him. 

Next, Harper came through the door and he was also hugged and told how much he was missed. Well, except by Jim. Jim glared at him. Harper leaned into Jim and said, "We'll talk later, all right?" 

"You know we will," Jim said only loud enough for Harper to hear. Except that Connor heard and kicked Jim to get him back on track. 

"This is about Sandy, Jim. Straighten up," Connor whispered. 

Finally, Sandburg came walking through the door looking for only one person. He ran and jumped, putting his legs around Jim's waist. As they hugged and kissed, everyone else hugged them at the same time. 

A song was being played and it was perfect for Jim and Blair both, so Jim took Blair's hand and pulled him onto the dance floor. As they danced Jim sang the song to him. Because, after all, _You Belong To Me_ , screamed theme song for Jim. 

Everyone watched them dancing and they looked over and saw Connor crying. Joel pulled her into his arms and said, "This is a good thing, Connor." 

"I know, they're just so beautiful together, it makes me cry." Connor looked over at Harper and said, "You could ask your man to dance you know." 

"I don't feel like dancing," Harper whined. 

"It's all right, Harp. I understand," Meyers added quietly. 

"Oh, fuck it! Would you like to dance, Mey?" 

"Hell, yes!" Meyers took Harper's hand and joined him on the dance floor. Harper was thankful that the next five songs were slow dances. It's hard to be graceful while dancing fast when you're 6' 8" tall. 

At the end of the evening, Simon had to finally go and tell Jim and Blair to go home. He realized that Connor was right. They were just so romantic you forgot where you were. 

@@@@@

The drive home was quiet and Blair knew why. "Jim, want to ask me questions?" 

"No, not now." Jim pulled into the parking spot and they walked up the stairs to their home. 

Once they were in the loft, Blair asked, "Jim, did you ever have to do something while undercover that you regretted but knew you had to?" 

"Yeah, I guess. Is that what you're going to tell me about? Your regrets?" 

"No! I just needed to know if you ever regretted anything. I take it someone told you he fucked me. Jim, four men were going to take me if he didn't. He wouldn't let them have me, so he fucked me. He was gentle and kind, not like the others would have been," Blair explained as calmly as he could. 

Jim pulled Blair into his arms. "I'm so pissed off at him for taking what's mine, but at the same time, I'm thrilled that he saved you from those fucking monsters." 

"Jim, you can't blame him. Please? He saved my life." Blair pleaded now. 

"I'll call him later and tell him I'm sorry." Jim took Blair's hand and started up the stairs. 

Once there, Jim started to slowly disrobe the young man. Jim had forgotten how sexy his man could be. Blair's stomach had a little dip in it that made Jim's mouth drool. How could I have forgotten that? He looked up and saw the dimple in his chin and realized he had forgotten how fucking sweet it was. He next noticed the little scar on Blair's neck that always made him want to kiss it and make it better. Jesus, he had forgotten everything. Jim pulled Blair into his arms and just shook. 

"Jim, what's wrong? Are you mad at me?" 

"No, babe, not mad at you. I'm angry at me because I forgot." 

"You forgot what, Jim?" 

"I forgot you. I mean, I remembered what your face was like but I forgot your body. God, I can't believe I did that." Jim continued to shake. 

"Jim, how about we undress and sleep for awhile? I could do with some rest," Blair offered. 

They both finished undressing and slid under the covers. Jim pulled Blair into his arms and they were both asleep in moments. 

@@@@@

"Harp... Please... " Blair moaned in a whisper. 

Jim looked at Blair in shock and disbelief. He got out of bed and got dressed. He walked downstairs and knocked on Harper's loft door. It worked out well, now and then, that they lived in the same building. 

After three loud knocks, Meyers answered the door. Jim pushed his way in and asked, "Where is he?" 

"I'm not going to tell you where he is, Jim. You're not going after my lover. He did what he had to do undercover. Now go home," Meyers said patiently. 

"I need to talk to him. Now either go and get him or I'll go looking for him," Jim growled at Meyers. 

"We all have to get over this shit, Jim. You're not the only one hurting. God, I hate that he slept with another man. I fucking hate it. But he was doing the shitty job and I have to get past it. Promise me you won't hurt Harp?" Meyers looked worriedly at Jim. 

Completely upset about everything, he said, "He's asking for Harp. And it's not in a help me type of tone. It's a needy tone." 

"Jim, sit down and we'll talk," Harper said as he descended the loft stairs. 

"What's there to talk about? Just go upstairs and make him happy," Jim spat out. 

"Get a grip, Jim. Okay, did he say, 'Harp, please'?" 

"That's exactly what he said." Jim looked at Harper taken aback. 

"Okay, this is what we had to do. The first night he woke me up calling your name. That was not good. We practiced after that so he never called out your name again. Now you need to give him time to get the hang of being able to say Jim again." Harper helped Jim to the door but Jim was having none of it. 

"Are we going to be able to work together after all of this?" Jim asked. "I'm having some trouble with it. Sandburg will be fine, but I think I might dislike you." 

"It's going to be fine, Jim. Stop worrying. And by the way while I fucked him he was crying softly for you. Does it help that it made me feel like fucking shit?" Harper looked on the verge of tears himself. 

Jim went into his arms and said, "I'm sorry, Harp. I thank you for taking care of him. I'm a jealous, single minded son-of-a-bitch." Jim held on tight. 

"I'm going upstairs, Kelly. I'll see you up there. Night, Jim," Meyers said as he went up to bed. 

"No, Meyers, stay here. Tell Harper how you feel," Jim said quietly into Harper's chest. 

"What's he talking about, Mey?" 

"I'm angry at you. You already know that. You fucked him like you've never fucked me and I want to yell and scream about it. No, I don't like you right now and I'm not certain I can do this relationship thing, either." Meyers then walked up the stairs, head hanging down. 

"Go home, Jim, and hold him and remind him of whom he's with. Promise me? You and I can talk over these problems in the next day or two but let's not lose our friendship over this. Promise me we'll stay friends?" 

"I think the one you better worry about is Meyers. Go and take care of him, Harp." Jim walked to the door and allowed Harper to push him out. 

Jim waited outside their door to listen and see how things were going. He had to know that they'd be all right, even if he wasn't sure about he and Sandburg. 

Harper walked up the stairs hoping he wouldn't see his lover packing, but he was. He was packing his fucking bags. "You're going to leave me over this, Mey?" 

"Harp, I can't do it any more. You don't love me like other people love their wives or husbands. I long for those things. I'm sorry but I have to look for someone that can really love me." Meyers continued to pack as he looked over at Harper's sad face. 

"What would it take for me to prove to you that I love you?" Harp was desperate now. 

"See? Harp, this is what I'm talking about. If you loved me and wanted to prove it, you wouldn't be asking me how, you'd do it." Mey still had hope for him to come through. 

"I tell you that I love you all the time. I do love you, babe. You're my life and when we're dancing I feel like we were born to dance together. Have I mentioned how much I love to dance with you? I hate to do it in public because people stare at us like we shouldn't be doing this and enjoying it." Harper was talking as he got closer to Meyer and he was shaking now. He wasn't just trembling, he was shaking like crazy. "Please don't leave me. God, I love you so much. Please? I need you so much, I don't know if I can make it without you." 

Meyers went into his arms and said, "All right, that's more like it. How about you showing me how much you love me by making love to me. It's only us, Harp. You and me from now on." Meyers moved towards to bed to begin getting undressed. 

@@@@@

Outside Harper's apartment, Jim knew that it was time to move upstairs. With a smile on his face, he climbed the stairs and hoped that he and Blair could work things out. 

When he walked into the loft, he saw Blair sitting on the stairs. 

Jim knelt down in front of him and said, "Hey, babe. I couldn't sleep but I'm getting tired now. Wanna try again?" 

"Jim, I'm not stupid. I know you went downstairs and had words with Harper. Are you happy now? Did you hit him and did it make you feel better?" 

"Nah, I never hit him, Blair. We had a good talk and I cried on his shoulder. You called out for him and I freaked out. He told me how you both had to practice saying the other's name at night so it wouldn't happen again. God, I'm sorry." Jim pulled him into his arms and they sat there together. 

"Why didn't you wake me up and tell me who I was with?" 

"Because I'm an idiot. Now let's go upstairs and get some rest." Jim picked Blair up and put him over his shoulder and walked up the stairs. 

"Jim, what are you doing?" 

"I'm reminding you who you are with." He threw Blair down on the bed and he stripped out of his own clothes as quickly as he could. Blair watched with big eyes as he had forgotten what Jim looked like, too. It wasn't just Jim forgetting. Jim stood naked in front of the bed and Blair slid his boxers off and Jim saw that Blair was already excited about being together. 

"I want you to fuck me," Jim whispered. 

Blair flipped Jim onto his belly and kissed his way down Jim's back until he came to his waist. "Jim, you even have a sexy waist." Blair heard Jim laugh and this made things even more fun. Blair said, "Hey, man, do you have any flavored lube?" 

"Yeah. It's in the same place it's always been, Chief," Jim answered with a knowing smile. 

Blair leaned over and got the drawer open and took out all of the different flavors of lube and decided on his favorite one. 

In that same drawer, he saw numerous things that belonged to Connor. _'Why were they in the drawer in their room?'_ Blair was going to have to talk to Jim about this when the time came. Now wasn't that time. 

Jim looked over his shoulder at what Blair had and moaned. This was going to be a long night, thank god. 

It had been so long since anyone had touched him that Jim was shaking. "Calm down, Jim. We have all night long. I know you want it bad but we're taking our time," Blair whispered into Jim's sensitive back causing goose bumps to appear. Blair smiled and sighed. I still got it. 

Blair wanted to make this like their first time. Getting between Jim's legs, he began his work and he was a damn good worker. By the time he got to Jim's ass, the larger man was putty in his hands. Smiling again, he pulled Jim's cheeks apart and dove in for the first taste in a long, long time. Jim came off the bed and almost knocked Blair right off of him. Blair pulled away from him and said, "Calm down, Jim. Do you want this?" 

"Yeah, I want it bad," Jim panted. 

"Then don't knock me off the bed," Blair said, laughing, as he went back to eating Jim's ass and having a damn fine time doing it. There was no talking, just Jim moaning and every now and then, begging for Blair to fuck him. Blair pulled Jim up so that his cock was hanging down where he could get it while he sucked and licked his ass. Jim put his head on his arms and groaned knowing that Blair was going to make him suffer. 

Jim could hardly stand it when Blair reached under him, took his cock in hand and started stroking it softly. The entire time he kept tongue fucking him and Jim couldn't hold on anymore. "Sandburg..." The large man was coming all over the bed and Blair's hands. 

Blair loved when Jim's ass gripped his tongue. That was a very big turn on. Now he was ready to fuck Jim. He was nervous at first, but he was over that now. God, he loved this man. He took the lube and started to loosen him up for the fucking of his life. Once he had three fingers in there and Jim was begging; he figured it was time to move on. 

He flipped Jim over and Jim said, "Sandburg, I'm lying in the wet spot." 

"Do you want this or not?" 

"What wet spot?" Jim helped Blair get the angle right and Blair slid in. "Oh god, this is beautiful. I missed you so much. Baby, I missed you fucking me. I missed you loving me." 

"I missed it, too, Jim. I love you so much and your ass is all I thought about. Okay, well not all I thought about. Now I know why. You feel so fucking good. I promise to never leave you again." Blair kept the chant up while he pounded into Jim. 

Jim was hard once again and fisting his own cock so he could come with Blair. "Come on, Sandburg, give it to me!" Jim came shouting this and Blair followed him soon after. 

Blair lay on top of Jim and just looked at him. "I had forgotten how beautiful you were." Blair smiled as he said it making Jim blush. 

"Beautiful? I don't think anyone has ever said that to me, babe." Jim smiled and kissed him softly. 

"Well, I'm saying it now. You're beautiful. You have wonderful skin and you have crinkles around your eyes when you smile that make me smile. You have a perfect nose and your eyes are to die for. So basically, you're gorgeous." Blair's cock had slipped out of Jim and he pulled himself up closer to Jim. 

"I didn't want it to end." Jim stated quietly. 

"We have our whole lives, Jim. I love you." Blair kissed him and got up to get some wet cloths to clean them off. 

@@@@@

 **Day45**

"Mey? You awake?" 

"I am now," Meyers answered. 

"I need to talk to you about something important." Harper pulled Meyers close to him and waited for his answer. 

"So talk." 

"Remember how you said it'll never be the same because you would always be second with my gentle love making?" 

"How could I forget?" Meyers was trying to move away but Harper wasn't letting him. 

"Okay, let's see if your memory goes back this far. Remember when I stayed with Jim and Blair?" 

"Of course I do. Why?" 

"Mey, do you remember the night that Jim and I were on an undercover assignment?" 

"Harp, why are you asking me this shit? Yeah, I remember, so what?" 

"Well, that night I made love to you like I'd never done before. I was gentle and passionate. I had forgotten about it. It was the first time I told you I loved you." 

"Harp, I forgot, too. God, I'm so glad you remembered. It was beautiful that night. I won't be second. I was your first." 

"That's right, Mey. You'll always be my first." Harper pulled him in close and they started kissing. Harper was going to show him gentle again. Meyers would never forget this night. 

@@@@@

The phone rang in the morning and Jim answered, beings he was already up, "Ellison." 

"Ellison, I have a wonderful idea." an excited Connor said. 

"And what is it?" 

"We're going to have a party at the loft for Blair's birthday. He'll be so happy about it." She waited excitedly for Jim's answer. 

"I guess that would be all right," Jim finally said. 

"So tell me, Ellison, did you fuck his brains out last night?" Connor giggled as soon as she said it. 

"Fuck you, Connor. It's no one's business." 

"Jim, you didn't? What's going on, I know you have to want him?" 

"Connor, first of all it's none of your business. Next, maybe I was the one fucked," Jim said quietly. 

"Oh okay, well that's good, too. You can do him next." Connor was still giggling. 

"Whatever." Jim tried to change the subject, "So when should we make plans for this party?" 

Connor didn't like the sound of that response. "Tell Blair you have to do something at work and come by to make the plans." 

"Okay. I'll be over in a few minutes." Jim hung the phone up without even saying goodbye. 

"Sandburg? Wake up. I'm leaving and I didn't want you to worry." Jim started to get dressed. 

"Well, give me a minute and I'll go with ya." Blair started to get up and Jim stopped him. "I'm going to talk to Connor. She said it was private." 

"Oh sure. Okay. Well, I'll be here when you get back." Blair got back under the covers and as soon as he heard the door slam, he started shaking. He didn't know what was going on with Jim, but he could see the changes in both of them. It was scaring the shit out of him. "Oh shit! He's going to fucking leave me. He doesn't love me any more." Blair was up and running for the shower. 

"And what's going on with Jim and Connor?" Blair said aloud in the shower. "I can't believe she would fuck my man." 

He had to do something and that wasn't lying in bed feeling sorry for himself. He got his running shorts on and tied his hair back and took off out the door. 

As he came down the stairs he ran into Meyers. "Want to run together?" 

"Sure." Blair answered with a smile. No sense in taking my fucking bad day out on Meyers. 

"Where's Jim? Doesn't he usually run with you?" 

"Yeah, but he had to go over to Connor's. Something needed to be discussed she said." Blair said it so casually that Meyers almost bought it. 

"He doesn't have a thing for her, Blair. Don't worry, okay?" 

"Okay. I'll take your word for it since I really need that right now." Even if I think you're wrong. 

They began their run and there was no more talking. They ran for about four miles and then had a cool down period. They both ended up on a bench in the park and Meyers said, "Can I tell you something?" 

"Sure. We're friends, that's what friends are for." 

"Remember how mad I was at you and Harp because he was so gentle with you? And I told him that I would never be first, I'd always be second?" 

"Yeah, I remember." Blair wouldn't look at Meyers. 

"Well, Harp remembered the night that he and Jim were undercover at the gay bar. He didn't fuck me that night. He made love to me. It was the first time he told me he loved me and he was so fucking gentle it wasn't even funny. So I had it all along and was too busy putting the blame on you. I'm sorry. But I have to tell you; he made love to me like that again last night and it was wonderful." 

"I'm so glad that things are working out for the two of you. Jim and I are having a few setbacks but I have hope that we'll work them out and get back to normal." Blair stood up ready to head back. 

"Blair? Please feel free to call on us anytime you need someone to talk to." Meyers threw his arm across Blair's shoulders. 

"Thanks, Meyers. You have no idea how much this means to me." Blair walked slowly back to the loft. He wasn't in any hurry to get there. Jim wasn't there. He wasn't due in to work for two days, so what in the hell would he do? 

"Hey, we're going to a museum today, wanna go with us," Meyers called up the stairs, as Blair was heading up to the loft. 

"Nah, I better not. I don't want to upset Jim." 

He had no sooner sat down to take his running shoes off when the door opened up. He jumped up and saw Harper and Meyers standing there. 

"What the fuck did that mean? You don't want to upset Jim?" Harper was pissed. 

"He's not over all of this, Harper. He's having a hard time. I have to give him some space and we'll work it out," Blair tried to explain, but knew they wouldn't understand. 

"Blair, come with us. It'll be fun and tough shit if he doesn't like it," Meyers smiled as he pushed Blair towards the shower, "you know you want to." 

"Okay, you talked me into it. I'll be down in a few." He pushed them out the door and smiled the entire time he was in the shower. 

When he walked out of the bathroom, Jim was standing there. "Oh hey, man. You scared me. When did you get back?" 

"I just walked in the door. I heard you singing. You're happy about something?" Jim narrowed his eyes. 

"Hell! Jim, I'm happy about a lot of things." Blair walked up the stairs and tried to get dressed. 

Jim followed him up and took the naked man into his arms and began to kiss him. 

"Hey, hot shot, what brought this on?" Blair smiled at the thought of Jim fucking him. 

"Just saw you naked and wanted to kiss you. Got a problem with that?" 

Blair looked at Jim and realized he was serious. "No, no problem at all." Blair pulled the covers back and slid into bed. 

Jim got undressed and joined him. He pulled Blair over on top of him and they were getting busy thrusting their cocks together when Blair asked, "Will you fuck me, Jim?" 

"Why do you do that?" Jim snapped. 

"Do what?" 

"You always have to be in control of what we're doing. I was having one hellava good time before you said that. You have problems with my technique?" Jim's cock was completely deflated now. Blair was honestly almost scared of him. 

"No, man. You know that's not it. I just wanted to feel you inside of me." Blair moved over to him and held on tight. "I'm sorry." 

"Fine, but from now on, let me do things my way. Understood?" Jim moved back to see if Blair did. 

"Jim, don't tell me what to do. You're being an asshole. I said I was sorry but you can't tell me what I can say and do in our bedroom." Blair was up and started to get dressed now. 

"Then I think you should move back downstairs until we come to terms with this. When you think you can accept me on my terms you can move back up here." Jim slid out of bed and Blair watched his lover get dressed. 

Blair went to the closet and pulled a duffle bag out. He drug it over to the dresser and began to pack it with his things. Jim watched him and realized he was taking everything. 

"Sandburg, you can leave your clothes up here. You can come and get them as you need them." 

"No, thanks. I'm moving out. I can't stay here anymore. Jim, I was hoping it would work but it can't." Blair was very upset as he talked. 

"Sandburg, you're making a big deal out of this. Just put your things back in the dresser." 

"You don't love me anymore, do you?" Blair asked, still upset. 

"Stop looking like I ran over your puppy. I hate when you do that. Didn't anyone ever tell you that it doesn't help pouting and it makes you look unmanly?" 

"Well, tough shit. I'm not much of a man anyhow." Blair picked the duffle up and started down the stairs. He was still trying to keep from crying. 

"Sandburg, wait...." Jim came down the stairs and stood in front of Blair. 

"What?" 

"Call me and let me know where you are." Jim stared at the floor and never lifted his eyes. 

"Fuck you, Ellison. Along with not loving me, you stopped calling me Chief or Blair in the last few days. I didn't do anything wrong but here I am paying for it anyhow. You're the only person I've ever loved. I'm real sorry that I let you down." Blair took off out the front door and Jim could still hear his labored breathing. 

Jim slammed the door and threw himself on the sofa. _Well, Ellison, you got just what you wanted._

@@@@@

Meanwhile, across town, Connor called Simon. "Banks." 

"Sir, it's me. I wanted to tell you about a little party we have planned tomorrow for Sandy." Connor was humming with happiness. 

"You and who?" Simon asked. 

"Me and Ellison. Who did you think?" 

"Well, hold off on that, all right? What was the party for anyhow?" 

"We all missed his birthday while he was undercover. Simon, let's do it tomorrow. I think it would make him so happy." Connor was almost begging. 

"Connor, that would be great but he doesn't live at the loft any more." Simon knew she was going to explode. 

"What are you talking about, Simon? I just talked to Jim about four hours ago. Things were fine." 

"Well, they aren't. Jim told him to move to the small bedroom and Sandburg moved out. He just called to let me know where he was for work." 

"Where is he? God, I can't believe this. After all he's been through, Jim lets him go." Connor started to cry and Simon cut her off at the pass. 

"Connor, crying doesn't help a damn thing. So stop doing it." Simon commanded. "He's staying at his friend, Keith's, house." 

"Well, I'm having a birthday party for him tomorrow. I'll have it here. Are you going to come?" 

"Yes, Connor, I'll be there," Simon said sadly. He knew this was his fault. 

"Will you call Rafe, Brown and Joel and tell them to be here tomorrow at 3:00?" Connor asked nicely. 

"Yeah. You going to invite Jim?" 

"I don't know yet. I might," Connor was ready to plan this thing now. "Talk to you later, Simon." 

She called Harper and Meyers and told them what was going on and invited them to the party. 

"We'll be there, Connor," Harper said quickly. 

"I'll see you both then?" 

"Yes, Connor. We're fine," Harper said with a smile in his voice. 

"Well, I guess I better call the birthday boy," Connor laughed as she dialed Keith's number. 

"Sandburg." 

"Hey Sandy, what are you doing tomorrow at 3:00?" 

"Nothing, why? What's happening?" 

"I'm having a get together for Meyers birthday. So you'll come?" Connor asked. 

"Sure. Ah... Is Jim going to be there?" Blair was suddenly very uncertain about what he should do or say. 

"Yeah, I'm going to invite him, Sandy, but if he's smart he'll stay clear of all of us." 

"Connor, this is what I 'so' didn't want to happen." 

"Well, tough. It's too late now. So we'll see you tomorrow, right?" 

"Yeah, Connor. I'll see you tomorrow. Thanks for the invite." 

"Bye, Sandy." Connor got off the phone and called Jim straight away. 

"Ellison." 

"Connor." 

"Very funny, Connor. What do you want?" 

"I'm having the party for Sandy tomorrow at 3:00. I know you won't come but I wanted to invite you anyway." Connor couldn't believe how she talked to him sometimes. 

"Yeah, I'll be there." 

"You'll be there?" 

"Are you having trouble understanding me today, Connor?" 

"Jim, you just broke up with Sandy. I was just being nice. I didn't expect you to actually come." 

"Well, I want to come. We all missed his birthday while he was in there. So I'll be there." 

"Jim?" 

"What? You going to give me a lecture?" 

"Nope... You better buy him something really nice. Wanna go shopping, with me now?" 

"That would be nice." Jim was really glad she was going to come with him. 

"Give me a few minutes and we'll have dinner and shop." 

"Okay. Thanks, Connor." Jim hung up the phone and waited patiently for her to get there. 

*** 

At Keith's house, Blair lay in bed sad, depressed and still wondering when things would stop going crazy. "Jim's right, it is fucking unmanly to whine and pout. I'm going to stop doing this shit." Blair got up and got dressed to go out for dinner. 

*** 

Connor picked Jim up and they went to the nice sandwich shop near the jewelry store that she was going to force Jim into afterwards. They sat and talked about a little bit of everything, except for Sandburg. His name wasn't mentioned and this made Jim feel like he died or something. While they were sitting there she told Jim a joke and he started laughing really hard and then put his head on the table. Connor figured out he was crying. She pulled Jim's face up and held it in her hands and was talking to him when Blair walked into the restaurant. He saw how cozy the two of them were and realized now why things weren't the same with him and Jim. He walked out before either of them noticed. 

"You wanna tell me what that was all about, Jim?" 

"God, I fuck everything up in my life. He's the best thing that ever happened to me and I made him feel like crap." 

"It's not too late. You can fix it, Jim. You're going to give him a ring and it's going to be inscribed and you're going to beg, even if it's in front of all of us. Do you understand?" Connor asked, not really expecting no for an answer. 

"Yes, I understand." 

"Okay, first of all, what is the problem? Why did you break up?" 

"Connor, I'm not telling you. God, some things are personal." 

"Fine, I'll just go home." Connor stood up and Jim pulled her back down into the chair. 

"I can't fuck him," Jim whispered to her. 

"You mean you can't get hard?" she whispered back. 

"No... I just can't fuck him. I let him fuck me but all I can think about is Harper when I look at his ass now." Jim looked at her waiting for the yelling. 

"Do you think you should start seeing a therapist for that? He's got a beautiful ass, Jim, and someone else will start to use it if you don't." Connor figured that might scare him. 

"What do you mean?" 

"Like the guy he's staying with, Keith. Have you ever seen him?" Connor asked evilly. 

"No, why?" 

"He's gorgeous and he wants Sandy big time and Sandy will probably give in one of these days." She sat back and smiled at her evil work. 

"Fuck... I'm fucked no matter what," Jim whispered. 

"Actually, I think that you need to make some decisions. You need to decide if he appeals to you anymore or not. If not, let him go. He deserves to be happy, Jim. Okay?" 

"Okay. I'll think on it tonight and make my decision. Do you want to go shopping now?" 

"Sure." Connor led the way out of the shop and couldn't wait to see how much she could make him spend. 

Neither of them noticed the sad young man sitting on the bench across the street. He saw them go into the jewelry shop and watched them laugh, talk, joke and spend money together. He noticed that Connor seemed to have her hands on Jim a lot. He had never noticed that. _Must have happened while I was away._

Blair walked to his car, got in and drove over to Harper's place. He knocked on the door and Harper pulled him inside and he and Meyers held him and let him cry. They didn't tell him he was unmanly. 

Jim and Connor decided on a gorgeous necklace and bracelet. One had a panther on it and the other had a wolf. Jim inscribed both with Jim and Blair forever. Connor cracked up when she read it. 

"Jim, that's so you. Only you would put something from high school." 

"You think he'll laugh?" 

"No, he'll probably cry 'cuz it'll make him happy" 

"I better get home. I have to wrap these and get some food made for tomorrow." 

"So does that mean that you're going to try to work things out?" Connor asked hopefully. 

"Hell! I have no idea but I do know that I want him to have a nice birthday," Jim said as he rode with Connor to go home. 

"Oh god, he's going to fuck this up, I can see it now," Connor said to herself as she drove home after dropping Jim off. 

@@@@@

 **Day 46**

Jim got the food ready to go and the gifts and made his way downstairs to head over to Connor's place. 

Once there he helped her decorate and get all food set out for everyone. 

"Thanks for coming early, Jim. Any decisions yet?" 

"No, I figured I'd play it by ear." Jim went back to blowing up the balloons. 

"But Jim, you don't want to fuck him. You can't play something like that by ear. You can't hurt him like that." 

"I said I'm thinking about it," Jim growled. 

"Fine," Connor growled back. 

At 3:00, everyone showed up but the birthday boy. They all sat around acting like it was no big thing but Jim knew it was because he was there. He had ruined Blair's birthday surprise. 

Harper walked up to him and said, "Prick." 

Jim shoved him and said, "Fucker." 

"Fucking prick." Harper shoved Jim so hard that Jim landed on the floor that time. 

"Cocksucker." Jim yelled at him as he went to shove him back. 

"Hey, is this foreplay? I've always wondered what gay men do differently. So is this foreplay? Way cool. Reminds me a little of wrestling." Connor stood between the two men. 

"It's none of your business, Connor." Jim shouted. 

"Well, it is mine. Now knock it off." Simon shouted louder than anyone did. 

He left before anyone else and didn't talk much to anyone after the display he put on. You don't deserve friends, you bastard. 

@@@@@

 **Day 47**

Jim wasn't looking forward to working with Sandburg. He knew it was going to be uncomfortable. Why not put in for a transfer and make him feel even worse about things? 

Blair walked in and sat at his desk, next to Jim's. "Jim, are we going to be okay to work together?" 

"Yeah. We'll be fine, Sandburg," 

"Good." Blair started catching up on all of his paperwork. 

"So how come you didn't come for the party yesterday?" Jim couldn't let it go. 

"Because I had already spent the evening with him, so I figured that was more than enough and didn't want to force him to put up with me during the party," Blair was explaining and saw a very hurt look on Jim's face. 

"So I take it you like him." 

Blair stopped what he was doing when he realized they must be in the Ellison zone. "Jim, what in the hell are you talking about?" 

"You said you spent the evening with him and I just asked if you liked him?" 

"Of course I like him, you moron." Blair got up and went for coffee. He needed something to wake himself up. 

Blair was right in the middle of taking a drink of coffee when Jim whispered, "I miss you." 

Blair spit coffee all over himself and Rafe's new suit. "Sorry, man. Sorry." 

"Oh like he cares." Jim pulled Blair away from trying to clean off his shirt and said, "Did you hear me?" 

"Well hell yeah, I heard you but it makes no sense. What is Connor busy tonight?" 

"What does Connor have to do with this, Sandburg?" 

"I saw how cozy the two of you were on Saturday. Don't you even try and deny it. And you know what? I don't want to do this Jim. I'd rather be single for a while," and having said that, he walked back into the bullpen and did more paperwork. 

Jim went and sat at his desk and tried to figure out where his plan had gone wrong. 

Harper walked over to the desk and said, "Hey Sandburg, want to go for dinner tonight?" 

Jim stared at the two of them and wanted to throw up. Instead, he stood up and threw Harper to the floor and the fight was on. They just kept wrestling and smacking each other, not really hurting each other, but it didn't matter to Blair. "Knock it off you two. I mean it. Right now." 

They both totally ignored Sandburg and kept wrestling. Connor walked in and said, "Oh cool. Fight. Fight. Fight. Fight." 

"Don't encourage them, Connor. They're both acting like idiots." Sandburg went to get Simon. 

"All right you two, knock it off," Simon shouted and both men stopped as they got up from the floor. 

"How do you do that, sir?" 

"It's all in my vocal chords, Sandburg. Everyone else back to work. Ellison and Harper, get your asses into my office." Simon looked around to see if anyone was actually listening and was happy to see that everyone was back to work. 

Connor walked back over to her desk and finished her paperwork. She missed the evil looks that Blair had been giving her. 

"What is wrong with the two of you? You're fucking detectives. You don't wrestle on the floor of the bullpen. Keep this shit out of here. Is that understood?" 

"Yes, sir," Harper said as he left. 

"Yes, sir. I'm sorry," Jim said as he left. 

"Ellison, stay a minute," 

"What?" an apprehensive Jim Ellison asked. 

"Are you even trying to work things out with Sandburg? You're both miserable without the other. Fix it." Simon shoved Jim out the door as he concluded his little speech. 

@@@@@

At the end of the day, Rafe said, "Hey we're all going down to the Pub. You two want to come?" 

"Sure, that might be fun," Blair said as he stood up taking his leave. 

"Sandburg, I thought we might talk." Jim really hated whining, but he couldn't see any other way out. 

"I told you I don't want to get back together. Deal with it." Blair walked to the elevator without even saying a goodbye. 

Jim went home, but Blair went to the Pub and threw darts until his arm ached. 

"Sandburg, you might want to give him a break," Simon was well on his way to being toasted. 

"Why, sir?" 

"You should have seen the presents he got for you. We're talking nice things. Connor said she took Jim to a fancy jewelry shop for them. It's not his fault that you didn't show up for your own party." Simon was starting to slouch more each minute. 

"Sir, it wasn't my birthday." 

"We know. Jim was all upset while you were inside and we all missed it. So he and Connor planned it. Then you didn't show up. He thinks you have a boyfriend." 

"I swear we could give Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman a run for her money. We're past dysfunctional." Blair was up and heading towards the door. "Bye, everyone. See you tomorrow." 

@@@@@

Jim was sleeping already when he heard someone at the door. Then he heard the door open and he grabbed his gun. 

"It's me, Jim. Don't shoot." 

"What are you doing here? And if you moved out, how come you still have a key?" 

"Because I never intended on staying away for too long. I don't like being away from you." 

"Could have fooled me," Jim spat out. 

"Excuse me, who's the one that won't fuck me?" 

"Low blow, Chief. Low blow." 

"I want you to fuck me. Right here and right now." Blair looked to see if Jim was going to freak out. 

He pulled Blair into his arms and said, "I'm scared, Chief. God, I love you so much." 

"There is no reason to be scared, Jim. It's just me. Now tell me why you're afraid." 

"I'm afraid that I won't measure up after Harper made love to you." 

"He didn't make love to me, Jim. He fucked me so the monsters would know I belonged to him." 

Blair started to cry as Jim moved in closer. "I don't want to be reminded of him. That's a terrible time for me. Anything from that prison is a nightmare for me. I want you to make love to me like you used to. I want you to love me like you used to." 

"Blair, I do love you. I've always loved you. I'm just an idiot. Come on. Follow me." Jim led him upstairs where he made sweet love to him, twice. 

Jim didn't care how unmanly it was, he cried when he made love to Blair. Blair cried too, because he knew that things were going to be all right. 

@@@@@

In the morning Jim gave Blair his presents and told him Happy Birthday, late. Blair opened up the package and went into Jim's arms again. "Make love to me again?" 

"No, you'll be sore. You make love to me this time," and Blair did just that. There was one thing that Jim was always certain of. How much he needed Sandburg. 

@@@@@

The day at work was uneventful and quiet. Jim was grateful for that. While he sat at his desk, he made reservations at a really nice restaurant for that night. He was going to woo his man. 

When they went out to dinner, they danced until they were exhausted. Jim wanted to show Blair how much he really did mean to him. Everyone on the dance floor stopped and watched Jim and Blair, as they seemed to move as one. Blair always told Jim they were like poetry in motion. 

"You do know what you have to do, right?" Blair asked as they were driving home. 

"No, what?" 

"You have to apologize to Harper. He didn't do anything except his job." 

"I'll do it tomorrow at work. Is that good enough?" Jim asked hoping that would be. 

"Nope, we're going to stop by tonight." 

"Chief, do you enjoy bossing me around?" 

"Damned straight." Blair giggled at the pun. 

"I was hoping that we could go home and make love," Jim whispered. 

"Nope, we're going to their place and you're going to make nice." Blair pulled Jim into his arms to let him know things would be all right. 

When they stood outside their friend's apartment, Blair knocked loudly. After a few moments, there was no answer and Jim said, "Okay, they're not here. Let's go upstairs." 

"No such luck, Ellison," Meyers said as he opened the door. 

"Hey, Mey, how goes it?" Blair asked as he did one of those hand shake things with him. 

"Pretty good, Sandburg. Are we going to see some sucking up tonight?" 

"Oh, yeah. He's primed and ready." Blair laughed at the look on Jim's face. 

"Why are you two speaking about me as if I'm not in the room?" 

Harper came down the stairs and said, "Because you're just that easy, hot shot." 

"You told them you call me hot shot?" Jim looked horrified. 

"I don't know how to tell you this, Ellison, but I call Mey hot shot and he calls me hot shot. You don't own the market on those words." Harper was trying not to laugh. 

"Jim, give him and hug and tell him how sorry you are." Blair was pushing him towards Harper. 

"I'd rather be abducted by aliens," Jim said crossing his arms over his chest. "Not just abducted, but I'd rather have the probe done and everything." 

"Fine, just apologize, smart ass," Blair said tersely. 

"Harper, I'm really sorry for being an asshole," Jim said and then moved towards the door. Looking back he saw he was alone and asked, "Chief, what's wrong? I did it. If we hurry we might be able to catch CSI." 

"Jim, that was a terrible apology." Blair glared at him until he came back. 

"Ellison, do you even know what you're apologizing for?" Harper asked. 

"Sort of. He didn't tell me everything, but I know that I was mean to you and I shouldn't have embarrassed you at work with the wrestling match." 

Harper went and sat on the couch and patted it and said, "Sit down and tell me why you're sorry." 

"Blair, you never said I would have to do this. I want to go home now." Jim was freaking out, and everyone could tell. 

"Jim, sit..." Harper said loudly. 

And a weird thing happened; Ellison sat down. 

"I was watching a rerun of Soap last night and it reminded me of the two of us," Harper said this so casually that Jim didn't know what to make of it. 

"What in the hell are you talking about?" Jim really did want to hear this answer. 

"Have you seen it?" Harper asked him. 

"Well, of course, I've seen it. I think everyone's seen it." 

"Well, you remind me of Burt Campbell and I remind me of his step-son, Danny Dallas, that's a deputy to Burt's Sheriff. They're at each other's throats all the time. They love each other, but they just can't seem to get along. No matter how hard Danny tries, he just can't seem to make Burt happy. So I think maybe we weren't meant to be friends. It's all right. We can still work together, but you won't have to hang with me. I'm tired. Goodnight, everyone," Harper got up with such a sad look on his face that everyone's heart was broken. 

"Did you ever think that maybe I might need someone to help me when I'm trying to become invisible?" Jim said quickly, getting Harper's attention. 

"What are you talking about, Jim?" Blair asked. 

"They're so young, aren't they?" Harper asked Jim. 

"We can't hold it against them because they make us older guys feel really good," Jim said laughing. 

"I guess I could stick around and help you when you feel the need to become invisible." Harper just stood there not knowing what he should do. 

"Hell! Lately I want to be invisible all the time." Jim looked up at Harper, not sure of what to do, either. 

Blair and Meyers stared at them still lost. 

"I didn't mean it when I said I'd rather be abducted by aliens than hug you. I'm sorry, Harp," Jim went into his arms and they hugged for a long time. 

"Well, I hope there's no crying because that's not allowed tonight," Meyers said jokingly. "Does someone want to tell me and Sandburg about this Soap thing?" 

Jim and Harper laughed as they sat down and started to tell the youngsters about one of the most fun shows on television. 

@@@@@

 **Day 60**

That night began the first of many nightmares for one Blair Sandburg. Jim woke to his mumbling and then he really listened to what he was saying. 

"No. No. Please, no. Jim, help me. NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jim was finally able to wake him from his screaming nightmare. "What's going on, man?" 

"You were having a terrible nightmare," Jim held on tight. 

"Did I say something to upset you?" Blair was concerned at how tight Jim was holding him. 

"No, I just don't like you to have nightmares." Jim loosened his grip on him and started rubbing his back. He had hopes that he could fall asleep and they wouldn't have to deal with that again. 

For the next ten nights, Blair had the very same nightmare. He was getting harder and harder to wake up and it was breaking Jim's heart. Jim knew he was going to have to talk to someone about this. 

@@@@@

 **Day 70**

"Connor, would you like to go to lunch with me?" Jim asked as he walked by her desk. 

"Where's Sandy?" 

"Well, he's in court, Missy, and I can ask you to lunch if I want to." Jim laughed at the look on her face over being called Missy. 

"Sure, I'll go. Are we going to somewhere bad for us?" 

"Where else?" Jim laughed as they walked to the stairway. 

When they arrived at a nice Chinese restaurant Megan was surprised. "I thought you said bad for us?" 

"Give this place a chance. I love it here. It's nice and quiet and I need to talk to you." Jim had on his serious face. 

"Oh god, please don't tell me you're breaking up. I couldn't stand it, mate." 

"No, I just need to talk to you. Let's let them seat us and we'll order and then we'll talk." The two friends followed the waitress and sat down in the large booth. 

"I know why you're comfortable here. These are huge booths. I love them. I hate being cramped up in a small one," Connor stretched out as she spoke. 

They both placed their order and then Connor stared at Jim, waiting. 

"Come on, what's going on?" Connor watched as Jim tried to keep his composure. He was failing rapidly. "Ellison, you're scaring me." 

"He blames me, Connor." It came out as a whisper and Connor wasn't certain that was even what he said. 

"How do you know this? He told you he blames you?" 

"Ten nights in a row he's said it in his sleep and we don't have sex any more. I don't push him and he's glad to not have to deal with it." Jim was trying to remain strong because, after all, Jim Ellison wasn't going to breakdown and cry in the middle of a restaurant. 

"Jim, you need to speak with him about it. You owe it to him," 

"Connor, he blames me. It won't be long and he'll be gone." Jim's head was hanging now. 

"I have to run to the restroom, I'll be right back. Hold that thought." Connor took off for the bathroom. Once inside she pulled her cell phone out and called Sandy. 

"Sandburg." 

"Sandy, where are you?" 

"I'm at the station, Connor. Where are you and Jim?" 

"We're at Kung Pow's on Central. Will you join us?" Connor was trying not to make it sound urgent. 

"Connor, is something wrong with Jim?" 

"No, nothing's wrong. I just miss you." 

"You miss me?" Blair sat there thinking for a moment. 

"Sandy, are you coming or not?" 

"Yeah, I'll be there in a minute. Order me Shrimp and Snow Peas with steamed rice, not fried." Blair put the phone down and went to tell Simon he was leaving. 

Connor walked back to the table and caught the eye of the waitress and said, "Could I order something to go, also?" 

"Yes, what do you need?" she asked sweetly. 

Connor put in the order and then looked over at Jim. "You're taking Blair lunch?" 

"Well, he'll be hungry when he gets through at Court. Now tell me more about what we were talking about." Connor was putting her best mate face on now and hoped Blair would get here soon. 

"If you had a chance, would you sleep with me?" 

"Ellison, that's a bad question. I'm your friend and I'm Sandy's friend, so I guess not." 

As they talked, Jim was getting more and more upset thinking about all of this. Connor looked over his shoulder and saw Sandy standing there wondering why the Sentinel didn't hear him anymore. 

"So, Jim, why would you want to sleep with me?" 

"Because I want to see if anyone would want me any more," Jim said sorrowfully. 

"Ellison, Sandy adores you." 

"Not anymore. He blames me and he doesn't love me anymore," Jim broke down and started crying softly. Blair slid into the booth with him and held him close. 

"Hey, big man. I love you more than breathing. Want to tell me what this is about?" Blair looked into his lover's pain filled eyes. 

"For ten day's you've been blaming me in your nightmares." Jim was sobbing harder now. 

"So you're blaming me for what's going on in my nightmares?" 

Jim stopped crying and blew his nose. "I need to get back to work." 

"Fuck work. We're going to discuss this. What do I say every night?" 

"No. No. Please no. Jim, help me. NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jim said quietly. 

"You've been listening to me say this ten nights in a row and it didn't occur to you that we might need some help?" Blair was angry and Jim knew this would be the beginning of the end. 

"Chief, I need to leave. Would you move?" 

"Don't let him go, Sandy. I'm telling you he looked like this a few times while you were inside and..." 

"Shut up, Connor, just shut up," Jim growled. 

"What are you talking about, Connor?" Blair had to know now. 

"Nothing, she's sticking her nose in where it doesn't belong," Jim snapped. 

“Jim, she’s just being a friend. Now, let’s go back to the loft and talk,” Blair suggested. 

Blair and Megan rode together, Jim raced home all by himself. 

@@@@@ 

When they all sat down at the loft, they had many things to discuss. But they actually did it as adults. Things weren’t always going to be hard for the three of them, just for awhile yet. 

@@@@@

 **Day 80**

At work, Blair made a number of calls and finally got a place that had group therapy three times a week for sexual abuse survivors and their families. Blair told them there would be three of them and wrote down the address. 

"Chief, please tell me you didn't invite Harper to the group session tonight," Jim asked. 

"Okay," Blair continued typing. 

"Okay, what?" 

"Okay, I won't tell ya." Blair smiled over at his love, but didn't get a smile back. 

"I'm not going, Sandburg. I didn't want to go anyhow, but now I really don't want to go." Jim stood up and walked into the break room. 

Harper followed him in and said, "Ellison, Meyers and I need some therapy too. We just figured it would work since we all know everything about each other." Harper got himself a soda while he waited for Jim to yell. 

"Fine, but don't think I'm going to say anything." Jim walked out of the room and sat back at his desk. 

"Were you mature?" Blair asked in all seriousness. 

"Yes, I'm going, but I'm not talking." 

"Oh yeah. That's way mature. I'm so glad I thought of therapy," Blair said sadly. 

"I'll try to work on my attitude, Chief. Sorry." Jim then went back to work to take his mind off of things. 

That evening Connor met them at the loft and they all drove to Rainier together. "Is anyone else nervous?" Connor asked. 

"I am." Blair wasn't afraid of his feelings. 

"Well, I'm not. I just think it's stupid," Jim growled as he drove. 

"I'm glad to see you're in the mood for this, Ellison," Connor said laughing. 

"Admit it, Jim, you're nervous," Blair teased. 

"Fine, I'm nervous. I hate you sometimes." Jim looked over at him to be sure he knew he was joking. 

"I know you love me, Jim, don't worry about it." 

"How did you know that's what he was thinking?" Connor asked. 

"He gets these looks on his face that tell me he's scared that I'll be upset or hurt by something he says. So I watch for those looks and stop him before he gets too wild." Blair touched Jim's face as he was talking. 

"I feel like I'm going to throw-up," Jim snarled. 

"It'll be fine, Jim. Wait till we actually get there to throw up, all right?" 

"Sandy, you are so much fun. I'm glad I have you two to hang with." Connor was laughing. 

"I was serious," Jim said quietly and he pulled over to the side of the road and opened his door and threw up. 

"What caused that, Sandy?" 

"Well, I don't fucking know. Jim never throws up. What's going on, Jim?" 

I told you it's this group thing. I don't want to go. I don't want to listen and I don't want to talk." Jim shut the door and began to drive again. 

"Fine, just drop Connor and me off and we'll do it alone." Blair wasn't trying to make him feel guilty. He honestly didn't know what to do. 

When he pulled into the parking lot he found a spot and parked. "Can you pick us up in a couple of hours, man?" Blair was starting to get out of the truck. 

"No, I'm going with you. If you can do it, so can I," Jim walked up to him and put his arm around the younger man's shoulders. 

"And if you need to puke, Jim, it's not that embarrassing. I mean we've all puked, right?" Connor offered. 

When they walked down the hall to the room for the group, Jim made a dash for the bathroom. 

"Sandy, that's weird." 

"Tell me about it. The man never throws up. I'm worried. Sometimes therapy isn't good for the soul." Blair leaned against the wall waiting for Jim to join them. 

When he joined them, he was white as a sheet. Blair looked at him and said, "You want to go home, Jim?" 

"No, I'll be fine. I'm sorry, babe. I don't mean to worry you." Jim leaned down and kissed Blair's neck. He didn't want to kiss him on the lips. Gross. 

They walked into the room and the only other people were Harper and Meyers. 

"Where is everyone else?" Blair asked the woman standing there. 

"Hi. I'm Doctor Linda Marshall. When I talked to you, I figured since you're all familiar with each other, you could just share the group with one another. There won't be anyone joining us." 

"Hi, Doctor Marshall. I'm Blair Sandburg," Blair shook her hand and moved over so that Jim and Connor could do the same. 

"Jim Ellison, ma'am." 

"Megan Connor. But everyone just calls me Connor. And by the way, I call Blair, Sandy, so you'll know and not be confused." 

"Well, it's great to meet all of you. Sit down and relax, everyone," Doctor Marshall said. "Who would like to start?" 

No one said a word. Thankfully, she had paperwork on them. She knew most of what happened. 

"All right, I'll get you started. Meyers, how are you handling the fact that your lover was with someone else because he was undercover?" 

"I'm getting better every day. I think it just takes time. Harp is a great lover and he's really patient with me. So I'm sure everything will be all right." Meyers hoped he wouldn't have to say anything else. 

"Who's next?" 

"Fine, I'll go next." Blair hated the tension of waiting, "We're doing well, too, but we have a lot of obstacles to cross before we're fully healed.” 

"Such as?" Doctor Marshall asked. 

"Well, he needs to get over hating Harper. He's a good guy and doesn't deserve to be treated like shit." Blair said this so quietly, it was almost a whisper. 

"Chief, this is why I didn't want to come." 

"Are you going to sit there and say you don't hate him?" 

"Yeah, I fucking hate his guts. He took something from you that is only mine, but not anymore," Jim was starting to shake. 

"Talk to me, Ellison," Harper stood up and looked right into Jim's face. 

"Fine, you want talk. You'll get talk. Every time I see you talking to Blair, it rips my heart out. I can actually see you fucking him in my mind. And what's really sick, is that you fuck him so well that he likes it." 

"You are so full of shit, Ellison. You know it wasn't like that. He hated it. He was crying for you." Harper had tears rolling down his face and wiped at them, like they were some inconvenience. 

"Oh yeah, well if it was so god-awful, why can't I move on then? I think it's because you feel like you're his guardian. You're not. I'm his fucking guardian and you took away that job. I loved that job." Jim went down on his knees and started crying. 

Harper went down next to him and said, "God, don't do this. He loves you so much, Ellison. Love him; don't hurt him. And please forgive me." 

Then both men were sobbing. Blair was crying too, but silently. Connor had a hold on him until Jim got his shit together. 

"So, Meyers, how does this make you feel?" Doctor Marshall asked. 

"It makes me feel like shit. See, I'm still somewhat angry about him doing that to Sandburg but I know that he wouldn't have done it if he wasn't on the job," Meyers said calmly. 

"And seeing your lover cry doesn't upset you?" 

"Of course it upsets me. I'm just not big on crying in front of people. Harp isn't either, usually." 

Harp got up from the floor and took Meyers into his arms and held him tight. Meyers started to cry and said, "I'm sorry, Harp. I love you so much. I'm trying to get over all of this." 

Everyone got settled back into their chairs and Doctor Marshall asked Blair, "So how do you feel about that night you were undercover?" 

"There are times when I hate Harper and Jim. First of all, I felt like I was raped because I had no choice. I don't care who did it; it's still rape. So for that reason I hate Harp and I hate Jim because he wasn't there to help me and protect me." 

Harper started to cry again. Jim's walls went up and wasn't saying or showing anything. 

"Blair, don't you think that's a little unfair to both of these men? Were either of them in control of the situation?" 

"No..." 

"Then how could they be blamed?" 

"My brain and my heart don't always agree with each other. Harper is a good man and I know he wouldn't hurt me on purpose. I'm sorry, Harp," Blair said. 

"Sandburg, you don't have to apologize. That's what this group is for," Harp said in between sobs and hiccups. 

"Jim, do you think that Blair blames you for not protecting him?" 

"Yes..." 

"Would you like to talk about it?" 

"No..." 

"Maybe next week we can get you to say a little more." Doctor Marshall turned to Connor and said, "Now, tell me why you're here, Megan." 

"Well, I'm here because they're all my friends. I don't want to see them hurt. And I was hoping to learn how to help someone when they are self-destructive." 

"Who would this be, Megan?" 

"It's me. She caught me trying to eat my gun while Blair was in prison and she won't let it go," Jim spat out. 

"I would have died if you did. I was in charge of keeping him alive and he kept scaring me. I think I just need to know how to handle these things better. I wasn't much of a help." Connor looked at Jim sadly. 

"I'm here, Connor." Jim smiled at her and then he hugged her. 

"Megan, I think you must have done a good job to keep him alive and full of life, love and hope. You did just fine, right, Jim?" 

"Yes, she did a fine job. She's my best mate." Jim kept hugging her. 

"Now, Blair, we really need to get you talking more about all of this. Our time is up tonight. So, in two days we'll meet again and I'd like you all to prepare a statement." 

"A statement?" Jim wondered aloud. 

"Yes, you're going to tell each person what you like about them and what upsets you about them. Then we'll have an open discussion. In the meantime, I want you all to take care and we'll set aside two hours for next time." 

They all said goodbye to her and walked out to the parking lot. 

On the drive home, Connor finally broke the silence and said, "Sandy, will you help me do the statement?" 

"Connor, I don't even know what I'm going to say myself, let alone help you write yours." 

"I'll help you, Connor." Jim pulled into the lot and parked. 

Connor got out and Blair said, "What's up with you and Connor?" 

"Chief, don't even go there. You know there's nothing going on." Jim walked up the stairs to the loft. 

Connor left waving at Sandburg. Blair knew that there was nothing going on. He didn't know why he did that to Jim. Shit, he needed the therapy as much as Jim did.

 

When he walked into the loft he smiled at Jim and said, "I'm more screwed up than you are. I'm sorry I said that downstairs. Have patience with me, Jim," Blair went into the big man's arms and held on for dear life. 

"I'll be here forever, Blair, because there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. And I will always need you. Always," Jim kissed him sweetly and led him up the stairs. 

Both men knew there was going to be a long road to recovery, but they both knew that it would be worth it. 

@@@@@

Ellison wasn't looking forward to the next session with Doctor Marshall. They had to think up things they liked or didn't like about each other. Jim could only see ugliness coming from this assignment. 

Jim looked down at his paper and sighed. There was nothing written yet. 

**Things I like about Blair:**

He's a great cop.   
He sucks cock like no one else.   
He fucks me hard.   
He lets me fuck him whenever I want to.   
He looks nice.   
He looks damn nice.   
He has a fine ass.   
He has a gorgeous cock.   
He cooks really healthy. (Wait this one might go in the hate one.)   
He types up my reports at work and doesn't complain about it.   
He talks to me and soothes my bad moods right away.   
He loves me, or at least he used to. 

Things I hate about Blair: 

He makes me cry a lot lately and I hate crying.   
He's messy.   
He fucking blames me for Harper fucking him.   
He gave up his life for me and hasn't looked at me the same since.   
He doesn't love me like he used to.   
He doesn't need me.   
He's moving away from me, I can tell.   
He doesn't hold me in bed anymore.   
He blames me for everything.   
Jim moved on to Connor next. 

Things I like about Connor: 

She saved my life.   
She's my best mate.   
She listens when no one else does.   
She worries about me all the time.   
She's like another brother I always wanted. (Connor would kick my ass for this.)   
She's a great cop. 

Things I hate about Connor: 

She saved my life.   
She hovers around me.   
She won't leave me alone anymore. 

Moving on to Harper: 

Things I like about Harper: 

He saved Blair.   
He's good to Meyers.   
He's a good cop.   
He's a good neighbor. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He saved Blair.   
He's so perfect.   
He's too big, that I can't kick his ass. 

Meyers was up next: 

Things I like about Meyers: 

He's a gentle soul, but don't mess with Harper.   
He's nice to everyone.   
He cooks well.   
He's a good cop.   
He's a good neighbor. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

He's too forgiving. 

Jim decided that he'd do one on himself, too, just in case. He didn't want to be unprepared. Yeah, like you're going to let anyone read this shit. 

Things I like about Jim: 

Things I hate about Jim: 

He's weak.   
He cries like a wuss all the time.   
He needs a wuss puss room.   
He wasn't there to help Blair.   
He can't beat up Harper.   
He puked before the therapy session.   
He probably won't be able to keep Blair happy. (LOSER)   
He wants to kill himself and he's very angry with Connor for stopping him. Now he has to start all over again. 

Jim put his papers inside his folder and went to lie down. He heard Blair get home and heard him on the computer. 

@@@@@

Blair Sandburg's Friends List. 

Things I like about Harper: 

He saved my ass, literally.   
He's very protective.   
He's nice.   
He doesn't know anyone watches, but I love when he smiles at Meyers.   
He's a great neighbor.   
He's a great friend. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He fights with Jim.   
He fucked me.   
He came inside of me when he knew I didn't want it. 

Things I like about Meyers: 

He's a great cook.   
He's a fantastic listener.   
He's so forgiving.   
He always smiles for everyone.   
He's just a really nice guy. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

He might hate me because of what happened.   
He hates Jim. 

Things I like about Connor: 

She's my best friend.   
She's fun.   
She's kind.   
She's a good cop.   
She's always trying to get sex from Jim and me.   
She saved Jim's life.   
She was there for Jim while I was away.   
She loves to drink and eat with us.   
She loves to have a good time. 

Things I hate about Connor: 

She might be in love with Jim.   
She knows that Jim's in love with her. 

Things I like about Jim: 

He's a beautiful person, inside and out.   
He's in love with me.   
He's strong.   
He's a good cop.   
He's a good friend to everyone. 

Things I Hate about Jim: 

He's in love with Connor.   
He wants to leave me, but is afraid.   
He will never forgive me.   
He knows I'll never forgive him.   
He's going to die; I can feel it. 

@@@@@

Across town, Connor was sitting at her computer compiling her list for the session. 

Things I like about Jim: 

He's strong.   
He's a good cop.   
He's handsome.   
He's a good best mate.   
He's good to Sandy.   
He tells me things that he doesn't tell anyone else. 

Things I hate about Jim: 

He has me worried to this day about him taking his own life.   
He needs to forgive Harper.   
He needs to forgive himself.   
He needs to forgive Simon.   
He won't sleep with me and I'm horny as all get out. 

Things I like about Sandy: 

He's one of the sweetest people I've ever met.   
He cooks really well.   
He's very handsome.   
He smells nice all the time.   
He's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Sandy: 

He's gay. Damn him. 

Things I like about Harper: 

He's very nice looking.   
He's very strong and tall.   
He's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He hurt Sandy.   
He hurt my best mate. 

Things I like about Meyers: 

He's super nice.   
He cooks really well.   
He's really nice to Sandy.   
He's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

He's also gay. 

Things I like about Connor: 

She's attractive.   
She's nice.   
She's a good best mate.   
She'd make a really great mom. 

She's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Connor:   
She wants to sleep with Jim Ellison.   
She wants to have a baby in the worst way.   
She wants it to be Jim's.   
She's supposed to be his best mate. 

@@@@@

Meyers, do you have your list done yet for tonight?" Harper asked as he was digging through the drawer for paper and pen. 

"Yeah, I'm done already. Don't sweat about it. It's just for us to do. It's not like anyone's going to read them." Meyers kissed him as he handed him a paper and pen. 

Thanks, babe. I'll get this done and then we'll go out for dinner," Harper sat down and began his list; 

Things I like about Connor: 

She's pretty.   
She's a good cop.   
She's friendly to everyone.   
She's very loyal to Jim.   
She loves both Jim and Blair.   
She's always nice to Meyers and me. 

Things I hate about Connor: 

She nags at all of us too much. 

 

Things I like about Sandburg: 

He's a nice guy.   
He's a good cop.   
He's very kind to Meyers. 

Things I hate about Sandburg: 

He won't forgive me.   
He thinks I raped him.   
He might be right.   
He's going to drive Jim away. 

Things I like about Ellison: 

He's a good cop.   
He loves Sandburg.   
He loves Connor. 

Things I hate about Ellison: 

He'll never forgive me.   
He's always trying to get me to fight him.   
He wants me to beat the shit out of him.   
He has a death wish. 

Things I like about Meyers. 

He's the best thing in the world in my life.   
He loves me.   
He loves everyone.   
He's so kind and gentle.   
He's a great cook.   
He's a great listener.   
He's a great cop. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

Not a damn thing. 

 

Things I like about Harper: 

He's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He fucked Sandburg.   
He enjoyed it.   
He came inside of him. 

@@@@@

Meyers decided he would put some finishing touches on his list. Never know who will see it. 

Things I like about Connor: 

She's nice.   
She's a good cop. 

Things I hate about Connor: 

She's mean to Harp sometimes.   
She's mean to Sandburg sometimes.   
She has the hots for Ellison. 

Things I like about Ellison: 

He's a good cook.   
He's a good cop.   
He can be nice to Sandburg now and then. 

Things I hate about Ellison: 

He's a prick to Harp.   
He's mean to Sandburg most of the time.   
He's mean to Connor.   
He's very unhappy.   
He's sad.   
He's confused and I worry about him. 

Things I like about Sandburg: 

He's a great listener.   
He's a super cop.   
He's a great cook.   
He's great to have as a neighbor.   
He's a good friend. 

Things I hate about Sandburg: 

He lets Ellison walk all over him. 

 

Things I like about Harper: 

He's my life.   
He's my love.   
He's funny.   
He's a fantastic cop.   
He loves me.   
He loves life.   
He's a great friend. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He fucked Sandburg and won't get over it. 

Things I like about Meyers: 

He's a good lover.   
He's a good friend.   
He's a decent cop.   
He's faithful.   
He's in love. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

He can't get past this whole undercover thing.   
He needs more attention. 

 

"Why are we writing these again?" Meyers asked. 

"She said it was because we needed to gauge our feelings and these little lists would help." Harper looked over at Meyers and smiled, "Well, I never said it's true. It's just what she said." 

@@@@@

That night, everyone had their notebooks with them as they walked into the room. 

"Hello everyone. Sit down and get comfortable," Doctor Marshall said and then as quick as she could, she picked up all of the notebooks. 

"Wait a minute. Give that back to me. It's private," Jim yelled. 

"Tough. This is how I'll keep track of feelings. I'm the only one that's going to read them. It will give me a place to start. All right, we're going to start with one thing tonight. And we'll see where that takes us," Doctor Marshall looked over the lists quickly for an idea of where to start. 

"I can hardly wait." Jim wasn't a happy camper. 

"Jim, give it a rest. None of us want her to know the stuff we put on those lists," Blair said, rubbing Jim's arm firmly. 

"Okay, here we go. Now everyone can say something, but one at a time. Jim, the first one will be you. I need you to talk to Harper about how you really feel about what happened while undercover," she just sat and waited for the blow-up called Ellison. 

"Harper, I put on my list that I hate you because you saved Blair." Jim looked at the floor waiting for Harper's reply. 

"I don't understand, Jim. Why would you hate me because I saved him?" 

"Because he doesn't love me the same way anymore. Now he knows that anyone can save him and it changed everything." Jim hated therapy and now he really hated it. 

"Jim, you're so full of shit. You hate Harper because he saved Sandy? Tell us why you really hate him." Connor wasn't pulling any punches. 

"Yeah, this I'd like to hear, too," Meyers said. 

"Fine, I hate you for saving him the way you did? Did you have to fuck him? God, you're a big guy, couldn't you have just taken him away?" 

"Now we're getting somewhere," Connor said softly. 

"So you hate me because I fucked him, right?" 

"Yes. And what really bothers me is you're a great guy. I like you. You're a great cop, but you fucked the man I loved." Jim was starting to shake. 

"Excuse me... I hate to be an asshole here, but you just said you loved. Not love, but loved. You don't love me anymore?" Blair had big tears in his eyes. 

"Chief, that came out wrong. I'm sorry. I do love you. I meant to say the man I love," Jim quickly added. 

Blair jumped out of his chair and began to pace. Everyone watched him as he blew his nose and wiped tears from his face. "You don't love me anymore, do you, Jim?" 

"Chief, you know that's bullshit. I love you. I'll always love you." Jim tried to go towards Blair but he wouldn't let the larger man get close to him. 

"Sit down, Jim. I don't want you touching me right now." Blair leaned into the wall and watched as Jim left his side. How easily he does that these days. 

"Did you stop loving him because of what happened?" Harper asked Jim. 

"No, I love him. Why are you all saying I don't love him?" Jim put his head in his hands and fought off the urge to cry his heart out. 

"I didn't say it, Jim. I think you love him, but you're letting the hate of what happened get in the way of your pure love," Connor almost whispered sitting next to him. 

"Harper, I'll work on how I feel about you. Okay? I'm sorry for feeling this way." Jim looked to be one of the saddest people on earth right then. 

"It's okay to hate me. You don't have to like me, Jim. We don't need to be best buds, after all." Harper had tears in his eyes as he said it. 

"When you fucked him what were you thinking?" Jim asked quietly. 

"What do you mean? I was thinking about getting done with it so we could get away from them." Harper tried to stay calm. 

"That's not what I asked. What were you thinking about him while you fucked him?" Jim was getting overly anxious. 

"Jim, I don't remember." 

"Fuck you, you remember everything else. Now what were you thinking?" 

"I was thinking how good he felt. I was thinking how this was an awful thing but I was so glad I got to fuck him. Happy now?" Harper stood up and was crying. 

Jim heard Blair crying over in the corner so he went to him first. "Chief?" 

"God, you have to let it go, Jim. I didn't want to hear that." Blair sobbed into Jim's chest. 

"I'm sorry, babe. I'll go and apologize to him now." Jim stood up. 

"You think apologizing to him is going to fix things? Not hardly. You've fucked up our friendships and things will never be the same." Blair was screaming at Jim by this time. 

"Blair, let's not let our tempers get out of control," Doctor Marshall said quickly. 

Jim looked around the room and saw everyone's lives that he had screwed up somehow and took off out the door. He ran all the way to the truck, got in and drove off before anyone had a chance to stop him. 

He was quite surprised when he found himself in front of Simon's house. He went to the door and knocked. 

"Hey, Jim. What's wrong? Come on in," Simon said, pulling his friend through the doorway. 

"Can I put my pickup in your garage?" 

"Why?" 

"Because I don't want Connor or Blair to know where I'm at. Could I stay the night?" 

"Yeah, let's get your truck in the garage first and then I'll get you settled in Daryl's room." Simon pulled his car out and Jim pulled the truck in and they walked back into the house. 

"Do you want to talk, Jim?" 

"No. Maybe tomorrow, Simon?" 

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow then." 

"Thanks, Simon." Jim hugged him quickly and moved into Daryl's room. 

@@@@@

Doctor Marshall said, "All right, I don't want to alarm anyone but Jim has death fantasies. Where would he go if he left here?" 

"He's a big boy. He's probably home, pouting," Blair growled. 

"Sandy, that's so unlike you. Jim loves you to death. Is that what it's going to take? For him to die to show you how much he loves you?" Connor was screaming at Blair by this time. 

"Fuck you, Connor. You just want him for yourself," Blair screamed back. 

"That might be true, but he doesn't love me. God, knows I would love him to." 

"Back to the question, isn't anyone worried about him?" Doctor Marshall seemed to be quite upset. 

"Can I please see his paper, Doc?" Harper held his hand out and was shocked when she put the paper in it. 

Harper read the paper and sat down hard on the chair. He passed it to Meyers and Meyers was in total shock, too. Connor read it next and started to cry. Blair walked over and read it and walked out of the room. Harper followed him down the hall and said, "Sandburg, what are you doing?" 

"God, he does love me. Did you read the things he said about me. He thinks I'm wonderful. I'm a fucking prick. I've been so worried about me that I never thought about him. He's probably killing himself somewhere. God, how did I miss that? He's suicidal, isn't he?" 

"Yeah, I think so. It's not too late. Let's all go and find him." Harper grabbed Blair and pulled him back the other way. 

"Why?" Blair asked. 

"Why what?" 

"Why are you going to help us find him? You told him tonight that you didn't need to be friends," Blair looked up at Harper, really needing to know. 

"Because I don't want to tell him but I like him a lot. He's been a good friend. Good friends are hard to come by." Harper opened the door to the room and they found everyone ready and waiting. 

"We'll meet on Friday. Go and find your friend and we'll try and get past some of this as time goes on," Doctor Marshall was talking but no one was really listening. 

Out in the parking lot, Connor said, "Did you all see the section about Things I like about Jim? Did you see it was empty? Did this break anyone else's heart?" 

Blair started to sob quietly as he walked to Connor's car. Meyers hugged him and said, "We'll get to him, Blair. Harper likes him a lot. He just doesn't want anyone to know." 

Harper took Meyers aside and said, "I'm going to go to Captain Bank's house and I need you to go with Sandburg and Connor. Keep them away from there, in case there is anything bad." 

"Okay. Talk to you later?" 

"Of course you'll talk to me later. I love you." Harper leaned down and gave his man a nice kiss before he drove off. 

"Where's Harper going?" Blair asked. 

"He's got a case to look into. But he told me that we're supposed to go to Brown's apartment first, and follow up with Rafe's. Ready?" Meyers got into the back seat and waited for Connor and Sandburg to join him. 

"Brown's apartment, it is," Connor said as she drove out of the lot. 

Simon had been watching a movie in peace and quiet when there was a knock at the door. He opened it and saw Harper. "What do you want, Harper?" 

"I need to see Jim right now. I know his truck is in the garage. It's important or I wouldn't be bothering you with it. It's a matter of life and death," Harper said the last word with emphasis. 

"First room to the left, down the hallway." Simon had a feeling something was worse than wrong. 

"Thank you, sir." 

"Don't let him hurt himself." Simon sat down with a lost look on his face. 

Harper walked into the bedroom and saw the moonlight shining on Jim Ellison, and in that moonlight glow, he also saw a gun underneath Jim's chin. Harper casually walked over and said, "Don't do this to him. He loves you. Hell, I love you." 

"Leave me alone. I'm a fucking mess." Jim hand was shaking, thankfully, which made Harper think he wouldn't go through with it. 

"Well, at least say goodbye to him, okay? I'll get him on the phone now." Harper dialed Meyers phone and asked for Sandburg. 

"Fuck you," Ellison whispered. 

"Back at ya, pal. Now here's Blair." 

"Jim?" 

"Yeah, Chief, it's me. I'm fine. Stop worrying so much. Your heart is beating way too fast." As soon as Jim said it he knew he had made a mistake. 

"So you're all right?" 

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just sitting here shooting the breeze with Harper," Jim glared at Harp. 

"Can I talk to Harp for a second, Jim?" 

"He wants to talk to you." Jim handed the phone to him. 

"Hey, Sandburg. What do you need?" 

"Is he holding a gun to his head?" 

"Yes." 

"Oh fuck, give him back to me." Blair was frantic now. 

"Here you go, he wants you now." Harper handed the phone over and stood by the door. 

"Jim, do you love me? Or did you stop loving me after this?" 

"I'll love you forever, Chief. Forever." 

"So you love me right now?" 

"Yes, I love you." Jim wondered when Blair had lost brain cells. 

"Jim, do you love me enough to give the gun to Harper?" 

"Nope." 

Blair started to cry, making the most heartbreaking sound Jim had ever heard. "Everyone will blame me Jim. They'll all hate me. God, they'll probably kill me at the station." 

"No one would ever hurt you, Blair. Everyone loves you. Besides, Harper will watch out for you." 

"Jim..." Blair sobbed out, "I don't want to be with him. He doesn't love me like you do. He doesn't touch me like you do. God, don't leave me." 

Harper walked over to Jim and said, "I'm done, Jim. I'm not babysitting your fuck buddy." 

Jim threw the phone and his gun down and jumped on Harper's back. Both men went down and were fighting the good fight. For every punch Jim got, Harp got one back. Simon opened up the door and said, "Do I have to get the damn hose?" 

Jim started to get up and Harper held on to him tightly. "NO! You're not leaving me. Just stay here. I want to talk to you." 

"Simon, could you pick up our guns and take them out of here, please?" Harper said it so sweetly that to the naked eye and ear you would think nothing was up. "Oh, and would you grab that phone and tell Sandburg that I've got him?" 

Simon got the guns and the cell phone and left the room. He heard crying that sounded a lot like Ellison but then he heard crying that didn't sound like him. Why would Harper be crying? 

"Ellison, I love you," Harper said it so quietly that even the Sentinel had a hard time hearing it. 

"What are you talking about?" 

"I love you." 

"I heard what you said. I just want to know why you would ever love me," Jim looked totally confused. 

"I love you because you've been trying so hard to make all of this work. You seem to think you have to take care of everyone. Always looking out for each and every one of us. What we all missed was that you needed to have someone look out for you, too. I love the way you look at Sandburg. We all think that you're just perfect together. I love the way you accepted me as a friend when I saved Blair in the locker room at the station. You were jealous but you still accepted me. I love how kind you are to my lover. Even when you're mad at me, you're never mean to Mey. I loved your paper that you wrote and likes and dislikes for everyone. The only thing that bothered me was that you had nothing for what you like about Jim Ellison. There is so much to like about Jim Ellison. Want a list? 

"He's kind.   
"He's a great cop.   
"He's a great friend.   
"He's a great lover.   
"He's fun.   
"He's fun to tease.   
"He's my friend.   
"He's everyone's friend.   
"He's loved.   
"He's needed." 

Harper felt the crying start to get harder and held on tight. "Jim, we'll get through this. Don't you worry, okay?" 

When Blair finally arrived about an hour later, Jim and Harper were sound asleep on the floor in each other's arms. Blair covered them up with a quilt and was going to leave when Jim said, "Chief, don't leave me." 

Blair snuggled up to him on the floor and they fell asleep again. In the morning Blair woke up to no one on the floor. "Shit..." 

"I'm in the bathroom, Chief. Don't freak out," Jim called from the bathroom. 

Blair walked in and saw Harper in the shower while Jim was shaving. "I'm not looking, Chief." 

Blair went into his arms and Jim could feel the shaking. "Hey, I'm going to go see a special shrink. Someone better than what we've seen. Sound good to you?" 

"We could see one together, couldn't we?" Blair asked shyly. 

"Yeah, we could. But just you and me, and I get to choose the doc this time," Jim said smiling. 

"Excuse me, guys, could you get the hell out so I can get out of the shower?" Harper said laughing as he climbed out of the shower stall. 

Once they were in the kitchen Blair said, "Wait till you hear what Connor put on that list about you." 

"What?" 

"She wanted you to fuck her and have your baby." Blair was giggling by this time. 

"She wasn't serious, was she?" 

"I don't know. Why?" Blair looked over at his lover with confusion written all over his face. 

"It's just embarrassing. Now every time I look at her I'm going to think she wants to jump my bones." Jim was up and pacing. 

"Well what if she was serious? Would you be interested?" 

"Hell, no! But I think we should tell her up front that we can't do that. The baby part, maybe, but not fuck her." Jim turned around to find his lover smiling at him. 

"I told her you would say that. God, do I know you or what?" 

"Hey, where's Simon?" 

"Who cares?" Blair jumped up and wrapped his legs around Jim's waist and began to kiss him like there was no tomorrow. 

Jim pulled back and whispered, "I love you so much, Chief. I won't ever leave you." 

@@@@@

For the next two months, Jim and Blair continued to go to therapy with a really good doctor. One that knew he'd have to use cuffs on them sometimes. They started dating at the doctor's request. Three times a week, they asked each other out on dates. And they were holding off on sex for the big day. 

When they walked into Doctor Walker's office, they were both smiling. They had a feeling it might be the end of therapy, as they knew it. 

"Hi, Jim. Hi, Blair," Doctor Walker began, "how are you both doing today?" 

"I'm a little horny, but other than that I'm doing fine," Blair said, with an evil smile. 

"I'm doing great. The weather has been gorgeous. I love not having to deal with rain for a while. I feel great!" Jim had a huge smile on his face. 

"Now, if you have trouble, what will you do?" Walker asked. 

"Call you first thing," Blair said. 

"Call you first thing," Jim repeated. 

"Good, just so that's clear. Now I think you're both ready to move on. You've both done really well and I'm proud of you," Walker said. 

"Can we go, really?" Jim had a big smile lighting up his face. 

"Yup. Get out of here. Oh, and your friends called and said to meet them at the Pub. They said you'd know what they meant." Walker opened up the door and watched the two happy men leave his office. 

As soon as he shut the door, he said very quietly, "All right." 

Jim heard him and smiled even more as they walked to the truck. They knew they were going to have sex but they also knew that they had friends planning this party. 

"Jim, do you suppose we could have sex in the stall in the bathroom while we're there? I'm really warm for your form." Blair couldn't help laughing as Jim almost drove off the road. 

Jim hadn't a clue as to how serious Blair was about bathroom sex at the Pub but he would find out. 

Once they arrived, everyone yelled for them and they danced, drank and ate food most of the evening. Blair stood up and said, "Jim, will you be sure I make it there in one piece?" 

"Make it where, Sandburg?" 

"To the bathroom," Blair said with that evil smile again. 

"I'll be there in five minutes," Jim said as he pushed Blair away from him. Honestly? His dick was trying to lift the table up. Connor slid in and said, "I think he's waiting, Jim." 

"Fuck, does everyone know what we're going to do?" Jim frowned. 

"Hell, yes, and we're behind you all the way," Connor said, moving out of the booth leaving it open for Jim to leave. Which he did. 

When he walked into the bathroom, he was attacked by one very horny partner. "Stall, Chief. Stall." 

"Is that something you want to do? Stall?" 

"No, in a stall. Come on." Jim pulled him in and quickly opened Blair's jeans and shirt. "It's been so long, baby." He went down on his knees and started sucking his lover off. Jim had some lube in his pocket, so he put some on his finger and started playing with Blair's ass. And just like that Blair came with a loud scream. 

"Sorry, Jim. I didn't mean to be so vocal. It's been a long time," Blair panted and tried to get his breath back. 

Jim slid a second finger into Blair's ass and got him nice and loose. By the time Jim had the third one in there Blair was hard again and begging for something to happen. 

Two guys walked into the bathroom at that moment and were talking about the game while at the urinal. 

Blair whispered, "So are you going to fuck me or not?" 

The old Jim would have been worried, but this Jim needed to fuck Blair so badly that he entered Blair in one swoop making Blair cry out. Jim leaned in and asked, "Did I hurt you?" 

"Move it, big man, or I'll have to kick your ass," Blair moved his rear end forward and then moved it back again. Jim was moaning by this time and the men in the bathroom said, "Stupid fags." 

As Jim was pounding into Blair he called out, "We're not stupid." 

Blair started to laugh for a few moments and then stopped when he got close again. "Jim, come in me. Come on. I want to come with you coming in me." 

Jim did just that. He let out a howl as he came into Blair, over and over again. He felt like he hadn't had sex in years. And then Blair was coming, milking his cock of anything that was left. 

"I love you," Jim said out loud. 

"Ya think?" Blair teased. 

They cleaned each other off and went back out to the bar. Everyone knew what they had done, but they had the decency not to bring it up to their faces. 

"Hey, you guys, want to hear what happened in the bathroom?" Blair asked. 

"No." Simon said quickly. 

"Simon, man, not that. I mean what someone said." Blair laughed. 

"Oh, well, sure. What did someone say?" Simon asked, having no idea he was walking into the Sandburg zone with no protection. 

"Well, Jim was fucking me and these two guys heard it. The one guy says to the other guy, "Stupid fags." 

Simon spit beer all over Joel. "Sorry, Joel. That's it, Sandburg?" 

"No, so anyhow, he says stupid fags and Jim doesn't even miss a beat with fucking me and said, "We're not stupid." 

Everyone in the place started laughing. 

"Why do I set myself up for these things?" Simon asked no one in particular. 

"Because, Simon, they're so damn funny. Even if you say you don't want to hear about it, you know that we really do. There is something about them that just makes you feel great." Joel loved those boys. 

"Hey, Connor, want to come over for dinner tomorrow?" Jim asked. 

"That would be nice. Thank you." 

"Man, I wish someone would invite us to dinner." Harper smiled over at the happy couple. 

"Chief, how many do you want for dinner tomorrow?" Jim asked. 

"Just Connor. Then we're going to have Harper and Meyers over the next night if that's okay with them." 

"Cool, I don't have to cook that night," Meyers said going into Harper's arms. Then he started laughing making Harper look at him. "I was just thinking about Ellison saying, 'we're not stupid'. You have to admit, Harp, that's pure Sandburg trained, Ellison." 

Everyone continued talking, drinking and eating until closing time. When they all left it was with a light heart, knowing that Sandburg and Ellison were once again a team. They were on top of their game and they were happy. 

@@@@@

The following night Connor showed up at the loft, nervous. She had no idea why she was asked over for dinner and no one else. 

Jim opened up the door before she knocked and she almost fell in. "Hey, Connor. Have too much to drink?" 

"Oh shut up. Where's Sandy?" 

Blair popped up from where he had been looking for a pan. "Evening, Connor." 

"Jesus, he sounds like someone in a western." Megan went over and kissed him on the cheek and handed him the wine. 

They sat down for dinner and Jim poured the wine. Finally, Connor couldn't take it anymore. "All right. What's going on? Why only me for dinner?" 

"Jim wants to talk to you." 

"Is something wrong?" Connor sounded panicked. 

"No, nothing's wrong but I need to tell you a few things. I used you while Blair was undercover. No, we didn't have sex, but believe me, I thought about it. And I continued to use you, so that I wouldn't be alone. I was an asshole and for this I'm truly sorry. You're a very dear friend and I abused our friendship. I hope you'll find it in your heart to forgive me." Jim took a deep breath once he got it all out. 

"That's it? Geeze, Jim, I wanted to sleep with you non-stop. So don't feel bad about that. Yes, I think we both used each other and that was wrong but we know better from now on. I'm sorry, too," Connor moved her chair over and hugged Jim. 

"Connor, did you still want a baby?" Blair blurted out. 

Connor swallowed her wine wrong and began to choke on it. Jim started hitting her and said, "Connor, you can't have a baby if you're dead." 

"Do you mean it?" 

"It would depend. You can't move back to Australia without our permission. We'd have to go with you, I guess." Jim smiled. 

"Jim and I told the shrink that we wanted a child. He thought it didn't sound like a bad idea. Think on it and get back to us." Blair took a swig of his wine and added, "This is great wine, Connor." 

They spent the rest of the evening just talking and enjoying each other's company. When Connor left late that night Blair made sweet love to Jim. He hadn't had a chance to do that since they finished with the doctor. Jim cried, so Blair knew that he'd done it right. 

The following evening after a long day in the bullpen, Harper and Meyers showed up at their doorstep for dinner. 

Jim opened it up before they knocked and Harper fell into Jim. "That fucking freaks me out." 

"Deal with it, Harp. Hey, Jim." Meyers walked in carrying the wine. 

"Hey, Mey. Thanks for bringing the wine," Jim called out. Blair took the wine and put it in the fridge. "Hey, Mey. How you doing?" 

"Does anyone care how I'm doing?" Harp asked. 

"No...." everyone said in unison. 

Jim helped Blair get everything set at the table and then everyone sat down for dinner. Like the evening before Jim poured the wine. 

"Blair, everything looks wonderful," Meyers said, taking a drink of the wine, "and this wine is great. God, I'm good." 

"It's nice being married to someone so shy and reserved," Harp said, causing everyone to stop eating and look at him. 

"Harp, you just said being married to someone," Mey said, blushing. 

"Well, I think of us as being married. Ellison, don't you think of you and Blair as being married?" 

"Yeah, I do. And I love being married." Jim leaned over and kissed Blair. 

"Me, too!" Harp leaned into Meyers and kissed him long and hard. 

"Get a room you two," Blair teased. 

When dinner was all done, Harp asked, "So what is the deal? Why did you want to see us alone?" 

"Well, I needed to talk to you both and I preferred to do it in private. I hope that's all right." Jim hoped they wouldn't be uncomfortable with his words. 

"By all means, we're here to listen," Harp said. 

"I have my paper with everything I said I liked and didn't like about you guys. Except now it's revised. So I'd like you both to read it. I hope I don't offend either of you in any way," Jim passed the paper to them shyly. 

Things I like about Harper: 

He saved Blair.   
He's good to Meyers.   
He's a good cop.   
He's a good neighbor. 

Things I added, that I like about Harper:   
He's a good friend.   
He saved my life.   
He loves me.   
He's loved by me.   
He looks out for everyone. 

Things I hate about Harper: 

He saved Blair.   
He's so perfect.   
He's too big, so I can't kick his ass. 

Things I added: 

He saved Blair, thank god.   
He's not perfect.   
He is big, but I don't want to kick his ass anymore.   
He should have kicked my ass. 

Meyers was up next: 

Things I like about Meyers: 

He's a gentle soul, but don't mess with Harper.   
He's nice to everyone.   
He cooks well.   
He's a good cop.   
He's a good neighbor. 

Things I added: 

He's a good friend.   
He loves everyone.   
He smiles at Harper cute.   
He thinks that Harper doesn't notice.   
He loves me, even though I'm an asshole. 

Things I hate about Meyers: 

He's too forgiving. 

Things I added: 

There is nothing to add. 

“Meyers, you're a wonderful person and I'm truly blessed to have you as a friend. I'm here for you anytime. I love you and the big lug.” 

Love, Jim

Both men finished reading and looked over at Ellison and smiled. Jim relaxed when he saw the smiles. 

"I love you, too," Harper said quietly. 

"How about some dessert, guys?" Blair asked getting up. 

Harper got up and went into the kitchen with Blair to help. "Hey, you guys are doing great." Then he pulled him into a fierce hug. 

"What brought that on?" Blair asked looking up at him. 

"I just love you guys, that's all. I'm so fucking glad that we're friends." Harper then went into the bathroom. 

Jim looked at Blair and said, "Was it what I said?" 

"No. He's just overcome with emotion and doesn't want to cry in front of us," Blair said smiling. 

"Well, shit! He cries in front of me almost nightly," Meyers said. 

"I heard that, Mey. I'm going to kick your sweet ass." Harper came out of the bathroom and picked his lover up and just held on to him. 

"Again I say, get a fucking room," Blair laughed. 

"Stupid fags." Jim laughed as he watched the look on Harp's face when it hit him. 

"We're not stupid," Harp said, laughing, as he then let go of Mey to help put dessert on the table. 

When they left that night, it was Jim's turn to make sweet love to Blair. This time he made Blair cry, so he must have been doing it right. 

The doctor was right. Every day things would get better. Soon they wouldn't have to cry so often. Everyone would come around and they would all heal. He was right, so Jim and Blair sent him some flowers to say thank you. 

Jim had told Doctor Walker that there was only one thing he was sure about in life and that was that he needed Sandburg. The doctor told Jim he was a smart man. 

@@@@@

 **Six Months Later**

Jim was sitting on the balcony off the living room and trying to cool off. He couldn't remember a time Cascade had ever been this warm for so many days in a row. He held the cool beer bottle up to his forehead and hoped that would cool him off for a bit. 

His damn Sentinel senses made things even worse sometimes. Not that he liked to complain about them. Keep lying to yourself, Ellison. 

Everything seemed hotter than it should be. Jim swore that if he went out into the parking lot without shoes, he would get third degree burns. What kind of an idiot would go with no shoes? 

At that moment Blair came running into the loft, barefoot. "Chief, what are you doing going without shoes?" 

"Lighten up, Jim. I just ran down to get the mail. It's not like I would walk across the tar-covered pavement in the parking lot. Who would be that dumb?" 

"Yeah, you're probably right." Jim tried to go back to cooling off. 

Blair walked out with a bucket of ice water and towels and began to cool Jim down. _Why are you cooling him down, you want him to be hot._ He laughed to himself and Jim said, "What are you laughing about?" 

"You just look so damn sweet. Hold this on your forehead while I answer the door." Blair walked into the loft and Jim was almost asleep. Blair always knew how to relax him. 

I'm the Sentinel, yet he's the one that heard the door. I'm slipping. I need a break. 

Jim was sleeping and felt Blair putting more water on his towel and suddenly there was an ice-cube down his shorts. He howled and jumped up to find Meyers laughing. "Meyers, what the fuck are you doing?" 

Harper came around the corner and said, "Ellison, is he bugging you?" 

"Yes. What are you two doing here anyhow?" Jim mumbled. 

"You would think he's not happy to see us or something." Meyers smiled over to his lover. 

"Jim, I asked Captain Banks if you and Sandburg could get a week off for a vacation and he said yes," Harper was so pleased with himself. 

"Harper, I have work to do. I can't just up and leave," Jim said angrily, walking into the loft. 

"Well, I guess you'll have to surf by yourself, Harp. Sorry about that." Meyers feigned hurt feelings. 

"Where are you going? You're going to be surfing?" Jim's face lit up like a roman candle. 

"Rincon Point, Ventura, California. I worked on a case for a high profile person and he gave me two rooms and four first class airline tickets, paid in full. We thought we'd ask you guys if you wanted to go." Meyers looked over at Blair to see if he seemed interested. He was bouncing on his heels. I guess he wanted to go. 

"Chief?" 

"Jim, it's your call. If your work is that important I don't want to push you on a vacation to somewhere we could only dream of going." Blair smiled over at his lover. 

"You guys are 'so' on." Jim grabbed Blair and hugged him. "When do we leave?" 

"Four days," Meyers yelled as they walked out of the loft. 

"Man, do you believe this? Jim, I've always wanted to go there." Blair was pulling suitcases out of the closet in his old room. He looked over and saw that Jim didn't look near as happy anymore. "What's wrong?" I'm going to kill him; I swear I am. 

"I'm not going to desert you while I go surfing. That would be shitty. We'll go fishing and stuff instead." Jim leaned in for a kiss. 

"Jim, I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself. You don't need to entertain me while we're there. Well, except in bed." Blair finally gave him that kiss. 

"You wouldn't mind if I surfed like one day or something?" 

"Not at all. But if we're going to be there, I want you to do it as much as you can. You'll make it up to me somehow." Blair gave him a shit-eating grin. 

The next four days flew by and found four very happy detectives boarding a plane. "First Class, do you believe it, Jim?" 

"Nah, I think Meyers made that up and they'll toss us out." Jim laughed at the look on Meyers face. 

"He's going to tease me this whole trip, isn't he?" Meyers talked only to Blair now. 

"Don't let him get your goat." 

"Hey! I don't share that damn goat with anyone," Meyers laughed along with Blair. 

"I don't get it," Jim said to Harper. 

"Like I do? We're the old ones, Jim." Harper sat back and seemed to just relax instantly. 

"Would you mind sitting with your partner. I have to be near Harp." Meyers shoved Jim over across the aisle and Jim laughed as he let him. 

_I think this might be a fun vacation._ Was the thought going through all of their minds. 

Waiting for their luggage at the airport in Ventura, the men were all bouncing with excitement. 

"Ellison, you think they'll let us catch a few waves today?" Harper asked in a whisper. 

"I don't see why not. As long as we don't get ourselves killed, I think they'll go along with almost anything." Jim smiled as he walked up to Blair. 

Harper rented an SUV, they all got the luggage and they were packed in for the trip to the hotel. 

"Whoa, nice hotel. It's gorgeous. How far from the beach?" Harper asked. 

"It's right outside our back door, hot shot," Meyers patted his arm softly. 

When they checked in, they found out they were right next door to each other. In fact, they had adjoining rooms. Jim wasn't wild about that but he wasn't going to ruin this for Blair. 

"Man, look at this room. Look at the ocean, Jim. Man, this is beautiful." 

"I couldn't agree with you more, Chief." Jim pulled him in for a much needed hug. 

There was a knock on the adjoining door and Harper walked in, "Hey! Want to catch a wave or two?" 

"Go ahead, Jim. Have fun. Meyers and I will find something to do." Blair kissed him and pushed him towards the bathroom to get ready. 

"Sandburg, you want to soak up rays on the sand?" Meyers called from his room. 

"Sounds good to me." Blair walked into the bathroom and almost laughed. "Gee, that looks comfortable, Jim." 

Jim was trying to get his wet suit on and it wasn't fucking cooperating, at all. "Could you help me, Chief?" 

"Sure." Blair smiled and got Jim into it easily and then slapped his ass as he walked out. "Wear that for me later, okay?" 

"Oh ha ha." Jim tried not to laugh as he walked out of the room where Harper was waiting for him. They grabbed their boards and they were off. "Bye, Chief. Bye, Meyers," Jim called out. 

"Bye, guys, have fun and be safe," Blair called after them. 

"Harp, you be careful or you'll have to answer to me. Did you both remember your sex wax?" Meyers asked seriously. 

Both men stopped and said, "Shit, I forgot." 

Jim ran in the room and grabbed some wax and they were back to the game plan. 

"Sandburg, you want to put some Sunscreen on me and then I'll put some on you?" 

"Sounds good to me." Blair rubbed him down and then Meyers took it from him to rub it into Blair's skin. 

"Ready?" Meyers grabbed some soda's and beer and put them in a cooler. 

"Leave the beers. We don't know if they'll let us have them down there. Just take the sodas." 

"Gotcha. Onward and upward," Meyers said smiling. 

They had their towels ready to go on the hot sand so they could sleep in the sun. 

Once they were settled, they didn't say anything for awhile as they listened to two women talking about their husbands. Both men had their mouths open, because they were discussing anything and everything, including sex. When they left Meyers looked at Blair and said, "Do you believe that?" 

"I think it's kind of neat that they can discuss things like that. I mean, we're all too uptight to do that," Blair replied. 

"Not me. I could do that. I'll start. In the morning, Harper has to have sex or he thinks he'll die in the line of duty. I always tease him about yeah having a boner all day would throw your aim off." Meyers laughed along with Blair. 

"And?" 

"Anyhow, he's got the nicest cock and I love to taste it first thing in the morning. He hates that because he's always afraid he'll piss in my mouth because he has to go so bad." 

Blair was moving closer as he listened. This is fucking good. 

"I keep telling him that wouldn't matter. Anything about him would be fine in my mouth. Then I go down on him and he comes fast and hard. Honestly, we do this every morning." Meyers was fanning himself by this time. 

"Man, that was hot. Now we know why the women talk about this." Blair fanned himself, too. 

"Your turn, Sandburg," 

"I don't know about this," Blair was stalling. 

"Tell me one thing you like the most about Jim's body," Meyers teased. 

"Well, that's easy. His ass. God, he's got the finest ass that was ever put on this earth. I kid you not." Blair not only looked but sounded like a man in love. 

"Well, I told you a lot more than that. That's not fair," Meyers whined. 

"Fine. Okay, in the morning I'm the one that has to have him. Every single morning. I look at that ass and I can't help it. He loves to be tongue fucked first. So that's how we start." 

"Does he ever come from just that?" Meyers asked. 

"Yeah, sometimes. Depends on how horny he is. So anyhow, I start with the tongue fucking and see how long he's going to last. Then I get the lube and start to loosen him up. He knows that I'm not going to fuck him until he starts begging and he begs really good." 

"Oh do tell." Meyers and Blair were now only a few inches apart. 

"He knows I won't let him come or have me in him until he starts telling me certain things," Blair smiled. "Your turn." 

"Fuck it is. Continue, or we end this game," Meyers demanded. 

"He has to say, 'Show me who's Chief,' and once he says that I let him have me and let him come." Blair smiled over at Meyers. 

"Wow, you have a lot of control over him don't you?" 

"You could with Harper, too, he adores you. All you have to do is take charge." Blair smiled over at him before saying, "You're next." 

"I'm not very good at that kind of stuff," Meyers said shyly. 

"Okay, for instance what part of your body does he enjoy the most?" 

"That one's easy. My ass." 

"So don't let him have it until he says sweet things. Tell him what you want and insist on it until he agrees or he gets no ass." Blair loved being evil. 

"I still don't get it. I'm not a very sexy person I don't think." Meyers was now embarrassed. 

"Okay, here is an example. Tell Harper that you like to have your ass touched and kissed before it gets fucked. And then tell him you wouldn't mind having him tell you what he wants to do while he's back there." Blair rubbed Meyers arm. 

"Christ, I'm hard as a rock just thinking about it," Meyers growled. 

"Just hold that thought." Blair could help laughing. "Get it, hold that thought?" 

"I got it, Sandburg. You're a real riot. I'm on the beach with someone that isn't my life partner and I've got a boner." 

"Things could be worse," Blair stated calmly. 

"How?" 

"What if you couldn't get a boner?" 

"Oh man, why not just jinx me? I hate you sometimes," Meyers mumbled. 

"So are you going to try that tonight?" 

"Yeah, I am. We'll see how it goes. If he pisses me off, can I sleep with you and Jim?" 

"Sure," Blair giggled, "now it's your turn again," 

"Shit... Okay, when he's walking around the house naked? He touches himself off and on all night long. Almost like he's teasing himself until I get there. Has Jim ever done this?" 

"All the time." 

"No shit? I figured it was just something Harper did," Meyers was truly surprised. 

"Nope. Jim does it, too. Once while he was on the phone with his dad, he must have forgotten I was even there, he started stroking himself and before long he was leaning over the counter and came all over the counter," Blair had a big smile on his face. 

"Holy shit. That's a good one, Sandburg. Okay, let's see if I can think of another one of Harp that will blow your mind. Okay, I got it. Wait a minute, what did Jim do when he realized you were there?" 

"He got all embarrassed, blushed and said, 'Sorry, Chief.'" Blair was laughing some more. "Now what did you think of?" 

"I came home from work one say and he was fisting himself and talking. So I stood back and listened. He said, 'yeah, just like that Mey. Just like that. Do that again, baby. Make me scream' and then he came all over the sofa." 

"So what was he fantasizing about?" 

"I don't know. I didn't tell him I heard it. I opened the door and pretended I was just coming in." Meyers looked over at Blair for some smart ass answer. 

"Do you fuck him?" Blair asked. 

"Once." 

"Maybe he wants you to fuck him more. Would that bother you?" 

"No, I liked doing it. But he's kind of a take charge kind of guy," Meyers tried to explain. 

"Tough shit. Show him that it's going to be both or none." 

"So, Jim let's you fuck him?" 

"Hell, yes! He loves to be fucked. But so do I. So, it goes both ways for us." Blair beamed. 

"I think I might be burning. Wanna go inside and sit at the bar?" 

"Yeah, good idea. The guys can fend for themselves." Blair picked up the cooler and his towel and they headed back up to the hotel. 

@@@@@

Jim and Harper got out of the ocean and looked around. 

"I know there were here a while ago but they must have gotten too hot and went inside." Jim lifted his surfboard up and carried it over his head. 

Harper did the same thing and they walked up to the hotel. 

When Jim got to the room, he was somewhat disappointed that Blair wasn't there. Jim was waiting for the knock and said, "Sandburg's not here, either." 

"Where do you suppose they went?" Harper asked. 

"No idea. Come on in and have a beer while we wait," Jim offered one to the tall man. 

Jim lay down on the bed and said, "I'm not going to bite. If you want to lie down, there's plenty of room." 

"Thanks," Harper laid down on his stomach, too, as they watched the news. 

"Do you like to receive blow jobs while you're driving?" Jim asked quietly. 

Harper spit his beer all the way to the television screen. "Jesus, you could have warned me." 

"Well?" 

"Yeah, I do. You?" Harper asked. 

"Oh yeah. I just wondered if I was the only one. Do you suppose that Meyers and Sandburg would like to drive now and then and get one, too?" 

"Probably. I never thought about it but I'll offer now," Harper said, smiling. 

"No, it has to be a surprise or it would ruin everything. Don't you think?" Jim looked over at Harp to see if he was embarrassing him. 

"Yeah, I'll surprise him next time," Harper said softly, trying to reposition his cock while lying on it. 

"Do you ever wonder what they really want?" Jim asked. 

"What is with you, Ellison?" 

"I just want to make him happy, that's all," 

"Yeah, I wonder sometimes. I've never tongued him. Have you done that to Sandburg?" 

"Yeah, I do it a lot. He loves it and so do I." Jim waited for Harper to tell him why he hadn't. 

"So it doesn't freak you out to do it?" 

"No, I enjoy it. Blair shaves and is always clean before we do it, so why not?" 

"So I would have to ask him to shave?" 

"No, just shave him yourself and he'll get the picture." Jim smiled. 

"I'm not sure I could do that." 

"Want me to do it for you?" Jim laughed when he saw the look on Harper's face. 

"I'll think about it. I'm a little scared because I don't know what to do," Harper said, blushing. 

"You want me to tell you how? I don't mean do it, but I can tell you about the routine to follow," Jim said. 

"Yeah, that would work," Harper agreed easily. 

"You going to take your pants off or what?" 

"I thought you were just telling me?" Harper was moving farther away from Jim. 

"I'm kidding, Harp. God, you're so easy," Jim proceeded to tell Harp, "Touch Meyers ass and spread his cheeks. Then keep them spread and slip your tongue in the crevice and lick until Mey goes nuts. When he can't stand it any longer, then you kiss that sweet pucker until he begs. Once the begging starts slip your tongue right in and begin fucking him. Then slip your hand up and play with his balls and I promise you that man will come." 

Harper moaned and came in his pants. "Shit... If you tell Mey I did this I'm going to kick your ass." 

"I would never tell him that, but they're right outside the door. You might want to go and change," Jim said, yanking Harp off the bed. 

"Got it. I need to get cleaned off. I'm really sorry, Jim," Harper walked slowly into his room. 

Meyers and Blair walked into the room smiling and said, "You're back?" 

"No, we're not back." Jim pulled Blair into his arms and kissed him hard. 

Blair could feel the nice erection waiting for him. "Where's Harper?" 

"He's in their shower. We were watching television and he wanted to get clean for Mey." Jim figured they would just leave him alone after he said that. 

Blair looked at the blushing man and said, "Jim, can I talk to you for a minute?" 

They both walked out to the patio and Blair said, "Tell me why you're blushing." 

"Chief, he wanted to learn about tongue fucking." 

"So you put your tongue in Harper?" Blair whispered. 

"Of course not. I just told him how to do it and he came in his pants while listening to me." Jim looked at Blair to see how much trouble he was in. 

Oh fuck... Big, big, trouble. 

"So you believe it's nothing that you two were sitting there and he came in his pants?" 

"Chief, I was just telling him how to do it. He wants to try it with Mey and he's afraid. You know Harper, he has that control issue." Jim tried to take Blair into his arms again. 

Blair walked into the room and Meyers said, "Is he mad about us going to the bar without him?" 

"No, he's an inconsiderate asshole and I don't know if I ever want to look at him again." Blair sat on the bed all depressed. 

Harp walked into the room and kissed Meyers. "What did I miss?" 

"I don't know. Why don't you tell me? Sandburg is pissed at Jim and Jim's out on the balcony." Mey stood with his hands on his hips. 

Jim came into the hotel and said, "Sorry, Harp. I seem to have gotten everyone pissed off. I'm really sorry," and he walked out of their room. 

"What's he talking about, Sandburg?" 

"He told me what you two were doing," Blair snarled. 

"We weren't doing anything," Harp growled and walked out of the room looking for Jim. 

He found Jim in the bar and sat next to him in the booth. "Hey, we could discuss more weird things and see if we could piss Sandburg off some more." Harper was laughing. 

"Do you like being fucked?" 

"Only had it done once. I'm not sure," Harp looked at him oddly. "Do you hate it?" 

"No, I love it. But I always wonder if anyone else likes it." 

"He's only tried once and he never asked again, so I figured that he didn't like it." Harper wondered where they were going to end up with this. 

"Maybe he thought you didn't like it," Jim offered. 

"Ya think?" 

"Could be. If I was you I'd ask him to do me again and give it another try." Jim felt like he was helping in his own small way. 

"Harper, it's not that I don't love ya, but sit on the other side." Jim laughed as Harper realized how close he was to Jim. 

"Sorry, Ellison." He smiled at his friend and knew they would be all right. 

"So like you don't feel like an easy lay being the bottom?" 

"Harper, I don't know how to tell you this, but I am a fucking easy lay, so to me that's normal." Jim was laughing hard at the blush on Harper's face. 

"How many inches are you?" Harper asked. 

Jim spit beer through his nose and mouth and started to sputter. "Harp, there are certain things that a person shouldn't tell." 

"You want to know mine?" 

"Yeah," Jim asked leaning closer. 

"I had Meyers measure us one night. I'm 8 1/2 inches long," Harper smiled with glee at the look on Jim's face. 

"Well, it figures. I don't know how long mine is, but it's not that long," Jim said, never lifting his head from the table. 

"Ellison, come here." Harper got up and made his way to the restroom. 

Once there, Jim said, "What?" 

"Whip it out, boy. And I'm whipping mine out and we'll see if it's about the same size." Harper unzipped and pulled his penis out of his jeans. 

Jim did the same and said, "I can tell you it's not that long," 

Harp compared the two penises and said, "You're the same size as Meyers, so you're 7 inches. That's a respectable cock, Ellison." 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah, want to go back to drinking beer, or you just want me to hold your dick all night?" Harper laughed as Jim shoved him away and both men put their cocks in for the night. 

"Well, now I at least know if I have to like give that on a test or something," Jim giggled as the beer was getting to him. 

"So how big is Sandburg?" 

Jim spit his beer out again. "Warn a guy, will ya? If I'm 7 than he's 8." 

"Hey, Ellison, have you ever given Sandburg a hand job while sitting in the movie theater?" 

"No, don't think I have. He's weird, he likes movies, I don't think he would want me playing with my toy." Jim smiled across the table and wondered what normal people did in real life. 

Back in the room, Blair and Meyers were lying on the bed watching Buffy, The Vampire Slayer. 

"What do you want to do tomorrow, Sandburg?" 

"How about Channel Islands National Park? The islands are accessible only by boat but the park visitor's center is located on the mainland shore in Ventura. I figured we could spend an entire day there if you wanted to." Sandburg was thrilled. 

"Sounds good to me and we'll get rid of the lugs all day long with surfing. Speaking of those lugs, where are they?" 

"Who cares? I'm having a really good time, Mey. Thanks for asking us." Blair patted him on the back. 

"Blair, have you ever thought of doing something odd with Jim?" 

"You just called me Blair. What's up?" 

"Well, I'm afraid I might end up calling you Sandy instead of Sandburg, so I figured Blair was better." Both men laughed. 

"Yeah, sure, I think about new and weird things all the time. I'm trying to talk him into golden showers but I think it's a lost cause. I don't mean I want him to piss in my mouth. Yuck. No, I want him to piss on me in the shower." Blair blushed as he was telling Mey his secret. 

"Well, my secret is I want Harper to tongue fuck me. I've hinted around numerous times but he doesn't pick it up. So, I figured he's not interested." 

"Try again tonight. I have a feeling you'll be surprised." Blair smiled over at his friend. 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah..." 

"When Jim fucks you does he make noise?" 

"Whoa. We might want to save some of this for later." Blair dumped the rest of his beer down the drain. "I need to find Jim." 

"I'll go with ya," Meyers walked along side him until they got to the bar and saw the two guys arm wrestling on the table. 

"They're so mature," Blair said as they walked into the room. 

Jim heard Blair's heartbeat and looked up and that's all it took for Harp to get his arm down. 

"I won," Harper stood up and yelled. 

"You did not. I was looking at Sandburg and Meyers. Tell me that you could honestly keep your mind on arm wrestling when they walk into a room. You're both gorgeous guys." Jim leaned into Blair and almost knocked the smaller man over. 

"Blair, if you don't want him tonight, I'll take him." Meyers started laughing. 

When they got the men upstairs, they realized it was going to be a long fucking night. Both of the older men fell asleep right away. 

Blair was lying in the bed, watching television really quietly. The door opened and Blair could see Meyers standing there. 

"Harp wants to tongue fuck me and I'm freaking out." 

"Come here," Blair took him into the bathroom and told him how to shave and clean himself. When Meyers walked back into his room, Blair figured that he wouldn't see him again all night long. 

Jim woke up and saw Blair sleeping. The light from the television let Jim see how gorgeous his man was. He pulled Blair's sweats off and then his boxers. He got between his legs and began to suck on his cock. Blair woke up right away and was on the verge of coming that quickly, too. Jim moved up and kissed Blair until they both needed more air. 

"What would you like, babe?" Jim asked. 

"Everything." 

"You got it, babe." Jim began playing Blair's body as if he was a violin. They tried to be quiet, but they didn't succeed. Jim was yelling, Blair was yelling and the neighbors were pounding on the wall to shut up. 

Once they showered they crawled into bed. "So what was the deal with the arm wrestling at the bar?" 

"I had to prove myself. His dick is bigger than mine." 

"What?" 

"His dick is bigger than mine. I couldn't let him think I was weak because of it." 

"Jim, your dick's smaller than mine but you don't arm wrestle with me." Blair was in shock. 

"But you love me, Blair." 

"So does Harper, you moron," Blair smacked him upside the head as he said it. 

"Oh yeah. Well, at any rate, I found out how big I am." 

"Jim, I don't even want to know when or how you figured this out." Blair put his head into Jim's chest and rested his tired mind. 

"Do you wanna know how big Meyers is?" 

"No, go to sleep," Blair smacked Jim on the chest just to show him who was in charge. 

"Night, Chief," Jim said sweetly. 

"Night, Jim." 

They were both just about asleep when they heard Harper scream. Jim came up off the bed with lightening speed and didn't stop until he was in their room. Blair tried to catch him but he was too slow. 

Oh, there was tongue fucking going on all right, but not Meyers. He was doing it to Harper. "Sorry, guys, I thought someone was attacking you," Jim said and closed the door. 

"I could have gone my whole life without seeing that," Jim whined to Blair. 

"They're in love. It's supposed to be sexy." 

"It's only sexy if it's you, babe. Only you," Jim pulled him in for the night. 

@@@@@

Jim woke to an empty bed. He heard Blair shaving in the bathroom and hoped he wasn't too late for a morning fuck. He always surfed better after a good fuck. He walked into the bathroom and Blair said, "I was waiting for you. I know you like to fuck me before sporting events." 

"Are you making fun of me?" he asked, laughing. 

"I have plans so if you want your fucking you better do it now," Blair teased him as he pushed him into the shower. 

Jim loosened him up and began to fuck him quickly and hard. There was a knock on the door and Jim said, "Not now." 

"Sandburg, what time are we going?" Meyers asked. 

"In about 20 minutes. Okay. Now let Jim finish fucking me and I'll be out." Blair laughed at the look on Jim's face. 

"You fucking brat. I'll show you fuck. I'm going to fuck you hard. I'm going to fuck you good. I'm going to fuck you so much you won't be able to sit down again. I love fucking your ass. God, I love your ass taking my cock. It's a partnership. My cock fucks your ass and your ass takes my cock. We're perfect for each other. God, you feel so fucking good. Can you feel everything, babe? Fuck me back. Fuck me, Blair." Jim was so close but he also knew that Blair was right there. They both came at the same time and both of them yelled out their names. 

Jim cleaned Blair all off inside and out. "Thank you, Baby. That was great. I'm going to surf well today." 

"Thanks to you, too. I have to go now. Be careful and I'll see you tonight." Blair kissed him and went running out of the bathroom with just boxers on. 

When Jim came out Meyers and Sandburg were gone. Harper was sitting on their bed, watching tv. "Having fun, Harp?" 

"No. I can't get my damn suit on. It takes two and Meyers is gone." 

"Well, we'll help each other because I can't get mine on alone, either," Jim said as he got his suit out of the closet. 

They helped each other get ready and made their way down to the beach with everything they needed. This time they even took towels for afterwards. "Let's take a bag with swim trunks on if we want to stay down there and catch some rays," Jim suggested. 

"Okay, I'll get mine." 

They had towels, a bag, sunscreen and their boards and wax for surfing. 

While they were surfing they didn't even see each other, but once they were tired, Jim found Harp and asked him if he wanted to go to where their towels were. 

They walked by a man who was standing with two other guys and he just started taking his wet suit off on the beach. No one seemed to even notice. 

"I guess we don't have to go change. We can do it right here," Harper said as he got out of the darn thing. 

Jim followed suit and put his trunks on. He then lay down on the towel and absorbed some rays. 

Jim could hear two women talking and what they were discussing was distressing to him. Harper knew about his senses, so it wasn't like he had to hide them. 

"Harper, there are two women down there discussing how many times they've had to fake orgasm's. Now they're discussing how many times they just did it because the husband wanted to." 

"I say you listen to someone that's talking about something good." 

"Do you think Meyers and Sandburg ever just do it because?" 

"I hope not. What do you think?" Harper was worried now. 

"Well, I agree. I hope not. But I'm going to try and notice more. Maybe I push myself on him sometimes." Jim looked sad and guilty at the same time. 

"Nah, he doesn't strike me as the type that would let you push him around at all." 

"Yeah?" Jim looked hopeful. 

"Duh..." Harper said, smiling. 

"Oh shit... Now they're discussing how fucking worthless their husbands are about planning a family." 

"Jim, I think we're safe on that one." 

"Hasn't Meyers ever asked you if the two of you could have a child?" 

"Yeah, but you know I never got pregnant." 

"I'm serious," Jim snarled. 

"So am I. We tried and tried and tried. Nothing worked. I think I'm barren." This time even Jim laughed. 

"Adoption?" Jim asked. 

"Two cops? I don't think so. We're hoping you give sperm to Connor so we can all spoil that one," Harper said, looking away. 

"Harp, been with many women?" 

"Yeah, a fair share. I prefer men," he answered. 

"So who was your type? I bet I can guess. Tall, blond and sexy as hell." Jim laughed into the towel. 

"As a matter of fact, the one woman I got serious with was only 5' 6" tall. Beautiful with brown hair and brown eyes." 

"That's interesting," Jim answered. 

"So who was your type?" 

"I didn't have a type. I love women. I still do love to look at them but I wouldn't leave Blair for them." 

"Well, that's good to hear," Harper said almost irritated. 

"How about another guy? Ever look?" 

"This is just between you and me?" Harper asked in a whisper. 

"Yeah, just between you and me. Spill." Jim waited to hear what his friend had to say. 

"I went out a couple of times with Vince Barretti in Vice. Do you know him?" 

Jim laid there in shock. "You mean you dated him before Meyers?" 

"No, I dated him while I was seeing Meyers. I came to my senses and that was that." 

"He's an asshole and I can't believe you fucked around on Meyers." Jim got up and picked his board and towel and headed to the hotel. 

"I knew this talking shit wasn't for me. I'm sorry, Jim," Harper said as he tried to catch up. 

"What are you saying sorry to me for? You didn't fuck me." Jim stormed into his room and Harper followed. 

"I didn't fuck Vince. I felt like I needed something new," Harper was trying to explain it to Jim. 

"Oh so that's much better, you let Vince fuck you? That's great," Jim pulled away from him as he was trying to talk. 

"Jim, he didn't fuck me, either. I just went on two dates. He called me a cock tease and still does to this day. I wouldn't fuck anyone besides Meyers. Really! I wouldn't. And why are you getting so upset about it?" 

"Because he's one of the sweetest, kindest guys I know. I can't stand the idea of you hurting him," Jim was still ranting. 

"Well, I'm going to go take a nap until they get back. Talk to you later." Harper walked into his room and lay down on the bed. 

Jim did the same in their room and wondered how women did this talking shit all the time. Jim was exhausted. 

@@@@@

Meyers and Sandburg were having a blast in the boat they were assigned to. It had turned out to be a lovely day for the boat ride. They were alone for the trip back, so they decided they would talk some more. 

"Guess what?" Meyers asked Blair. 

"What?" 

"Harper tongue fucked me for the first time last night and then he asked me to do him. Do you believe it?" Mey was beaming. 

"I know I love it," Blair said smiling. 

"Ever thought about being with anyone else, Blair?" 

"No. Jim would be able to smell them and he'd probably do something stupid like kill him." Both men laughed, knowing that it was true. 

"But do you ever look? Not act on it, but just look?" 

"All right, what's going on?" Blair asked. 

"I think Harp has a thing for a cop in Vice." He had his head hanging down but Blair could see his lip trembling. 

"Bullshit! I'll never believe that. He adores you," Blair said. 

"I saw him with him," Meyers said, quiet as a mouse. 

"What? When? Who?" 

Three weeks ago, at lunch one day, and it's Vince Berritti," 

"Mey, he was probably discussing a case with him. We are cops, right?" 

"Yeah, that would work, except he reached across the table and kissed Harp and Harp didn't shove him away." Meyers was getting sadder and sadder. 

"Well, what did he say when you asked him about it?" Blair asked. 

"I haven't told him I saw him. He's under a lot of pressure right now. I didn't want it to be worse." 

"Well, you're going to talk to him about it tonight. Right?" 

"I guess so. But Blair, our lovemaking was so great last night and this morning. I feel like I might be doing things right now." Meyers tried to smile. 

"First of all, you discuss things if you aren't happy sexually. But you don't blame that other person. Mey, you're a great guy and he's going to be lost without you. He needs to know what he wants in his life," Blair lectured. 

"Have you ever been with a woman?" 

"Yes, a lot of women. Why?" Blair asked. 

"Well, maybe I should try women. Harp has been with women. He loves women." Meyers was getting more depressed as they spoke. 

"Harper will come around and if he doesn't, I'll kick his ass." Blair put his arm around Meyers's shoulders and held him for a while. 

When they got back to the hotel, Meyers asked, "Blair, please don't say anything to Harp. Okay?" 

"Okay. You got it." Blair walked to his door and put his key in. 

Jim was sleeping so he just sat in a chair and watched the day go by. He was so depressed. Meyers was one of the nicest guys they knew and he gets shit on? I don't think so. 

Blair walked over to the door and knocked quietly. Jim woke up when he saw Blair standing there. He could hear his lover's heartbeat going a little too fast and wondered what was going on. Harper opened the door and said, "Hey, Sandburg." 

"Hey. Want to go for dinner and dancing tonight?" 

"Just you and me?" Harper said laughing. 

"No, you idiot, all four of us. Do you want to or not?" 

"What crawled up your butt, Sandburg?" Harper looked in and said, "Ellison, you awake in there?" 

"Well, I am now. You two want to take this outside?" Jim got up and walked out on the balcony. Blair just looked at him strangely and said, "I'd like you and Meyers both to go with us for dinner and dancing tonight." 

"Fine. What time?" Harper knew that Jim had most likely told Sandburg about him. 

"Seven. We'll come for you." Blair shut the door right on Harp's face. 

Blair walked out to the balcony and said, "I know someone in here that could use some loving." 

Jim had him in bed in record time. Jim hadn't been this wild in ages. "What brought this on? Not that I'm complaining, man." Blair kissed him more. 

"Harp and I were talking about maybe not fulfilling our lovers sex lives as we should." Jim started kissing his way down to Blair's belly. 

"Jim, I have no complaints at all. I love the way you love me." 

"Good! Now let me love you more." Jim went to work making his guide go crazy with need. Blair was crying out for release in record time. 

Jim stopped and said, "I want you to come with me in you. We'll come together." 

"Sounds good to me. Now get busy," Blair loved to boss his big studly Sentinel. 

When they finally came, they howled together and Harper said to Meyers, "Man, those two are loud, aren't they?" 

"I think it's sweet," Mey told him. 

Harper just looked oddly at Meyers and walked into the bathroom to get ready for dinner. 

While Jim and Blair were in the shower, Blair asked Jim, "While we're at the restaurant, will you ask Meyers to dance?" 

"Chief, I don't like to dance with anyone but you. You know that." Jim kissed him, hoping that would get his mind off of it. No such luck. 

"Jim, how many things do I ask you to do for me? None. You always ask me to do things. I'm asking one favor. Will you do it or not?" 

"Yes, you know I'll do anything for you." Jim got out and started getting dressed. 

When they all arrived at the restaurant Jim could tell something was going on that he didn't know about. "Hey, Ellison, could I talk to you for a moment?" 

Harper led the way outside and the two of them were talking, then it looked like they were arguing. 

"What's going on with them? Please tell me you didn't tell Jim about Harp?" 

"No, I didn't say a word. He's been in a mood all afternoon long. Maybe they had words after they finished surfing today." Blair thought maybe his lover was keeping some things from him. 

When Harper and Jim walked back in, they sat down and neither looked happy. 

"Sandburg, did Jim tell you what I said to him today?" Harper asked. 

"I told you that I never said a word. Fuck you!" Jim got up and walked out of the restaurant. 

"What's going on?" Blair asked. 

"I told him something in confidence today and I thought he told Mey." 

"Jim is one of the most trustworthy people in the world. Now go find him and apologize to him." Blair bossed Harper just as well as he did Jim. 

Harper got up and went looking for his friend. He walked around the corner and saw Jim standing against a wall. "Hey." 

"Hey, yourself." Jim didn't look up, just kept his eyes on the ground. 

"Jim, I'm really sorry. Something's wrong with Mey and I was taking it out on you. Please don't be mad." Harper really did sound pitiful when he begged. 

Jim smiled at him and said, "Grow up, Harp. Ask him what's wrong and fix it." 

"Do you know why Sandburg is so pissed off at me?" 

"He was with Meyers. I would guess they were talking and Meyers told him something you said?" Jim guessed. 

"I guess. Well, I'll talk to Mey tonight." Harper slung his arm across Jim's shoulders and they walked back into the restaurants. 

"Here they come. Put on a happy face, Sandburg. Promise me you'll be nice to him?" 

"Fine." Blair just looked over and smiled at both men. 

They ordered dinner and ate, talking about the surfing of the day. Then Meyers and Sandburg talked about the boat ride and the evening flew by. 

After dinner they went into the bar area and Jim said, "Hey, Meyers, wanna dance?" 

Meyers looked at him in surprise and answered, "Sure." 

It was a slow dance and Jim held him really close and said, "So how are things going?" 

"Oh shit, Sandburg told you, didn't he?" Meyers tried to pull away but Jim wouldn't let him. Which was funny because Meyers was bigger than Jim. 

"Sandburg didn't tell me anything. I thought you might like to dance but now you have my attention. What's happening?" 

"It's not important," Mey said sadly. 

"Oh shit! You know about Vince, don't you?" 

"Who told you?" Mey asked, looking even sadder. 

"Harp told me. He felt terrible. If it helps, he didn't sleep with him. Never even wanted to." Jim was trying to help. 

"Nah, it doesn't really help, Jim. I think I'm going to leave him. Don't make a big deal out of it. I've never made him happy. He deserves to be happy." Jim was certain that this was the saddest person on the face of the earth. 

"Give it a while once we get home, okay?" 

"No, I'm going to fly home tomorrow. You guys stay and have fun. Thanks for everything, Jim." Meyers got out of his arms and walked right past the table and out the door. 

"Harp, if you ever want to see that man again, get your ass up and go after him. You do whatever it takes to make it work. He fucking knows about Vince." Jim shoved Harper out of the booth. 

"Well, how could he know? Sandburg, you told him?" 

"Does it matter? He knows and I think he's leaving," Blair said quietly. 

"Sandburg, we're in California. It's not like he's going to just move out of the loft, he's in another city." Harper was getting worked up and they all knew it. 

"Harper, do you love him?" Blair asked. 

"Of course I love him." 

"Then get over there and put a stop to it." Blair stood up and walked to the doorway. Jim was right behind him as they saw Harper just sitting in the booth. 

Jim turned to go to him and Blair said, "Go on. I'll handle this." 

Blair sat down across from Harper and said, "So you're going to let him go?" 

"I don't know what to with him. He takes too much out of me." Harper sat there waiting for Sandburg to slug him or something. 

"Harp, we've been through a lot, right?" 

"Right." 

"So, are you going to dump me as a friend?" Blair looked at the sad man in front of him and wanted to hug him but knew he couldn't. He had to be tough. 

"No, you're not hard. You do most of the work." 

"Jim?" Blair asked almost afraid of what he would hear. 

"Jim does most of the work, too. I'm a lazy friend and lover. I'm not proud of it but I am," Harper started to get up. 

"Wait... What are you going to do?" 

"I'm going to go take him to the airport." Harper started to walk out to the parking lot. 

"I can't believe that you're going to let him go, just like that. He was right. You don't fucking love him. He knew he wasn't man enough for you. I told him he was wrong. I'm a big fucking liar." Blair started running all the way to the hotel. 

Meyers had all of his stuff in the suitcase and asked Jim to take him to the airport. "You can't leave without saying goodbye to Blair." 

"Jim, you know that Harp will try and talk me out of it. I just want to go home." Mey stood there looking lost. 

Jim heard Harper outside the door and said, "Meyers, I don't know how to tell you this but you'll be better off without him. He doesn't deserve you. I've got a lot of friends that would love to meet you," Jim said sweetly. 

"Jim, I don't want to meet anyone else. I wanted Harper. God, I'm fucked no matter what." Meyers sat on the bed holding his head in his hands. 

"Mey?" Harper walked in the door and Jim walked over to their room. 

"I wanted a ride to the airport and he won't drive me." 

"I'll drive you. Do you have everything?" Harper grabbed his luggage and walked towards the door. 

Meyers grabbed a pillow and put it over his face and was sobbing. Harper sat next to him and said, "Come here and let me hold you." 

Harper shut the light off and just held Mey close to him. "Mey, I love you so much. That guy was paying attention to me and I was afraid that I was going to never have a chance with anyone else. Then I realized I didn't want a chance with anyone else. If you want to leave me, that's all right, but don't leave because you think I fucked someone or that I don't love you. I love you more than you'll ever know." 

"So what's going on?" Blair asked Jim in a whisper. 

"He's making love to him. Showing him how much he means to him," Jim said with a smile on his face. "Oh man, now he's asking Mey to fuck him. He wants Mey to show him who owns him." 

"I love these Sentinel senses sometimes," Blair said, getting cozy with his man. 

"I want you to own me," Jim said, laughing. 

"I could do that," and Blair did just that. 

@@@@@

In the morning, Jim and Blair went down for breakfast and decided to go whale watching. Harper and Meyers walked in and Harper asked, "Can we join you?" 

Blair looked up and him and saw a very sad man. "Of course." 

They sat down and ordered some breakfast and Jim watched them. Meyers was still very upset and Harp was trying but he just didn't know what to do. Some men were like that. _Takes one to know one, Ellison._

"You guys going to watch the whales today?" Meyers asked. 

"We were thinking about it. Want to go along?" Jim asked. 

"I've always wanted to see them." 

"Well, then this is your chance," Jim said with a smile in his voice. 

When Harper got back to the table Meyers said, "Hey, Harp, want to go and watch the whales today?" 

"Maybe later. It's best to catch those waves early." Jim kicked him under the table and he kept from yelling out and saw the dirty look on Ellison's face. "Oh, hell! I can surf anytime. Let's go watch whales." 

"You mean it?" Meyers' face lit up. 

"Yeah, I meant it." Harp leaned in for a much needed kiss. 

Later on that day Harp said, "Ellison, remind me to thank you for the kick in the shin." 

"Hey, you were going to fuck up what you tried to fix. Are you saying you don't really want to fix it?" 

"No, I want to fix it but fuck! We never get to go surfing in Cascade." 

"Grow up, Harp. He's your lover. Which is more important?" Jim walked away not waiting for an answer. 

"Oh no. Looks like Jim and Harp are having words again," Meyers said looking upset all over again. 

"Can I say something to you?" Blair asked, as if Meyers actually had a choice in the matter. 

"Sure." 

"First of all, I love you to death. Secondly, so does Jim. Now, that being said, you're too damn nice. You need to teach Harp who belongs to whom. Yell sometimes. It doesn't hurt. In fact... it helps. I love to yell at Jim whenever I can." 

Meyers started to laugh and said, "I'll try. You want me to toughen up?" 

"Exactly. That will do the trick. You're not a small dude. You could punch him out, if need be." Blair was laughing by this time. 

"What do you say we let the boys go surfing tomorrow and you and I can check out the Open Market." 

"Sounds great to me." Blair was happiest when he could people watch. 

That night at dinner, Meyers said, "Harp, Sandburg and I are going to the Open Market tomorrow, so you and Jim want to go and surf?" 

"Oh man, that would be great. Thanks, babe." Harper kissed him without even thinking about where they were. 

"Let's get up earlier this time and get out there first thing." Jim was planning as usual. 

"What time do you want to get up?" 

"How about four?" Jim asked. 

"Four, it is. I'll be ready by 4:30, at the latest." Harper was thrilled. 

Jim and Blair were lying in bed that night and Blair said, "Want me to turn the television down?" 

"No need. I have my hearing down almost to normal." 

"Why?" 

"Because it's embarrassing to know that much about your friend's sex life," Jim laughed as he pulled Blair closer. 

"But wait, Jim, maybe they were doing something you could have done to me," Blair teased. 

"I'll do something to you..." and he did just that. 

@@@@@

The next morning Blair woke to an empty bed and wasn't happy about it. He hated when Jim got up before him. Once he showered and dressed he knocked on Meyers door. Meyers answered and looked happy as all get out. 

"Whoa, is this Bill Meyers room? He's my friend but he hasn't been smiling like this in a long time." Blair was having a good time teasing with him. 

"Ready to go, hot shot?" 

"Can we eat first?" Blair almost begged. 

As soon as they ate and got in the car for the drive over, Blair asked, "Okay, I'm dying to know. What happened?" 

"First of all, I fucked him twice last night. I kid you not, I fucked him long and hard. And you want to know the weird part? He loved it. Honest to goodness, he loved it." Meyers was just glowing like a flashlight. 

"I guess so. Twice? Oh man, I have to try that with Jim. I wonder if he would let me?" 

"Don't ask, just do it," Meyers laughed at Blair's look. 

"We've created a monster." 

Then before he left this morning, I asked him to tongue fuck me, and he did. While he was doing that, he had to fist himself because it made him so hot. Jesus, I was so happy to have him so interested. It was wonderful." Meyers took Blair's hand and just squeezed it. 

"Hey, Mey, you deserve being treated well. Just don't wait for him to do it. Take charge," Blair said sweetly. 

"I do believe that Jim probably has his hands full with you." Meyers almost ran off the road when Blair smacked his arm. "Speaking of that, what did you boys do last night? Fair is fair. I told you my fun, you tell me yours." 

"Well, since you asked so nicely. Jim gives the best fucking blowjobs and he gave me two last night. Then he finished that up with fucking me real sweet and gentle. I love when he does that." Blair wasn't going to tell him exactly what Jim did while he did those blowjobs. Some things were best left unsaid. 

When they arrived at the market, they both got out and started looking at things as they walked. It was a huge open market and it had not only things, but food. 

"Mey, look at that couple ahead of us. Who do you think is the one in charge?" 

"That's easy. The woman. She's in total control, you can tell." 

"I wonder if they wonder about us?" Blair said. 

"Me and you?" 

"No, gay men." 

"Well, hell, yeah! I have women ask me all the time what turns me on and so forth. I don't tell them but still they ask," Mey picked something up and was looking it over as Blair got closer. 

Whispering, "So, what does turn you on?" 

Meyers paid for the statue, waited for it to be boxed and then they continued on. "I would have said different things last month. But now, I have a whole new list. So what turns you on, Sandburg?" 

"Jim watching me from across the room. Man, I can come in my jeans from that alone. And then, of course, all of the things that we've talked about this whole vacation." Blair stopped and bought Jim a necklace with a wolf on it. 

This really strange woman walked up to Blair and Mey and asked, "Are you guys gay?" 

"We're pretty fucking happy. Why do you ask?" Meyers said very sarcastically. 

"No, I didn't mean happy, I meant gay as in a homosexual," the woman said. 

Both Blair and Mey put up their fingers like a cross and hissed. "Damn homosexuals seep in everywhere. 

"Oh good, I'm so glad you're not. It would make me uncomfortable." 

"Lady, relax. We'll keep all the homo's out, okay?" Blair asked. 

"Thank you, young man. And might I say you're very handsome?" 

"You might. But I would have to clear it with the homo here." Blair reached over and pulled Mey down for a kiss. 

"Oh gross, I knew it. You are stupid fags." 

"We're not stupid." Blair and Mey said together and laughed as they walked off. 

By the time the boys were done shopping they had four big bags and most of it was for their lovers. On the way home Blair asked, "So, everything is forgiven with Harp?" 

"Yeah, more or less. He's sorry. I'm sorry. We didn't work very hard at it and it was both of our faults," Mey said calmly. 

"So you feel good about it?" 

"Yeah, Blair, I do. Thanks for asking though." 

@@@@@

Jim stripped and got in the shower. He was in the middle of shampooing his hair when Blair walked in and pulled him down for a kiss. "Hey, Chief, how was your day?" 

"I had a great day and I even got to make out with Mey in the middle of the market." 

Jim laughed and asked "Do tell?" 

So, Blair told him all about the woman and Jim roared. "Hurry up, man, I bought you presents." 

"Oh goody, I get presents. Can I have one while I'm in here?" Jim asked laughing again. 

"Sure, let me pick one out," Blair said seriously. 

"I was talking about you, Chief." 

"I know you were. Man, you're too easy," Blair slid his clothes off and joined Jim in the shower. He gave Jim one of the best blowjobs he'd ever given him. Then Jim gave him one. He rested against Blair's belly and asked, "So now can we do presents?" 

@@@@@

The next three days flew by. Jim and Harp surfed every chance they could and Blair and Meyers went to see every Museum and Wildlife Park there was. They were all depressed about leaving but also knew that this was the best summer vacation that anyone could have. 

On the plane home, Harper had his arm around Mey. The younger man looked up and asked, "You're angry with me, aren't you?" 

"No. I'm not angry with you. I'm angry with me but never you." He just pulled him closer. 

"Do I ever get to be a top again?" 

"How about tonight?" Harp asked quietly. 

"I think I could pencil you in for tonight," Mey was smiling like crazy. 

"Wait a minute, does this mean you're never gonna let me do you?" Harp asked, trying not to laugh. 

"I could pencil that in also." Mey leaned in for the kiss that Harp was on his way to giving. 

A stewardess was walking by and saw them kiss. Jim watched her face and saw the repulsion. He poked Sandburg to watch and Jim said, "Stupid fags." 

The stewardess smiled at Jim as if he was her friend and ally. 

Harp looked over at Jim and said, "Hey! We're not stupid." 

Then all four men broke out in laughter and the girl knew she was alone in this. 

@@@@@

When they finally got home, it was bittersweet. Good to be there, but sad to leave California. As they walked up Blair said to Mey, "Now everything we talked about is just between us, right?" 

"You know it. In fact, your secrets are safe with me." Mey smiled at him and Blair knew they really were. 

"Thanks again for the wonderful trip," Blair said as he walked to his loft. 

"Yeah, Mey, thanks a lot. It was a blast," Jim followed Blair upstairs and couldn't wait to get back to his old bed. His old body needed his old bed. 

The end.


	4. On The Road Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blair has to travel to Seattle to claim an inheritance; Jim, Harper and Meyers join him on the journey. A lot of arguing and bad language.

Summary: Blair has to travel to Seattle to claim an inheritance; Jim, Harper and Meyers join him on the journey.

On The Road Again   
Patt

~~~~~ 

 

Blair was nervous as he walked to the lawyer's office that morning. When he got there, he walked in and announced himself and sat down. 

A pretty woman called from the hallway, "Mr. Sandburg?" 

"That's me." Blair followed her into the huge office. 

"Mr. Taylor will be in shortly. I'm Sarah and if you need anything just give a yell." 

"Thanks, Sarah." Blair spoke as he sat down and waited for Mr. Taylor. 

A man, similar in size to Blair, walked into the office and smiled, "Mr. Sandburg?" 

"Mr. Taylor?" Blair asked in reply. 

"Sit and I'll fill you in on this." 

Blair sat down and waited for the explanation. 

"First of all, you had an Uncle Thomas that lived in Seattle. He didn't have anything to do with the family, but he watched your life in the last few years. He decided that he wanted to leave his things to you. There is a motor home that is brand new. Next is a new Mercedes and a home in Seattle. Part of the stipulation is you leave the Mercedes here and you drive the motor home to Seattle to sign all of the paperwork. You have to take it on a two week trip before you make any decisions. Then you decide to sell it or keep it for trips. It's totally up to you. And I almost forgot to mention the part about the money." 

"I don't even know this man. Why would he give me everything?" Blair was troubled about the entire thing. "How much money?" 

"Your portion would be close to a million. You've got a lot to think about in the next few days." Mr. Taylor stood up to shake Blair's hand. 

Standing, Blair shook it and then walked out the door. As he was almost to the elevator, Mr. Taylor walked up and said, "You need to sign the paperwork. You forgot your keys for the motor home and the directions to the house in Seattle." He handed them to Blair and walked off, with the signed papers in hand. 

Blair figured there would be no more than one motor home in the parking lot and he was right. It was huge and beautiful. Jim was going to love it. Blair laughed all the way to the vehicle. It was green, brown and black camo. It just looked like Jim. Smooth, sleek, strong and fucking huge. 

Blair opened it up and walked inside and couldn't believe how nice it was. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Looking around the area, he was surprised at how large a motor home could be. There was a bedroom in the back, with a bed over the cab. It was still large enough for adults to sleep. 

_I'm going to ask Meyers and Harper along. They need a break. They've been at each other's throats. It'll be good for them. We'll even let them have the bedroom on account of Harp being so friggin' tall._

Driving home Blair felt like he owned the road. That was until he almost ran into Jim. Fuck... We all need to get our licenses, too. Except for me. I have mine. Then he realized they might not need a special license for this vehicle. 

When he got to the loft he got out and couldn't figure out why Jim wasn't down there throwing a fit. He walked upstairs and opened the door to find his lover looking good and pissed off. 

"Chief, some idiot just tried to run me off the road. Honest to god, I had to come home because I thought I was going to fucking die." Jim was pacing as he ranted. 

"It was me, Jim." 

"Shut up, I'm serious." 

"So am I. Sit down and I'll tell you about my day." Blair sat down only to be ignored by Jim. 

Jim looked down to the parking lot and saw the motor home and looked at Blair in shock. "You fucking tried to kill me, Chief." 

"Not on purpose. I'm sorry." Blair was trying not to laugh, because he knew that would get them nowhere. 

"Chief, that's a 43 foot 2000 London Aire 450hp Cummins w/Slide. Those damn things cost about $180,000.00. What's going on?" 

"Two hundred thou to be exact. Well, sit down and shut up and I'll tell you. It's very interesting." Blair filled him in on the visit to the lawyer and everything that was said that day. 

"Holy shit..." Jim said softly as his defenses went up. 

"Knock it off, Ellison. I'm not dumping you until I get all of the paperwork signed for the money. And if you're a real good boy, I might even keep you around after that." Blair smiled over at Jim. 

"Are you going to keep being a cop when we get home?" Jim asked nervously. 

"Duh!" 

"So when are you going on this trip, because I think I should teach you how to drive one of these things?" Jim offered. 

"You are going to drive, hot shot." Blair smiled again. 

“There is a God.”

"I've got to ask for time off for both of us, but how about Mey and Harp joining us?" Blair asked. 

"Nothing against them, but I don't want to be stuck inside of a motor home for two weeks with them." Jim stated calmly. 

"I'm asking them anyhow. It's my trip. I'm going to ask them. If you don't want to go, you can stay here." Blair stormed off to the office and began making his calls. 

@@@@@

Before long Harp and Mey were at the front door. "God, I can't believe we're going on a vacation with you boys again." Harp said, giving a high five to Blair as he walked into the room. 

"Sure you don't mind, Jim?" Mey asked. 

"I'm thinking I need to catch up on some things here. You all have a good time. Take good care of Sandburg for me." Jim walked up the stairs and looked very unhappy. 

"I think we should see what Jim thinks about us going along." Harper was trying to help. 

Mey stood up and said good and loud, "Tough shit if he doesn't like it. We're going and we're leaving in the morning. Thank you for asking us, Burgy." 

Both men started giggling at the nickname, and both hated it. 

Harp walked upstairs and sat on the bed for a moment. "Jim, do you want us to stay here? We can. We will." 

"Nah, I'm just being moody. He's going to have a lot of money and I'm afraid that he'll dump me." Jim looked over at Harp. 

"Hey guys, we all need to go and get our CDL license tomorrow. Sandburg's the only one that has one." Meyers mentioned. 

Harper called down from the bedroom, "Sounds good to us. We're in." 

"I already have one. I had to get one for the last undercover assignment I was on." Jim said. 

"All right, so only Meyers and Harper need one and we're on the road again." Blair said as he giggled and sang. "Does this mean that my better half is going to join us?" 

"Yeah, I just had to think." Jim kissed Blair once he got downstairs. 

"I keep telling you that thinking can be dangerous." Blair swatted Jim's ass and took off running. 

@@@@@

When they got ready to leave, the guys all gave the huge Motor home a run through so they could figure out who would be sleeping where. 

"No way am I sleeping in that cab over compartment. I'm too tall. I'm too fucking tall even for the bedroom." Harp was complaining about being tall as usual. 

"Jim and I will take the cab over sleep compartment and you and Meyers can have the bedroom." Blair delegated. 

"Excuse me? Did it occur to you to ask me about it?" Jim whined. 

"Yes, and I knew you would whine so I didn't. So there." Blair shut him up quickly. 

"Driving schedule?" Meyers asked. 

"As a matter of fact I do have one done up. Everyone is going to drive a certain number of hours. That way no one gets too tired. We're going a long way out of our way, so we can stretch this into two weeks. We could be there in four hours. But then the lawyer wouldn't be happy." 

"That makes sense to me." Meyers replied. 

"It would." Jim said. 

"Fuck you, Ellison." Meyers said before they even started the trip. 

"So who is in charge of emptying that sewer line?" Harper asked, very seriously. 

"Well I can't. I couldn't get that close to it and Sandburg knows it." Jim said smiling. 

"Jim, we're going to take turns and you can turn it down when you have to empty it. Get a grip." Blair couldn't believe how immature men could be sometimes. Himself included. 

Jim growled, "Could we at least start this trip before the fighting starts?" 

"I agree with Jim." Harp stood next to him, kind of bending over. 

Jim looked up at him and said, "Oh this is going to be a comfy trip for a person that is 6' 8" tall." 

"He'll make the best of it, won't you, Harp?" Mey glared at Harp and the tall man knew he better answer correctly. 

"It'll be great, Ellison. Not to worry." He looked over at Mey and saw he answered right. Mey was smiling at him with that look. The one that Harp loved so much. 

"We're off. Can you believe it? It only took seven hours to get things organized." Blair snickered. 

"Hey, it wasn't just me, Mey is anal too." Jim shouted up to his driving lover. 

"Don't be talking about that stuff when I'm in the room." Harp laughed at Jim's stricken look on his face. 

Blair and Mey were sitting up front and started singing On The Road Again and sadly, Harp and Jim found out that they knew all of the words. The two young guys were having a blast already. So Jim and Harp tried to loosen up. 

A rap song came on the radio and the two men started in and Jim covered his ears. 

"You hate rap, too?" Harp whispered. 

"Why are you whispering? And yes, I hate rap." Jim whispered back. 

"Why are you whispering?" 

"Blair, I really hate rap. Could you sing something else?" Jim finally asked. 

"Sure, all you had to do was say something." Blair said smiling into the rearview mirror. Then he turned to Mey and said, "They're back there talking about us." 

"How do you know?" Mey smiled. 

"Jim has a look on his face, like I caught him in something." 

"Chief, I can hear you." Jim bellowed. 

"Oh yeah, I forgot. Fucking Sentinels." Blair laughed along with Mey. 

"Ellison, do you ever think about being with anyone else?" Harp asked in quiet voice. 

"No." 

"Never?" 

"No. And you better not be either." Jim ordered. 

"I'm not. I just wondered about you." 

"I'm happy. Why would I look for something else?" 

"I totally agree. I'm happy, why would I screw up me and Mey?" 

"Harp, need I remind you that you almost did?" 

"Ellison, I knew you would throw that in my face." Harp turned away and looked like he was done with the talk. 

"Just remember that, you asshole." Jim glared at Harp's back. 

"I can't believe that you would never think about doing it with anyone else." 

"What are you talking about? Do you see who I'm with? Do you see how gorgeous he is? I'm a fucking dick sometimes, but I know when I have it good." Jim beamed as he looked at his driving partner. 

"Ellison, can I tell you something?" 

"Why not? You're going to anyhow." Jim sat back for the bomb to hit. 

"If someone told me something at work about you and him, do you want to know?" Harp asked. 

"What do you mean? Me and him who?" 

"There is someone at work that told me that he was sleeping with you right now." Harp finally looked into Jim's eyes. 

"Is that what this is about? You think I'd fuck around on Blair?" 

"I don't know. This guy usually doesn't lie. I didn't know what to think." Harp stopped looking Jim in the eyes. 

"Who is it?" 

"Ellison, if you say it's not happening, that's all I need to hear." 

"Harp, this could get back to Blair and it would hurt us both. Now who are we talking about?" Jim was almost pleading by this time. 

"Jackson Evert." 

"You're shitting me. He's a fucking kid." Jim sat there in shock. 

"Well, that fucking kid told about ten people that you fuck him nightly before you go home to Blair." Harp wanted this over and done with. 

"I'll take care of it when I get back. Thanks for telling me." Jim leaned back and Harp could see that he was still plenty upset. 

"Ellison, I think you should tell Blair in case he's heard something." 

"Anyone need the rest stop?" Blair called out. 

"Yeah, I could use a quick rest." Harp answered. 

"I was joking, we've only been on the road for an hour." Blair teased. 

"But it took us seven hours to get to that point." Harp teased back. 

"Rest stop, it is." Blair pulled in and watched as everyone walked up. He pulled his cell out to call Connor. 

"Connor." 

"Hey baby, what you wearing?" Blair teased. 

"Hi, Sandy, how are you doing?" 

"I'm fine, but why do you sound upset?" 

"Oh Sandy, you always know when I'm upset. You need to talk to Jim about Jackson Evert. Let him explain." 

"What are you talking about?" Blair was confused. 

"I'm so sorry, honey. I have to go." 

Blair looked at his cell phone and shut it and then watched Jim come out to the MH. He got out and went into the restroom. Jim followed and asked, "Chief, something wrong?" 

"No, nothing's wrong. I found out about Jackson Evert. God, I hate you." And Blair began to get angrier. 

"Wait a minute! You're going to take someone else's word for it? Ask me if I fucked him?" Jim held on to Blair and the younger man could tell Jim was really upset. 

"Did you fuck him?" 

"I've never fucked him. I've only talked to him twice since he joined the force." Jim pulled Blair closer. 

"And he never fucked you?" 

"Never, babe. Never. I'm for you alone." Jim moved down and captured Blair's luscious lips with his own and only let go when he heard someone coming in. 

They walked back to the MH and Jim asked Harp if he would drive. Jim and Blair sat on the sofa and held each other. Mey came back and said, "Is everything all right?" 

"Everything's going to be fine, Mey. Someone at work is telling everyone that I fucked him. So Blair got the news from Connor, I assume, and he was upset." 

"Sandburg, he would never screw around on you." Mey assured him. 

"I know, I just needed to hear him say it to me." Blair said as he leaned in and kissed Jim again. 

"Everything will be fine, babe." Jim needed to tell Blair as much as himself. 

Blair took Jim up to the bed to rest. Both men felt like they had been up for days. 

Mey sat up front with Harp and they talked about the trip and what they had planned on doing. Then Harp asked, "Are they sleeping?" 

"I think so." Mey answered. 

"I hate rumors. And I accused him before I asked. I'm sure I hurt his feelings." 

"Well, you have the next couple of weeks to make it up to him, Harp." 

The two men held hands and talked quietly all the way to the next stop. 

@@@@@

When Meyer went in to pay for the gas, a guy was flirting with Harp in the grocery store section. Harp innocently flirted back as he got his items, unaware of Meyers watching him. When he walked out of the store, the Motor home was gone and Harp stood there looking around. 

"Excuse me, sir, did you see a huge Motor Home?" Harp asked the driver filling his tank. 

"Yes, he was right in front of me, but he left in a big hurry. Said something about a two timing son-of-a-bitch not being worth it." The man continued filling his tank not having a clue as to what was going on. 

Harp looked at his feet and realized he was barefoot. Then he realized he had no jacket, money (other than the change from his twenty), wallet, or cell phone. Fuck... 

He walked over and sat down on the sidewalk and pulled his bag up to him and started to open the chips he had bought. He could only hope that Mey would come back for him. Harp whispered into the cool evening air, "Mey, please?" 

Jim woke up and went down to see if one of the guys needed help with driving. He first relieved himself and then walked up front and sat in the passenger seat. "How long you been driving?" Jim asked. 

"About two hours or so." Meyers calmly said. 

"Harp hit the hay already?" Jim asked. 

"Don't have a clue." 

"What do you mean you don't have a clue?" Jim walked back to the bedroom and saw it empty and went back and asked, "Mey, where is he?" 

"About an hour and a half back at a gas station/grocery store. He was flirting with a guy and I left his ass there." Mey continued to drive. 

"Mey, you have to turn around." 

"Why?" 

Jim just looked at him oddly and said, "Don't you love him?" 

"Not any more." 

"Did he have money, Mey?" 

"Who cares?" 

"You care, damn it." Jim spat out. 

"No, he left his wallet here." 

"Did he have his jacket?" 

"No, he left his jacket here, too." Mey was beginning to feel badly. 

"Well, at least he was wearing shoes." Jim said smiling. 

"Actually, he wasn't." Mey said. 

"Fuck... Mey, we need to turn around. Someone could pick him up and hurt him." Jim was hoping to scare him. 

"Hey, if they want to hurt him, more power to them." 

"Quit the bullshit. I know you love that man. Turn around now or I'll pull out the big guns." Jim said with a smile on his face.

"Don't wake Sandburg up. I'll turn around." Mey said as he turned and they headed back to the freaking station. 

"Mey, once we get there let me go in and talk to him first." Jim planned. 

"Jim, I probably have a better chance against him if he's really pissed off. He's not going to hit me." Meyers said. 

"Fine, do whatever you want. Just know that this is going on the fucking list of things to remind Sandburg of when we ask friends to go on trips again." Jim stormed away and climbed up to the cab over bed and lay back down next to Blair. 

At the station Harp was sitting on the stoop freezing his balls off. He couldn't believe how cold it got once the sun went down. His teeth were chattering and he had come to a decision. There was no way Kelly Harper was going to stay with a man that dumped him on the side of the road. Now if Meyers would just come back long enough to pick him up, he could get his things and move on down the road. 

Jim moved down to the front seat again, so that he could keep Meyers company until they found Harp. 

It took longer to get back to the station than Meyers had remembered, but once they got they parked and looked around. 

"He's coming up on your side and he's not a happy camper." Jim said getting out the door. "Hey Harp." 

"Don't fucking hey Harp me. I can't believe you all left me there." Harper walked over to Jim's side and started shoving Jim into the side of the vehicle. Jim didn't back down at all. Blair walked out the door and said, "What's going on?" 

"You didn't even tell Sandburg?" Harper asked incredulously. 

"Harp, I didn't even find out till I woke up and then I talked him into turning around." Jim said coldly. Jim didn't like being pushed by anyone. So, he shoved Harp right back. 

"You think that's going to make me feel better, Ellison?" Harper took a swing and missed Jim, but Jim was ready and Jim took a swing at Harp and connected. Meyers came over and pulled the two men apart and said, "Harp, come here." 

Harper followed Meyers over to the end of the Motor home and said, "This is bullshit. You're mad at me, not Jim. So knock it off. Don't even think about hitting him again." 

"You asshole, he hit me; I didn't hit him. I missed on fucking purpose. And I'm freezing my ass off. I've got to get some things out of the van and then I'll be out of your hair." Harper walked into the Motor home and started packing and getting dressed in some warmer clothing. 

"Guys, you have to help me here." Mey begged. 

"You're the one that left him, Mey." Blair said angrily. 

"You're mad at me too, Sandburg?" 

"Yeah, that was dangerous. Something could have happened to him. You left him defenseless." Blair gave him the same lecture that Jim had given earlier. 

Mey walked into the Motor home defeated and Blair looked at Jim knowing something was coming. "Just say it." 

"Chief, add this to that fucking list of things to remember about why we don't want to travel with friends." 

"Fuck you, Ellison." Blair stormed into the vehicle and slammed the door. Harp and Meyers could see it might be catching. 

Back in the bedroom Meyers was sweet-talking Harper into staying with him. "Harp, if you're going to stay with me, you have to stay with me. I can't deal with you being with anyone else." 

"Mey, I would never be with anyone else. Someone was smiling at me. It made me feel good. I'm sorry. I won't smile back ever again. I promise." Harp pulled him on top of him and they began to kiss. 

"I might have been overreacting. I'm sorry." Mey continued the kiss. 

"I'll try to be more thoughtful, Mey. I'm sorry." 

Jim got into the van and started it up and began the drive. He figured he could get a few hundred miles under his belt before he had to sleep. He had heard the lovebirds make up and knew that they were on the road again. 

Blair sat up next to Jim and just stared at him. Jim didn't say a word. "Jim, I'm sorry. I love you so much." 

"I love you, too. Wait till we stop and I'll show you just how much." Jim said smiling over at his love. 

"Did you mean it about not traveling with friends?" Blair asked. 

"More or less. I think it tears apart friendships. So that bothers me." Jim thought he had that pretty much figured out. 

"But I love Harp and Mey more than I love anyone else besides you. So I would hope that we could get through a vacation without a fight." Blair hoped that Jim would understand his feelings. 

"Where too, Boss?" Jim asked. 

"Pull over here so I can show you what I found." Blair said holding the map. 

Blair pointed it out and Jim smiled because there was fishing and swimming. It was going to be fun. This vacation was looking up big time. 

@@@@@

"Hey Jim, it says here that there is skinny dipping year round in the warm springs. Want to do it?" 

"What do you think?" Jim snarled. "The fishing part sounds fantastic." 

Meyers came walking out and sat behind Jim's seat and said, "So what am I missing?" 

"Hey Mey, want to go skinny dipping with me in the warm springs tomorrow?" Blair asked bouncing in his seat. 

"Sounds like fun to me." Mey answered. 

"What sounds like fun?" Harp asked as he sat in the chair behind Blair. 

"Me and Blair are going to go skinny dippy in the hot springs tomorrow. Doesn't that sound fun?" Mey was now bouncing just like Blair. 

"I don't know about you, Ellison, but I think I'll go along." Harper tried not to sound irritated. 

"Yeah, if you're all going I'll go, too." Jim added. 

"Way cool." Blair turned up and music and he and Mey started singing some stupid song that both of the older men hated. 

"Done much fishing?" Jim asked Harp. 

"Once, I think." 

"Well, we're going to make up for it here. This place sounds like a perfect place to fish, swim and do the hot springs. It's going to be great." Jim smiled. 

"I'll take your word for it, Jim." Harp said nervously. 

"Okay, what's the problem?" Jim pulled over to the side of the road, again. "We're never going to get there with all this stopping." 

Harp walked out the door hoping that Jim would follow him out. 

"All right, fill me in. What's wrong?" Jim asked. 

"Honestly? I'm nervous about taking all my clothes off in front of you guys." Harp looked at the floor. 

Jim threw his head back and laughed. He couldn't help it. "You crack me up, tall stuff. Why would you be worried?" 

"Well, what if what looks good to one person doesn't look as good to the next? It could happen. Stop that fucking laughing. I'll remember this when you need a good friend." Harp whined. 

"I'm sorry. Come here." Jim pulled Harp into a huge hug and said, now how hard do you want me to hug you?" 

"Fuck you, Ellison." 

"Maybe later after we go fishing." Jim kissed Harp and laughed as Harp stormed off pissed off. 

Blair walked out and said, "What's going on with Harp? He seemed upset?" 

"God, I love to tease our friends." Jim smiled as Blair. 

"Leave poor Harp alone." Blair smiled as he watched him, knowing that Harp was cutest when angry. 

"Hey, let's leave Harp behind again as a joke and see how long it takes him to notice we're just down the road." Jim laughed at the look on Blair and Meyers face. 

Harp came around the bend and said, "Thanks a lot, Ellison. Fuck you." He stormed into the Motor home and went into their bedroom, slamming the door. 

"Ya did it now." Blair laughed as he got into the driver's seat. 

"Hey I was driving." Jim called from the doorway. 

"Get your ass in or I'm leaving it along the side of the road." Blair said starting to move the damn vehicle. 

Harper came running out of the bedroom and said, "Sandburg, Meyers is out there. Stop." 

Jim fell onto the floor laughing so hard he couldn't breathe well. Harp stood over him and asked, "If that was Sandburg would you be laughing?" 

"No. I'm sorry, Harp. I'm sorry, Meyers." Jim went and sat in the passenger seat and leaned against the window and began to laugh softly. Blair didn't try and hide it. He was laughing outright. 

"Sandburg, you think it's funny that you could have killed my boyfriend?" Harp asked. 

All three men burst out laughing. 

"What?" 

"Well, babe, it just sounds funny when my 6' 8" lover says boyfriend. It took us off guard." Meyers tried to make him feel better. 

Meyers was already on the floor from laughing so Harper lay on top of him and started making out with said boyfriend. 

"Not here. Let's go to bed." Meyers said quietly. 

"Nah, here is just fine." Harp said as he began to strip Meyers. 

Jim got out of his seat and walked over to them and got on the floor, also. "Hey, how does a guy get into this?" 

"Get out of here, Ellison." Harper snapped. 

"Take him in the bedroom. He doesn't deserve to be fucked in front of us, Harp. Now get your ass up and show him a good time. Just not here." Jim ordered. 

"Bossy bitch, isn't he?" Harp said as he was walking back to their room. 

"You better believe it, Harper." Jim yelled. 

"What was that all about?" Blair asked. 

Jim explained what he had told Harp and Blair laughed and said, "He can't win this trip. Poor thing is going to go home with a complex." 

Blair drove for about six more hours and they arrived at the campground for the Motor Homes. Jim was so excited about fishing he couldn't wait. 

They checked in and got maps and lists of what all there was to do in the campgrounds. 

"Jim, do you see all of this stuff we can do while we're here?" Blair asked beginning his bounce. 

Jim leaned in and kissed him and said, "Yup. I think we should stay more than two days. What do you think?" 

"Ask the guys if they want to stay longer." 

"Harp, you guys want to stay a few days extra?" Jim called out. 

"Hell yes, this place is really nice." Harper said. 

"Guess what? They have a super clean shower. Us tall guys can take a shower in a grown up stall." Meyer laughed at the look on Blair's face. 

"Fine! Make fun of the short guy." 

Jim started to get all of the fishing equipment out right off. He could hardly wait to show Harper how much fun it could be. Blair walked by and said, "Should I be jealous?" 

Smiling up at his love Jim answered, "Nah. I love to fish is all." 

Mey came walking in and said, "I found out where the hot springs were. So who's game?" 

"I am." Blair answered pulling Jim along with him to get ready. 

"Well, I guess I am too, then." 

"Why do you all want to skinny dip? That's just dumb. I think I'll sit here and watch television." Harper sat down and started flipping through the channels. 

"No way." Jim shouted from above, "If I have to go, you do too. So get your trunks on right now." 

"Shit... No one asked me what I wanted to do. Damn it anyhow." Harper stomped off into their bedroom and slammed the door. 

"He's so cute when he throws tanty's." Mey smiled at the door waiting for his man. 

The four men walked down to the bank and saw tons of people, all in the nude. They were just walking around, as if this happened every single day. Blair slipped his trunks off first and jumped into the springs. Mey took his off and turned to ask Harp something and Jim's mouth just fell open. Mey looked at Jim and asked, "Something wrong, Jim?" 

"No, nothing's wrong. I have to talk to Harp is all." 

Mey jumped into the springs and found Blair right away. On the bank Jim stood still dressed with Harp. "You lied to me." Jim shouted. 

"I know I lied. I couldn't help it. I didn't want you to think that Mey's cock was bigger than mine." 

"It is bigger. Jesus, that sucker is huge. I think I hate him." Jim sighed. 

"Tell me about it. He doesn't even notice how nice it is." Harp sat down next to Jim on the ground. 

"Have you ever measured it?" 

"Hell no. I would just be depressed." Harp wasn't kidding. 

"Well, we better get in, I guess." Jim said as he slid his trunks off. 

Harp took his off and Jim looked over and said, "You lying sack of shit. You're the same size as I am." 

"Well, I couldn't have you thinking I was this tall with this small of cock." 

"Wait a minute, you told me that my size was respectable." Jim added. 

"I was drunk and I lied." 

"Fucker." Jim jumped into the springs, followed by Harp. 

Harp swam up next to Jim and said, "You look really good naked." 

"Too late for sweet talk." Jim didn't know why he was angry, but he was. "Wait a minute, why are you looking at me naked anyhow?" 

"For the same reason that you were checking my cock size out on the bank." 

"Well if you must know the truth, you look great naked. But I won't ever say it again." Jim swam off to be with Blair. 

Blair kissed Jim and asked, "What do you want to do in the morning?" 

"What do you think?" Jim smiled at his love. 

"You sex fiend, you." Blair couldn't believe how sexy this man was. 

"Chief, I meant fishing." 

“Well, that sounds good too. Geeze, our friends are making love with us in the same springs. There’s certain things you just don’t do in front of your friends, that’s one of them.”

“They walked out of the spring and made their way back to the motor home. 

Once inside, Blair slid into the bed and stripped his shorts off. Once he was naked, he moved up against Jim and began to kiss his back. In between kisses, he softly whispered sweet nothings. Jim's back was less tense, so he knew it was working. 

Blair went into Jim's arms and just held on. "I love you, Jim. I love you so much." 

"Good. Can we just hold each other tonight? I'm in the mood for cuddling. Is that all right?" 

“That’s fine. Can I go fishing with you in the morning?" 

"I would love to have you come along, my little guppy. I'm glad you're my love, Chief." 

"I promise to love you forever." 

"I love you back, Blair." 

The next week went well. They all had fun fishing, swimming and hiking. They all hated to leave the place. Standing in the regular shower stalls were becoming addicting. 

"Hey Jim, I got us a vanity plate." Blair called out holding a bag. 

"Let's see this." Jim held his hand out and started laughing. 

"What?" Harp asked as he looked at it. "This is perfect, let me put it on." 

Mey came out of the room and said, "What's going on." 

"Harp is putting the new vanity plate on." Blair said laughing. 

"Oh? What does it say?" 

"Chic magnet." Jim joined in with the laughing. 

As Harp got into the vehicle, he said, "Jim, something smells out there." 

"Yeah, we need to stop and empty that tank." Jim agreed. 

"Now, who is going to be first?" Blair asked. 

"Jim is first since he's the oldest." Harp couldn't help but laugh. 

"No, I can't do it, guys. You know my sense of smell would have a fit. And Harp, we're only a month apart." 

"And like ours wouldn't?" Blair asked. "You are doing it, mister." 

Jim stormed up to the front and drove to the next city and found a place to empty the tanks. He put his shirt across his nose and mouth as he emptied it. It didn't help. He was gagging the entire time and got very sick to his stomach. When he was done, he came in and washed his hands and face and went up to lie down. 

"Well, I think that went pretty well." Harp said getting into the driver's seat. 

"Fuck you, Harp." Jim called down. "You're nothing but a big fat liar anyhow." 

"What's he talking about, Harp?" Mey asked. 

"I don't know. He's high on gasses or something." Harp drove off and howled the whole way. 

"Just keep laughing, funny boy." Jim spat out. 

Mey looked at Blair and said, "How much further to where we're going? They might kill each other by then." 

"I wonder why he called him a big fat liar?" Blair whispered. 

"I'm going to go up and ask." Mey made a cup of tea and took it upstairs for Jim's sick stomach. "Feel like a little mint tea?" 

"That would be good, Mey. Thank you." Jim got up on his elbows and drank. "I can't get out of this friggin' Motor Home soon enough. It's made for midgets." 

"I'm with you on that, Ellison. Now share with me about why Harp is a big fat liar." 

"It's embarrassing." Jim blushed. 

"Everything with Harp is embarrassing. Now, tell me what he said or did." Mey wasn't backing down. 

"When we were in California with you we got drunk and he told me how big my cock was and how big his was. He said he had the biggest one and yours was the same size as mine. Or maybe an inch bigger. Whatever... At any rate, he takes his clothes off today, and he's the same fucking size as I am. So he's a big fat liar." 

Mey almost fell over the edge of the bed and said, "Ellison, I can't believe you were measuring your cocks." 

"We were pretty drunk." 

"I think you were drunk and walking the wild side of becoming an idiot with Harp." 

"Well, he would have been safe except I saw yours." Jim put his hand over his mouth as soon as he said it. "Sorry." 

"What about mine?" Mey teased him. 

"It's mighty fine, Mey. But not at all as Harp described it." Jim rolled over and hoped Mey would leave. 

"Talk to you later on. I have to go tell Sandburg now." Mey started down the stairs and Jim grabbed his arm. "Please don't tell Blair what I just said. Please?" 

"Okay, since you said please." Mey walked down and went into the back bedroom and called out, "Sandburg, could I see you for a minute." 

"Shit..." Jim whispered. 

"Ellison, you better not have said anything." Harp yelled up to Jim. 

"I told him everything." 

"Fuck..." Harp waited for yelling or something. 

Laughter broke out from the room and the two didn't seem to be in a bad mood. So Jim and Harp figured they were very lucky.

They came walking out with a measuring tape. Jim put the pillow over his head hoping they would all go away. Add this to another reason you don't want to travel with friends. 

Jim felt two bodies on the bed and lifted the pillow up. "Hey Jim, we're here to measure you. It's only fair." Blair said as he unzipped Jim's jeans. 

"Chief, come on. Let's not do this. All right?" 

Blair and Mey started laughing and said, "Did you learn anything?" 

"Yeah." Jim said quietly. 

"What?" Blair asked. 

"Not to pack a tape measure when traveling." Jim answered truthfully. 

"Wrong." Blair swatted Jim on the head. 

"It doesn't matter what size you are?" Jim guessed. 

"Much better." Mey said as they left Jim alone. 

They walked down the stairs for the other idiot. 

"Okay, Sandburg, you turn away while I do Harp." Mey laughed at the look on Harps face. 

"What are you doing?" 

"I'm going to measure you." Harp said. 

"Measure me for what? I'm driving for Christ's sake." 

"Well, size seems to be an issue with you and Ellison, so we'll put your minds at rest." Mey pulled the tape out and unzipped Harp's pants. 

"Mey, please?" 

"Okay, now what did you learn from this?" Mey asked angrily. 

"Not to measure penis's?" Mey asked and they could hear Jim laughing from up above. 

"Yes, in a way. Don't dwell on who has the best one, instead worry about making yours work the best. Think about that, Harp." Mey smiled as he walked away. 

"You mean you don't think mine works good enough?" Harp asked. 

Sandburg and Meyers went back to the room again and there was more laughing and talking. 

Jim came down and said, "I don't think I would measure up to what Blair wants." 

"Tell me about it. It's a fucking shame that we can't have dicks that match our height." Harp seemed angry. 

"Are you mad at Mey?" 

"No, I'm mad at me. I always do stupid shit and then he gets pissed off." 

"Same here. Sandburg is mad at me more than he isn't. I hate that." Jim listened for conversation, but there was none. "Hell! I think they feel asleep back there." 

"Probably from all of the laughing. Wore them the fuck out." Harp said angrily. 

"Harp, this is our turn. We're in Seattle. Do you have the directions to the house?" Jim asked. 

"Yeah, they're right here." Jim read them and helped Harp drive to the front of the house. 

Both men looked out the window when they stopped and Jim spoke in a whisper, "No way will he give this up." 

"I wouldn't." Harp agreed. 

Mey and Blair came out of the back room and Blair said, "Holey Moley, Batman. That's some house, eh?" 

"No shit." replied Meyers. 

"Should we go in, Robin?" Jim asked. 

"No, I think we should just sit out here in the Motor Home and dream about the house." A sleepy Sandburg was a grumpy Sandburg. 

Blair took the key and opened up the front door. All four men stood with their mouths hanging open. It was a gorgeous home. And it sat right on the lake. It was a dream home for anyone. 

Blair noticed that Jim was unusually quiet and was pulling away from him. "Let's pick out our room. What do you say?" Blair pulled Jim by his hand and they went up the stairs. "Oh man, this is it. Look at this room, babe. And the bathroom is to die for. No bending in the shower for you. Unless you want." No smile was evident as Blair pulled Jim close to him and down for a kiss. 

"This room's great, Chief. I'm really tired. I'm going to go get some clothes from the MH and bring them in here." Jim started out the doorway and Blair asked, "Will you bring some for me, too?" 

And Blair heard a very quiet, "Of course." 

Jim heard Harp and Mey in their room already fooling around. Jim tried to hurry and get the clothes so he could get in their room and shut the door. Another reason why you don't want to travel with friends. You can hear them fuck. 

Blair was in the shower when he got back to the room. He set the suitcases down and stripped and climbed into bed. He was almost asleep when Blair crawled into bed. 

"Hey man. You going to go to sleep without saying goodnight to me?" 

"Sorry, Chief. I got really sleepy. I'm sorry. Goodnight, babe." 

"Jim, I love you so much. Thanks for putting up with the guys and me. I know we've been a pain in the butt." Blair kissed Jim's back softly. 

"Night, Chief." Jim moved further away from Blair and pretended he really wanted to sleep. 

Blair got out of bed and got dressed. He walked to the door where their friends were sleeping and knocked. 

"Now wouldn't be a good time." Harp yelled out. 

"Okay, sorry." Blair said pitifully. 

"You jerk, now go see what's wrong." Mey shoved him out of the bed. 

Pulling some clothes on, he almost ran down the stairs and said, "What's wrong? Mey wants to know." 

"Nothing. No biggy. My lover isn't talking to me and doesn't want me." Blair never looked sadder. 

"He's just being a jerk." 

"I was mean to him or something. I don't want him to dump me." Blair whispered. 

"Okay, promise not to tell?" Blair shook his head yes, "Jim's afraid he's not going to be good enough for you now. With all of the money, cars and houses. He's feeling a little inadequate." 

"Serious? You think that's it?" Blair almost looked happy. 

"Well, one more thing. He thinks size does matter and I think you guys talking about doing the measuring thing today blew all confidence that he had." Harp said. 

"He's got a nice cock." Blair said adamantly. 

"He does. I'm not arguing. I'm just saying, he's feeling inadequate." 

"Shit, I knew I shouldn't have done that." Blair started pacing. "How can I make it better?" 

"Lie to him." Harp smiled over to Blair and knew Blair was going to go for it. 

"You got it. Night, Harp." Blair ran up the stairs smiling. 

Blair stripped and got into bed with Jim. "Babe, I'm so glad I have you to share all of this with. I'd be lost if you ever left me. Promise you won't ever leave me." Blair begged. 

Jim turned towards Blair and held on tight. "I promise." 

As Blair moved down Jim's body, he started licking Jim's cock and he whispered, "You have the most beautiful cock I've ever seen. Have I ever told you that before?" 

"No. It's not that big." Jim's cock started deflating. 

"Yeah, it is. Guess what? You and I only have one half inch difference. And yours is bigger than Harp's. But don't tell him I said that okay?" 

"Chief, I know he isn't smaller. I know you're not the same size as me. Being a Sentinel sometimes sucks. I can tell this shit. So stop lying to me." 

"Are you telling me, I'm never going to get this fine cock up my ass again?" 

"No, I never said that. I just have to get over the fact that everyone knows my cock is small." Jim said sadly. 

"Who started this shit, Jim?" 

"I know it was me and Harp in Calif. But we were drunk. I just wish I hadn't seen all of our friends naked." 

"All right, I've had it." Blair jumped up and ran to get Harp. It was all his fucking fault anyhow. 

Blair beat on the door and Harp answered it naked. "Perfect! Come with me." Blair pulled him into their bedroom. 

"What?" Harp said suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable being in the nude with his friends. 

"Jim, check this out." Blair ordered. 

Jim got out of bed and looked very closely at Harps cock and said, "Okay, you're right." 

"Night, Harp." Blair shoved him out of the room. 

"Wait a minute, what are you right about? Jim, is this about the measurements?" Harp was standing at the door. 

Jim opened it up and said, "Yup, and you came in first. Lucky stiff. Now, go and make it stiff for Mey." Jim shut the door before Harp had a chance to even answer. 

Jim made sweet love to Blair at first, until Blair asked for it hard. Jim loved to fuck Blair hard. Blair was howling as he came and Jim screamed out Blair's name as he followed close behind. 

Blair lay in Jim's arms and was very content. Jim kissed his ear and whispered, "And we are the same size. But I wouldn't care anyhow." 

"Good, because I love that cock. I love you, Jim." 

"I love you, Chief. Goodnight." And both men fell into a deep sleep. 

@@@@@

Jim opened up his eyes to his favorite sight. Blair still sleeping in the morning. Jim slipped his hand across Blair's flaccid cock and smiled as it began to harden within moments. The moan would come quickly after that, and sure enough, his lover moaned huskily. "What are you doing, man?" 

"Chief, if I have to tell you I must be doing it wrong." Jim started to pull his hand away from Blair's cock. The younger man laughed and pulled the large hand back over it and helped him resume the stroking. 

"Feel good, baby?" Jim teased as the stroking began to get faster. 

"I'm not going to last long, man. I want you to come with me." 

"I want you to just lay back and relax." Jim moved over Blair and began licking his way down Blair's chest and stomach. This Sentinel could hear every single sound and hitch in his guide's breath, to show him what felt the best. Before long, Jim engulfed Blair's cock and sucked slowly while rubbing his balls. 

"Jim, I'm going to come already. Stop..." 

Jim pulled his mouth away from Blair's cock and said, "I love you, Blair." And then he went down on him again. Jim opened his throat up to accept as much as he could take. Blair was trying to fight the orgasm, but he lost the battle and came screaming Jim's name. 

Blair caught his breath and then pushed Jim over onto his back and began doing the same thing. Jim was ready and had hoped that he had more control than Blair did. But in reality he had less. Blair sucked twice and slid his finger in Jim's sweet hole and Jim came screaming Blair's name. 

Jim was trying to get his eyesight working again, when there was a knock at the door. 

"Hey, now that role call is over, can we go out to breakfast?" Mey asked merrily. 

"We'll be down in a few minutes, smart ass." Jim got up and pulled Blair into the shower. 

"Thank you, big man. I love you, too." Blair went into Jim's arms and they just stood there hugging. "Is something wrong, Blair?" 

"No, I just love you and wanted you to know that." 

Jim heard something in his voice and was scared right away. "Jim, calm down. Nothing is wrong. I'm just nervous about the meeting at the lawyer today. Please just ignore my moods, okay?" 

"I love you, babe. More than you could ever know." Jim kissed the top of his head and they moved into the shower. 

"Hey hot shot, what do you think of shower sex?" Blair giggled, he couldn't help it. 

"I think of it every chance I can." 

So that's just what they did. 

"Jesus, they have sex a lot, don't they?" Harp complained. 

"We could too, ya know." 

"Mey, we already fucked around this morning, why would we do it again?" Harp was honestly bewildered by all this. 

"Harp, you are the most unromantic man in the world." Mey walked away from his lover, shoulders slumped. 

They were in the kitchen and Harp knew that Jim and Blair would be awhile so he walked over and kissed the back of Meyers neck. He loved how Mey got goosebumps every time Harp did this. He then reached around and undid his shirt and played with Mey's nipples, until they became hard and firm. Harp slid his hand inside Mey's jeans and felt how hard and ready he already was. Harp then moved around to the front of Mey and pulled his jeans down and then his boxers. Harp leaned Mey back to the table and slid him up on it. He sucked Mey's cock a few times and then got a tube of lube from the counter. He loosened him up and once he was, he slid into his love. Harp was paying no attention to what was going on other than he and Mey. In the doorway was Jim and Blair with their mouths hanging open. 

Harp was chanting by this time. "God, baby you feel so good. I love your ass. Come with me, Mey. Come with me." Harp stroked Mey until he came with a yell. 

Harp lasted a little longer. He was trying to keep his mind on other things so he could last longer, but that didn't work. He heard Jim say, "Oh shit..." And that was all she wrote. Harp came, fast and hard into his favorite place in the world. 

"They saw us, baby." Harp whispered. 

"It's okay, Harp. It's okay." Mey smiled as Harp pulled out of him. 

"Shit... I don't like that they walked in on us. Now they know how we look while we do it." Harp said pacing. 

"Hey big shot, how about something to clean myself up here?" Mey called out to see if he could get his attention. "Maybe I could just call Jim in to help clean me up." 

"Don't ever fucking say that again, Mey. He doesn't get to see you or touch you. Understood?" Harp was one pissed off lover. 

"Okay, calm down, Harp." 

In the living room Jim was smiling and said, "Mey just made Harp jealous and I swear I can hear Mey's heart doing a little dance with happiness." 

"Did I tell you today how much I love you?" Blair asked, smiling up at his love. 

"Why? Why are you saying that?" 

"Because you're so cute. You try to be all tough, but you love Harp and Mey as much as I do." 

"Yeah, I do. So, we're going to the lawyer today?" Jim asked, voice almost shaking. 

"Yeah, I have to tell them if I want to keep the house, the car and the MH. The appointment is at 11:00. So we've got to get shaking soon." 

"Harp, do you and Mey want to go to the lawyers with us?" Jim called out. 

Harp stuck his face through the doorway and said, "Nah, we'll wait here. Good luck, Sandburg." 

"Thanks, Harp." Blair took Jim's hand and they walked out the door. Jim had the directions so he knew where he was going, more or less. 

Once there, they sat in the waiting room until the lawyer called for them. "Mr. Sandburg, will you follow me?" And he walked down a hallway with Blair and Jim following him. 

They walked into the huge office and the man turned and said, "I'm Mr. Martin Miller. Please have a seat, Mr. Sandburg. I'm going to be taking care of everything here in Seattle. Have you decided if you want the house yet or not? And how about the Motor Home?" 

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Miller. This is my partner Jim Ellison. Yes, I've made all of the decisions." 

Jim looked at Blair oddly because for some reason, Jim had thought Blair would ask his opinion. And this hurt. 

"Well, tell me what you want and I'll take care of it." Miller said. 

"I want to sell the house and the Motor Home and the car. I want the money to go into these accounts." Blair slid a paper over to him and Jim again wondered why Blair hadn't discussed any of this with him. 

"Okay, I'll put the house up tomorrow, I've had someone interested for some time, so that will go fast. The price back then was one million so you'll make out very well with the sale. The Motor Home will probably pull in about $190,000.00, so again, you'll make out well." 

"That's great. We're going to stay in a hotel by the airport and fly home in a week. So here is the number, I called this morning and got the reservations. Will I have to come back for many things?" Blair wondered aloud. Jim wondered when he had made the phone calls. Jim missed them all. 

"No, you won't. Most of it can be done by fax. Give me your fax number at work and we'll get all of this started. It was good to meet you, Mr. Sandburg." He shook Blair's hand and then sat down and started doing his work. 

Jim realized that he was just treated like the wife. He always wondered what that would feel like. Now he knew. It sucked. Jim Ellison was no ones wife. 

Jim was walking so fast that Blair had to jog to keep up with him. "Hey, hot stuff. Wanna slow down?" 

"I have things to do, Chief. I'm going to fly home today." 

"What are you talking about?" 

"I'm talking about having a fucking life outside of you and I'm going home today. I'll make the flight reservations when I get to that house of yours." Jim continued to almost run. 

Blair knew he was in trouble and he was scared. Jim was leaving him. He needed some help on this. 

Neither man said one word all the way home. In the driveway, Blair whispered, "Jim, you're leaving me aren't you?" 

"I just told you I'm going home." Jim walked up to the front door. 

"I don't mean going home. I mean leaving my heart." Blair was very upset. 

"Don't be silly, Sandburg. I'll see you in Cascade. I just need to go home." 

"Don't worry, Ellison, I don't really care anymore." Blair shoved the door open and rushed up the stairs. 

Harp and Mey watched the two enter and Harp said, "What the fuck did you do now, Ellison?" 

"I'll have you know that I didn't do a fucking thing. I'm just going home is all." Jim sat down across from them, but didn't look at them. 

"And this is why he was so upset?" Mey asked. 

"How the fuck do I know why he's upset? I didn't do anything." Jim said. 

"Start from the beginning and tell us what happened. There has to be something you're not telling us." Mey knew there was a mistake. 

So, Jim told him all about Blair making all of the decisions without talking to him first, having a list of things he was going to do with his money, called and made reservations at a hotel and finally when they left, the lawyer totally ignored him, just as he would have treated a wife. 

"Ellison, I hate to take Sandburg's side, cuz he pisses me off a lot, but it's his money. He can do whatever he wants to do with it." Harp said calmly. 

"I know it's his money. I didn't want him to ask my opinion. I just wanted him to at least let me hear about it." Jim was getting sadder by the moment. 

"Did you hate being the wife?" Mey asked. 

"Yeah, I did." 

"We all do, Jim. But grow up and live with it. That wasn't Blair's fault." Mey continued. 

"He didn't even try and stick up for me at the lawyer's office. It was like he agreed with him." 

"So you're going home today?" Harp asked. 

"Yeah." Jim looked out the window so he wouldn't have to look at his friends. 

"Well I'll go home with you and Mey can stay and keep Sandburg company. How does that sound?" Harp offered. 

"Nah, thanks anyhow. I have to go by myself." Jim got up and headed upstairs to pack. 

Jim walked into their room and tried to ignore the sniffling coming from his partner. He pulled his suitcase out of the closet and started to pack. Blair looked at him and said, "You're packing? You're really going? Please don't leave me, Jim." 

"Chief, knock it off. I'm not staying just because you're crying. So stop the crying now." 

Blair did, he stopped and finally got himself under control and stood up and put his arms around Jim. "Please don't leave me, Jim. Please?" 

"Chief, I'm just going home. I'll be waiting for you when you get back." 

Blair wouldn't let go of Jim's waist. So Jim walked around with Blair hooked onto him and finally Jim said, "Knock it off, Sandburg." 

Blair stood straight and walked out of the room and didn't look back. When Jim was done packing, he took a shower. He looked out the shower door and Harp was standing there glaring. 

"Harp, do you mind?" 

"Yeah, I do. He's a nice guy, Ellison. Why are you doing this? You always tell me not to hurt Mey and now you're doing it to Sandburg." 

"He'll leave me soon anyhow, Harp. Can you honestly see him staying with me now that he has all of that money?" Jim got out of the shower and began to dry off. 

"You're such a chicken shit. Talk to him. I don't say it's going to make things better, but talk to him." Harp then walked out of the bathroom, leaving Jim Ellison with way too much on his mind. 

Once he was dressed he yelled down the stairs, "Chief, can I talk to you for a moment?" 

Jim then waited in their room to see if Blair would come. He looked up and saw Blair standing in the doorway. "Come in and shut the door. I need to ask you some things." 

"Okay." Blair shut the door and sat on a chair far away from Jim. 

"Chief, I need to know where I belong in your life, okay?" 

"Okay..." 

Jim saw this going downhill fast with Blair's lack of response. "When we got to the lawyers office you told him you had made your mind up about selling everything. And I realized that you didn't care what I thought about them. You never asked me about any of it. And for some reason I thought we would discuss it." 

Blair glared at him and said, "I don't have to discuss it with you. They were mine, Jim." 

"That's all I needed to know. Because I have all sorts of stocks from my military money and I put half of them in your name. I didn't tell you because it was a surprise. But I figured you should know that you have stocks and bonds through my lawyers. I just wanted to tell you." Jim sat on the bed sadly. 

"Jim, I told you when we went on this trip that I'd probably sell it all. Don't you remember?" 

"Yeah, Chief, I remember. Thanks for telling me." Jim got up and Blair ran and grabbed him. "Okay, I lied." 

"You lied about what, Chief?" 

"I lied about not discussing it because it was mine." 

"So what is it about?" Jim pushed him on the bed so they could relax and talk. 

"I'm setting up trust funds for everyone. I've never had this much money in my life. But the better part of it, is going into a trust fund for you. But all of our friends are getting some of this and Daryl won't have to worry about college at all. Anyhow, it was a surprise and I didn't want to tell you." 

"You should have told me though, Blair." 

Blair knew things were bad if he just called him Blair again. "What's the next thing that bothered you, Jim?" 

"You made reservations at a hotel and didn't even tell me or the guys. We had no idea what was going on. I just felt like you didn't want to share anything with me. And I don't mean monetary." 

"Anything else?" 

"Yeah, there is. You didn't fucking stick up for me in that pricks office. He dismissed me like a wife and it hurt so bad." Jim was trying not to cry. He hated crying. Very unmanly. 

“Jim, I was wrong. I’m sorry,” Blair said. 

"Please love me. Please need me." And then Jim started to shake. 

"Jim, I do love you and need you. Now come here. Let's lay down on the bed." Jim joined Blair in bed. They both stripped down to boxers and slid under the covers. There would be no sex right now. Jim needed to be held. 

As he petted Jim's head, Blair said, "I called the lawyer in Cascade and told him how he had treated you. I also told him I wasn't happy with him at all. He treated us badly. So anyhow, all of the paperwork will be transferred to Cascade and we'll do it there. He told me where to drop off the Motor Home. Jim, I was going to do it anyhow. I hated the way he looked at you and treated you. But I'm sorry that I didn't say anything on the drive home." 

"Blair, I can't keep doing this." 

"What?" 

"Fucking up. One of these times you're going to leave." 

"Jim, I'm never leaving you. I love you so much." This time Blair was the one upset. Jim held on to him tightly and they both fell asleep. 

"Harp, I just want you to go in there and be sure they're all right. Do it." Mey pushed him through the doorway. 

Harp walked over to the bed and saw the men sleeping, well, Blair was. Jim was staring at him. "We're fine, Harp. Thanks for checking on us though. Want to go fishing tomorrow?" 

"That would be great, Ellison." 

"Ask Mey if he wants to go too and I'll ask the Chief when he's awake." 

"The Chief is awake and yeah, fishing sounds fun. Night, Harp." 

"Night, Sandburg. Night, Ellison." 

Out in the hallway Harp said, "Want to go fishing with them in the morning?" 

"Oh Christ, I'm so glad they're all right. They're our best friends, aren't they, Harp?" 

"Yeah, they are. Now come to bed. We have to get up early to get that worm." 

"Harp, want to see my worm?" 

"Yeah, I would. Get your butt in our bed." 

"Get over here, Kelly." Mey called out. 

"Stop calling me Kelly." 

"Kelly baby, that's your name." 

"I hated my mom." 

"I didn't. Come here, my big boy." 

Jim smiled as he held his sleeping partner. He realized that things had come close, but thanks to good friends he and Blair were still together. He was going to ask Blair if they could rent a car tomorrow and drive home. Okay, maybe not a car, a big SUV. Jim realized he really liked being on the road again with all of them. With that thought, he fell into a quiet peaceful sleep and knew he would wake to a beautiful day. 

The guys spent the next four days, fishing and having fun. Jim had rented a large SUV and they were packing up for the trip back to Cascade. 

"Me and Mey get the front seat this time." Blair said laughing. 

"Fine, we'll sleep." Jim said smiling back at him. 

Harper got in the back seat and said, "Geeze, it's too small back here for my legs." 

"Chronic complainer, isn't he?" Blair teased Mey. 

"You don't know the half of it." Mey laughed at the look on Harps' face. 

"Don't start all ready, Mey." 

"Someone is grouchy. Not getting any?" Jim teased him now. 

"I'm getting plenty. Mey, tell them I'm getting plenty." 

The three men laughed their heads off. "What are you laughing about? I am getting plenty." 

Blair drove up to the highway and said, "Now which way do I turn again, Jim?" 

"Chief, you better be joking." 

"I am." 

"Good, I'd hate to stop now and have to beat your ass." 

"Now wait a minute, that sounds kind of fun in a kinky kind of way." Blair giggled. 

The four men teased each other for about an hour and then Blair turned on the radio and it was Willie Nelson singing, On The Road Again. Meyers and Blair were thrilled to have it on and began to sing. In the back seat, Jim whispered, "Oh for god's sake. Is there no mercy?" 

"There won't be any mercy on this trip, Jim." Harp teased. 

"Well, I'm just glad that I have him in my life, so I'll stop bitching." Jim said to a smiling Harp. 

Blair pulled onto the side of the road and leaned over the seat for a kiss. "Thank you, Jim. I love you, too." 

"Sing for us, babe." Jim said as he pushed him back into the front seat. 

The singing began again, but Jim smiled as they sang Santana's Smooth. Yes, life was going to be smooth now. They were all On The Road Again. 

The end. 

Acknowledgments: Thank you to Mary for the beta. This was Lisa's idea, so you can either hate her or love her. {g} Thanks, Lisa.


	5. Adjustments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are changing in a big way for Harper and Meyers. What do Jim and Blair think about the changes?

Adjustments - Patt   
~~~~~ 

 

~~~~~ 

Jim looked at the clock and growled. They had only slept for two hours. Who was bugging them now? They had another two hours before they had to get ready for work. Getting up, he slipped his jeans on to answer the door. Halfway down, he knew who it was and smiled. 

Opening up the door he growled, "What the hell are you doing? We're sleeping." 

"I couldn't stand it anymore, Jim. I had to tell you." Bill Meyers stood in Jim's doorway looking happier than he ever had. 

Thankfully, everyone loved Harper's better half and Jim stood aside to allow him in with his news. Jim pointed to the sofa, as if Mey didn't remember where it was. "So tell me, what is the big news?" 

"Go and get Sandburg. I have to tell him too." 

"If I didn't know any better, I would say you were pregnant." Jim smiled and then noticed the look on Mey's face and said, "You're pregnant?" Both men began to laugh and Jim said, "So who is?" 

"Go get Sandburg." Mey ordered. 

"I'm here. Geeze, try and sleep in this house. What's up, Mey? You look happy. You're glowing. Are you pregnant?" Blair snickered to himself. 

"We went to see the lawyer you guys advised us to see and we asked about adoption while we were there. Come to find out they need parents for older children and we filled out all of the paperwork. They called us two weeks ago and said they have a family for us but we had to buy a house. So that's where we've been for the last two weeks. We found one two days ago and it's great. It's a big old three story house." 

"So, you have to move?" A very shocked Jim asked quietly. 

"Well, yeah. In order to have a family, you have to move into a home." Mey explained. 

"Your loft was a wonderful home. I don't understand why they would make you move." Jim was unusually upset. 

"The loft was too small, Jim." Meyers explained. 

Blair had to cut Jim off at the pass, so he asked, "How big is the house and how many kids?" 

"The house has five bedrooms and there are three kids. They all know we're gay and they don't care. They had no one else. The oldest child is 13, then 11 and the youngest is 6. Their names are Nadine, Nicolas and Natalie. They're all so cute. Wait until you see them." 

"I have to take a shower." Jim growled as he left the room. 

"What did I do, Sandburg?" 

"Jim doesn't like to share. Unfortunately, that includes his friends with a new family." Blair explained. 

"He'll come around, right? Because Harp has fishing trips planned with Nic already. And he told him his friend Jim was going to teach him some things." Mey beamed as he talked. He was so friggin' happy. 

"Mey, I know how much you wanted to have children, so I'm so happy for you, but what about Harp? He never seemed that hot on the subject." 

"He didn't want to at all. But he filled the papers out for me and then we had the interview with the kids and he was in love. I kid you not, they're really nice kids." 

Blair grabbed Mey and hugged him and said, "I'm so happy. Come for dinner tonight." 

"I think we should let Jim get over the shock first." 

"No, come for dinner. I want to hear more about them." Blair pleaded. 

"Okay, but see if you can talk Jim into being nice by tonight." Both men laughed as Mey left. 

Jim came storming out of the bathroom and shouted, "Did both of you forget that I can hear you from any room?" 

Blair pushed Jim up against the stair railing and yelled back, "Fuck you, Ellison." 

Jim didn't even move. It scared him a little that Blair shoved him like that. Blair wasn't usually physical, unless they were in bed. This wasn't a good sort of physical. Jim slowly walked up the stairs, knowing he fucked up something else. 

Blair got his things and took a shower, ignoring the sad looks Jim was giving him. When he was all ready, he walked out and went through the door without as much as a fuck you or goodbye. Jim looked around and knew that he was in deep shit. Damn it. Why does he always win? And why do I always think it's a competition? Sighing, the large man walked out the door to start another day. 

"Hey, Ellison! Did you hear the news?" Harp asked as soon as he walked off of the elevator. 

"Well, I hope so. He woke us both up to tell us." Jim said negatively. 

"What is your fucking problem?" Harp growled. 

"I'm sick of hearing about everyone's private life. Could we get some work done?" Jim headed towards his desk. 

"Won't hear another fucking word from me. No way. I won't tell you about Nicolas, who is eleven years old and dying to meet his Uncle Jim. He wants to learn to fish in the worst way. But I'm not gonna tell ya." Harp walked into the break room and leaned up against the wall. He felt like he was going to fall apart. Jim was his best friend. He had hoped he would be happy for them. But he seemed none-too-happy at this moment. 

Blair walked into the room and shut the door. He pulled Harp into a firm but loving hug. "Don't mind him. He doesn't want to share you." 

The door was thrown open and it slammed up against the wall. "Sandburg, don't tell him that shit. It's not true. I just think they're stupid for adopting someone else’s children. They're too old. The problems are already there." 

"Thanks for your support, Jim." Harp walked out looking sadder than he ever had. 

"Way to go, dickhead." Blair stormed out and sat at his desk. He picked his phone up and dialed a number. Jim looked over to see what he was doing and Blair growled at him. Normally, this would have turned Jim on, but not today. 

"Hey, what are you up to? Do you happen to have a spare room? You do? Great. Okay, I'll see you after work. I'll be packed by then." Blair hung up the phone and continued to type. 

"It's not going to work, Sandburg. I'm not going to rush to your side and beg you to stay. So just forget it." Jim snarled. 

"I didn't want you to. We're done, Jim. I'll continue working with you, but that's as far as it goes." Blair knocked on Simon's door and said, "See you tomorrow, Simon." 

"Have a good night, Sandburg." Simon called out. Then he saw the sad look on Jim's face and knew that Jim had done something stupid once again. 

"Want to come in and talk about it?" Simon offered. 

"No thanks. I screwed up again and he left me." 

"What do you mean he left you?" 

"Just like it sounds. He's moving in with Harper and Meyers." Jim looked totally lost. 

"Grow up, Ellison. Go and get him." Simon ordered. 

"Excuse me, sir. I'm not the one that broke up with his lover in the middle of the bullpen. Everyone knows." Jim was torn between embarrassed and pissed off. 

"Decide what's important and do it. I'm tired of this shit, Jim." 

"Fuck you." Jim shouted and walked down the stairwell. 

"Not on your luckiest day." Simon yelled down the stairs. He could hear Jim laughing, but knew he would be going home to get Blair. 

When Jim arrived at the loft, he knew he was too late. Fuck... 

When Simon's phone rang, he didn't want to answer it. He just knew it was Jim. Looking down at the caller ID, he saw that he was right. No way. Just stay out of this. 

When the machine picked up, a pitiful sounding Jim asked, "Simon, do you know where Harp and Mey moved to? Call me when you get in. Bye." 

Simon sat down to read a book and tried to relax. The phone rang again and he picked it up. "What?" 

"Sorry, Simon. I was calling to add some to the last message. I'll call later." Jim got ready to hang up. 

"What do you want, Ellison?" 

"I want my life back. For crying out loud, I can't do the single life anymore. I'm worthless as a single male." Jim sounded so sad, but Simon couldn't help but laugh. "Are you laughing at me?" 

"Why yes, I am. Here is Harp's address, but don't go over there yet. Let him cool down a bit. And while he's cooling down, maybe you can decide why you forced him to leave." Simon suggested nicely. 

"Good idea, Simon. I'll do that. Thank you." Jim hung the phone up and decided he would make a list of things that he was happy about and sad about. Then Blair could help him work them out. 

He got a notebook out of the desk and started to write. 

I want us to have a house.   
I want us to have kids.   
I want us to smile like they did talking about those kids.   
I want us to make love again.   
I want you to not be angry at me all the time.   
I need you.   
I want you.   
I love you.   
Do you love me?   
Do you still want me?   
Do I still make you warm for my form?   
Would you like to buy a house?   
Would you like to have kids?   
Would you smile for me, like they were smiling today?   
Would you make love to me again?   
Would you stop being angry and love me?   
Would you need me?   
Would you love me? 

Jim looked at the list and figured he was on the right track. He knew that he was jealous of Harp and Mey and he felt like shit. As he should. 

At Harper and Meyers new house: 

"So what do you think of the new house, Sandburg?" Mey asked. 

"I love it. It's perfect in every way. I love the idea of having five bedrooms and three bathrooms. Very cool. I bet the kids love it." 

"I know I do, Uncle Blair." Nadine said softly. She was 13, but a little shy. 

"Who picked your furniture out? I love every single room." Blair said happily. 

"Mey picked out mine and Harp picked out Nic and Natalie's." Nadine said. 

"Uncle Blair?" Nic called out. 

"Yes, Nic. What can I do ya for?" Blair answered. 

"Will your hair be just like Mey's when you get old?" 

Blair burst out laughing and said, "Honey, his hair is white blond, not gray. And he's six months younger than me." 

"Cool. I like that. Will my hair be like yours, Mey?" 

"I don't think so. Yours is dark brown, mine is white blond. You do the coloring." Everyone in the room started to laugh. 

Natalie went and sat on Blair's lap. "Will you take us fishing some day? Harp says you and Uncle Jim fish good." 

"How old are you, Natalie?" Blair asked smiling. 

"I'm six. Six and a half. I'm short, but I'm really smart." 

All the men started to laugh and Harp picked her up from Blair's lap and said, "I need some loving." 

Blair watched as the kids crawled all over both men and kissed and hugged them until they were exhausted. The picture before him made him very sad. He had wanted kids so bad. Every time he brought it up, Jim wouldn't discuss it. Now it looked like he would have a chance with someone else. 

"Uncle Blair? Can we go fishing this weekend? Can we?" Nic said as he crawled onto Blair's lap. 

"I don't see why not. That sounds good to me." Blair hugged him and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. 

"Uncle Blair, where is Uncle Jim? And why are you so sad?" 

"Because his boyfriend is a jerk." Jim said from the doorway. 

All three of the kids went and stood before Jim and asked, "Are you Uncle Jim?" 

"I am. And I won't be doing this ever again. If he forgives me I want to be in your lives. Harper and Meyers, I'm truly sorry." 

Harp gave Jim a huge hug and said, "Go make up with him. He's sad." 

Jim pulled Blair into his arms and said, "Would you like to marry me?" 

"Yes." Blair said softly. 

"Would you like to buy a house? A big house?" Jim asked. 

"I would love to." 

"Would you like to be put on that waiting list for adoption?" 

"More than anything, Jim." 

"Do you think you could still love me?" Jim asked sadly. 

"You are such a dumb butt. I love you. I will always love you. Do you understand?" Blair pulled him down for a kiss. "Now go and talk with the boys. First of all, I want you to ask them to go fishing this weekend. The kids have never been fishing." 

"I love you, Blair. I'm sorry I was an ass. I'll go and invite them now." 

Blair watched his man walk away and felt himself getting hard. Shit... but he has a fantastic ass. 

Jim walked up to the two new daddies and asked, "Who would like to go fishing this weekend?" 

"I would." Nic answered quickly. 

"I would." Natalie followed suit. 

"I guess I could." Nadine answered and smiled sweetly at Jim. 

Harp leaned into Jim and said, "She thinks you're very cute." 

Jim blushed and looked around for Blair. 

"I'm here, big man. Don't you worry. So what day are we going?" 

"Mey has to work on Saturday, so could we do it on Sunday?" Harp inquired. 

"Sounds good to me. We need to get them set up for fishing. How about we go tomorrow night?" Jim asked Harp. 

"Sounds okay to me. Did I hear you say you might sell the loft?" Mey asked. 

"Yup. I'm getting married and we're going to have a family. We need one. Well, okay, I need one. And I need Blair. So we're doing it together." Jim knew he was rambling. 

Jim and Blair stayed and visited with the new family and finally left at 10:00 o'clock. They each drove their vehicles home and parked and walked up to the loft. 

"You're okay with selling this?" Blair asked as he started taking his clothing off. 

"Yeah, I'm fine with it. I want a family, babe. I want us to have more room. I want you... right now." Jim ordered in a very husky voice. 

"You got it, big man." Blair stripped as he ran up the stairs. Jim enjoyed the view following behind him. Now this is what Jim had in mind for tonight. 

Blair was wonderful. Jim had to keep reminding himself not to fuck this up. 

_And hot damn, we're uncles now. Life is good._

The End.


	6. Life Starts Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are adjustments for BLair and Jim, but they aren't complaining one damn bit.

Adjustments 2: Life Starts Here   
by Patt

 

Two weeks after Jim had come to terms with everything, he and Blair were looking for a house. 

"Jim, Thanksgiving is coming up and Harp and Mey asked us to come for dinner. What do you think?" 

"I think that would be very nice." Jim smiled over at his love. 

"Cool." Blair got things ready to go to see another house. "I hope this is the house. I'm tired of looking at them. Are you?" 

"I sure am. I can't wait to find our home. Maybe today will be our lucky day. You never know." Jim tried to soothe his lover's soul. 

When they met the agent in front of a very old house, they questioned her sanity. It looked very, very old. "Jim, let's have a look first. Please?" For some reason Blair loved the house. He didn't know why. 

"Sure. You know I would do anything for you." Jim smiled at Blair and then said to the agent, "We'll have a look around." 

"It's a great price because it needs a lot of work. I hope you like it. Why don't I leave you both alone to look at it? I'll be doing paperwork in my car." Sue said. 

"Thanks, Sue. You're a doll." Jim said and as soon as Sue turned and left, Blair reached over and pinched his nipple. 

"Fuck, that hurt." 

"Wuss. Knock it off, Ellison." 

"I did nothing. I've been accused of something I didn't do." Jim snickered. 

"Stop flirting with women. I mean it." 

Jim realized his love was very serious. "I'm sorry. I was teasing you, but I won't from now on." 

"Let's see this house." Both men walked up hand in hand making Sue smile from her car. She thought they were the cutest couple she had ever met. And that Blair was very possessive. 

They walked in and saw the huge entryway with wood like they had never seen before. "Man, this is beautiful." 

"No lie. It's really old, however, it looks like it's been taken care of. This house is full of character," Jim added. 

"Jim, look at all of this gorgeous antique furniture. Do you think they would sell it with the house?" 

"Maybe. We could ask. But let's see the rest of the house first. I hope it's got more than one bathroom." Jim whined. 

"I brought my handy-dandy paper here that gives us all of that information. It has three bathrooms. One on this main floor and two upstairs. Geeze, it's got four or more bedrooms. And they look really big." 

"Look at this living room. I love it. Let's put in an offer right away." Jim said almost in a Blair bounce mode. 

"Slow down. We need to see the entire thing and see what needs to be fixed first. Then we'll make plans." 

"That fireplace screamed your name as I walked by." Jim teased. 

"All the more reason not to buy it, you nut." 

They went through the huge formal dining room, then went into the kitchen and found themselves totally in love. There were cupboards everywhere and tons of countertops. Just the way Jim would want a kitchen to look. 

"Chief, this is a beautiful kitchen. I've never seen one this great. I love it." 

"It says there is a master bedroom on this floor. Where is it?" Blair looked around and then just followed Jim. Jim led him right to a door and opened it. Inside was the most breathtaking looking room they had ever seen. 

"Chief, we're getting this bed." 

"Jim, we're getting this house." 

"Oh goody." 

"But I still want to see the entire thing." Blair led the way out of the bedroom before he jumped Jim and embarrassed them both. 

"Chief, you missed the closets. Look at how big they are." 

"I'm going upstairs. See you up there." Blair started running, but found himself easily caught. 

"Have I mentioned lately how much I love you?" Jim kissed him softly. 

"No, so now was a good time. Jim, look how nice these bedrooms are. And all of the bathrooms have those claw feet tubs. I love those. Do you?" 

"Yeah, they have enough room for my legs. What do you suppose is up here?" Jim pulled the door open and walked up the narrow staircase. Once he reached the top, he called down, "It's a dormer. It's great." 

"It has a garage outside and it has a basement with the washer and dryer already here. And it says the furniture can be bought for the right price." 

"Slow down a minute. Who's going to help me clean this place?" Jim teased. 

"I know. We can become foster parents and make them do it." Blair laughed as Jim cuffed the back of his head. 

"That was sick, even for you. Seriously, Chief. Can we keep this up working our schedule?" 

"I think so. Just don't mess it to begin with." 

"Yeah, right. Like I'm the one that messes." 

Blair just smiled over at him and let his lover win for a change. "So what do you think, Jim?" 

"We need to get Sue in here and have her tell us what repairs there are, because I've been looking and I didn't see one problem." Jim said. 

Blair went called Sue on her cell phone and she joined the boys inside. "What do you think?" 

"We both love it. But you said it needs work. What's wrong with it?" Jim asked. 

"Nothing, I just wanted to see if you were paying attention. The couple is having a hard time selling it, because it's so large. But you mentioned you might have children some day. I figured this would be perfect." 

"Chief, even if we didn't have kids, this is a perfect Nephew and Niece house. They would love it here." Jim was very excited. 

"Jim, do you have your heart set on the dormer?" 

"I have it all planned already. What else do we need to do, Sue?" Jim wanted this house bad. 

Sue did all of the paperwork with them, and got it all set up loan qualifications letter. "I'll call you as soon as possible. He has to accept the offer first." 

"Just offer him what he wants." Jim said quietly. 

"Jim, you love the house that much?" Blair asked. 

"There's something about it that's drawing me into it and I want to live and love here." Jim smiled over at his mate. 

"Hang on and I'll call him with your offer." Sue went into their beautiful kitchen and talked to the owner. She walked back out smiling and said, "It's yours." 

"Holey Moley, Batman." Blair jumped up, wrapping his legs around Jim's waist. 

"Jumping Jimminey, Robin, you're heavy." Jim laughed at the look on Blair's face. 

"I asked him about the furniture and since you gave him such a fair offer, he's including it in the sale. He told me to give you the keys now." She handed the keys over to both of the men and they were beaming with happiness. 

"Sue, can we call our friends over to see our new house?" Blair asked. 

"Of course. You have the keys. We'll close in about 14 days, but go ahead and move in." Sue hugged both men and left happier than she'd ever been. "Wait, do you need a ride?" 

"We'll ask our friends to bring Jim's SUV." Blair said. 

"Thanks, again, Sue." Jim called out and almost slammed the door on her. Blair was having a hard time keeping from laughing. 

Blair dialed a number and heard, "Harper." 

"Hey, Harp. Wanna come and see our new house? Make sure and bring the kids. And could you stop by the loft and pick up the SUV?" 

"If I didn't know better, I would say you like them more than us." Jim was listening and could hear the grin in his voice. 

Jim and Blair tried to sit still while they waited for their friends. It wasn't working, so Blair got on Jim's lap and they began to make-out. 

"Chief, they're here." 

"Oh goody. Now we both have boners." Blair growled. 

Blair opened the door and Harp said, "Holy crap, Blair. This is huge." 

"Hey, kids. Come on in. Uncle Jim will order us a pizza. We have plates and everything." Blair said as he hugged each of the kids. 

"Harp, do you get the feeling we don't exist any longer?" Mey began to laugh when the kids looked puzzled. 

"Mey, we love you." Nadine said softly. 

"As we do you, sugar. We were just teasing Blair. He's so fun to tease." Mey said smiling. 

Blair gave everyone a tour of the house and the kids were telling Uncle Jim which room would be their's when they stayed over. It turned out to be a wonderful day and night. Mey and Harp took the sleepy kids home at 9:30 and Jim retired to the new bedroom with Blair. 

"Are you sure you want to sleep here?" Blair asked. 

"Sure. It's a great house. It's a great bed. We have pizza leftover for breakfast and we have some cokes left. We're set, babe." Jim pulled Blair into his arms and they snuggled. 

"Jim, do you think we'll ever get a baby?" 

"First of all, we asked for any age. So chances are we might get an older child instead. They're harder to place." 

"I love you so much, man." And they were off like rockets. They broke the bed in nicely and then slept like logs all night long. 

@@@@@

In the morning, Jim was staring at his love when Blair said, "All right, what's up, besides you?" 

"I wanted to tell you that the dormer is going to be your new office. Remember how you said you wanted to write a few books? Well, now you'll have your own room. We can pick out some great furniture at the antique store we like so much. Is that all right with you?" 

"More than all right. Man, you are an angel. Thank you." And they were off again. 

@@@@@

Two weeks later, they signed the papers on the house and moved everything in. Rafe bought the Loft. So the boys would still get to see it now and then. This made Jim smile a lot. 

The day before Thanksgiving morning, the phone rang and Jim answered, grumpily, "Ellison." 

"Mr. Ellison, this is Mrs. Hayes from the State. I hate to bother you on a holiday, but we have two children here that have no homes to go to for the holiday. Would you consider being a foster parent for now?" 

"Could you tell me more about them?" 

"Jesse is ten months old. His parents were both killed in a car accident, two months ago. His parents were orphans, so there are no family members to find. But he should be easier to place, since he is still a baby. Then Hannah is six, going on 30. She's a darling child, but very sad. Her parents just deserted her. What do you think? Maybe for this month and next, so they won't be alone over the holidays?" 

"Can I talk to Blair really fast?" 

"Sure, I'll hold." She already knew they wanted children badly and would take them in any way, shape or form. 

Jim talked to Blair and Blair picked up the phone and said, "Mrs. Hayes? When can we pick them up?" 

"I can bring them out now."She said with a smile in her voice. 

"How soon?" Blair asked. 

"Give me the new address and they'll be there in an hour. Calm down, they are only children after all. Happy Thanksgiving, Blair. Tell Jim I said that to him, also. Bye." 

Blair put the phone down and went into Jim's arm and began to shake. 

"Chief, what's wrong?" 

"Scared is all. Not to worry. I'll get over it soon." 

"I'll hold you as long as you need, Chief." 

"Isn't it weird that one of the bedrooms upstairs has a bedroom all set up for a baby? That's past handy, eh?" Blair laughed. 

"We need to move our room upstairs so we can hear the kids." 

"Jim, you're a friggin' Sentinel. I think we're safe." 

"But he's only ten months old. He's just a baby." 

"We'll think about it in a while. I bought some things for the rooms in case we ever got any children. Do you mind if I desert you and fix up the second bedroom for Hannah?" 

"Go... Do your thing, babe." Jim smiled after Blair's retreating form. "In fact, can I help?" 

"Yeah, that would be nice." 

The boys worked in silence, smiling at each other and finished the room quickly. "Do you think Hannah will like this room?" Blair asked. 

"She'd be nuts not to. You did a really great job, Chief." The room was in soft pastels, but not too girlie. It was balloons rising up to blue, blue skies. Anyone that came in the room would feel good immediately. 

"Thanks. I've been really excited. I went shopping two or three times with Harp's kids. They told me what kids like and don't like." 

Both men stepped back and looked over the room appraisingly. They had indeed done a fine job. 

As they walked down the stairs, the doorbell rang and Blair jumped two inches off the stair he was on. 

"Calm down, Chief. They're just kids." 

They answered the door together wearing large smiles. "Hello, Mrs. Hayes, come on in." Jim stepped aside to allow all of them in. 

"The house is fantastic, Jim. It looks just beautiful. Hannah Jones, this is Jim Ellison and his life-mate Blair Sandburg." 

She held her small hand out and said, "It's very nice to meet you. Thank you for letting us stay until they find us a new home. The last place was icky." 

"Well, you won't find Icky here. Not to worry." Jim smiled fondly at the child. 

"Gentlemen, this is Jesse Jameson. He is ten months old, but walks and does his share of talking too. He's going to keep you boys on your toes." She smiled at the way they were looking at the baby. 

"Can I hold him?" Blair asked. 

"Of course." She handed Jesse over to Blair and saw the instant chemistry. 

"Oh man. Jim, look how cute he is." Blair looked over at Jim with the eyes. The ones that would be able to get him this child. 

"Is there any chance of having them stay longer than two months?" Jim asked. 

"Well, we have a family for Jesse in January. But maybe Hannah could stay for a while." Mrs. Hayes explained. 

"You couldn't tell them that something came up? We'd really like a chance at these kids." Blair was almost begging. 

Jim was suddenly upset watching Hannah. "Hannah, would you like to stay with us forever?" 

"I would love to. Can Jesse come too?" the little one asked. 

"We'll have to see what Mrs. Hayes says first. What do you say?" 

They all looked at Mrs. Hayes and she said, "Talk about pressure. We'll do up the paperwork and if all goes well, in six months they will be yours." 

"What does that mean?" Hannah asked Jim. 

"It means you belong to us." She jumped into his arms and held on tight. "I want to belong to you guys. Thank you." 

"Jim, would you like to hold your son?" Blair asked smiling. 

"I sure would, if Miss Hannah would let go of me and run to her other Daddy." 

She did just that. They exchanged kids and laughed and talked with Mrs. Hayes. 

After she left, Blair said, "Would you like to see your new room?" 

"Oh yes." 

They all went upstairs and she ooh'd and aah'd over everything. "Blair, I love this room. Is it by Jesse's room? He gets scared sometimes." 

"You be a kid. We'll take care of Jesse during the night, all right? During the day you can help us." Jim said calmly. 

Blair held Hannah for a while and asked, "Miss Hannah, we're invited to our friends' house for dinner on Thanksgiving. How do you feel about that?" 

"Do they have kids?" 

"They have three." Blair answered already knowing what the outcome would be. 

"Yay. We already have cousins?" Hannah asked. 

"You sure do. There is Natalie who is 6, Nadine who is 13 and Nicolas who is 11. They're great kids. You're going to love them." Blair knew this to be true. 

"I'm going to give Jesse a bath before bedtime. See you all later." Jim held Jesse in the air and made goofy noises at him as they climbed the stairs. 

"Blair, do you think you could like me?" 

"Honey, I already like you. Why are you asking that?" 

"People always like babies first." Hannah said sadly. 

Jim held a naked Jesse in his arms and he said, "Miss Hannah, could you show me how to do this?" 

"Sure, Jim. Come on, Blair, and I'll show you too." She was thrilled to be in charge. 

Blair winked at his partner and knew Jim had been listening. 

Things were going to be all right. They were a family. Life starts here. 

The End.


	7. More Adjustments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is life like for Jim and Blair with kids and how about Harper and Meyers with kids?

More Adjustments  
By Patt

Sequel to What Were You Thinking?,What Now , Needing Sandburg Part 1 and 2, On The Road Again, Adjustments 1, Adjustments 2: Life Starts Here 

My Moonridge winner, Pam asked for a sequel to the Harper Series. So that is what she is getting. I hope you enjoy it, Pam. 

Word Count: 8,814

Simon stood at the doorway of his office and didn’t know how he was going to do this, but he knew there was no getting around it. “Harper, would you please come into my office,” Simon called out. 

Harper looked at Jim and Blair immediately to see if they knew something. They both shrugged their shoulders and smiled. Harper went walking into Simon’s office like he had been read a death sentence or something. 

“Sir?” Harper said, standing very tall and straight. 

“Relax, Harper. Sit down, I need to talk to you,” Simon said as he closed the office door for privacy. 

“You’re going to have a new partner for the next three weeks. His name is Zack Carson, do you know him?” Simon inquired. 

“Yes, I know him. I don’t want to be partnered with him, if you don’t mind,” Harper answered as calmly as he could. 

“Well, I do mind. He’s a good cop, he volunteered for the job and we need someone that knows more about these murders from that precinct. Why do you have something against Carson?” Simon asked. 

“He tried his hardest to break me and Meyers up years ago. I don’t want to deal with that shit on top of a case. Do you understand? I could work with Blair and Jim could work with him, how does that sound?” Harper suggested. 

“I could be swayed to go that way, I guess. Jim’s not going to like it. He’s always with Sandburg,” Simon warned. 

“Well, he needs a change. This way he can work with the so called helper and get to the bottom of things,” Harper said. 

“Ellison, Sandburg, my office, now,” Simon barked. 

“Oh shit…” Jim said as he got up to go to Simon’s office. Blair followed him not saying a word. He wasn’t going to panic until it was time. He could tell by Simon’s voice that they weren’t going to like it. 

They walked in and Simon said, “Sit.”

“I’d rather stand sir. I know you’re going to give us a shit assignment. What is it?” Jim asked. 

“You know those mob hits that have been happening around town? Well, you’re going to be working with a cop that deals with the murder case from that precinct. I know it’s not your idea of a good time, but there is no choice. We have this man coming and you’re going to be working with him.”

Jim smiled and said, “That wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be,” Jim stated. 

Simon looked over at Harper and smiled and said, “I’m not done yet.”

“Oh shit, I should have known. What do I have to do?” Jim asked. 

“You’re going to be working with Zack Carson, but Blair is going to be working with Harper here. They’re going to be your back up. I need you on this Jim, so don’t fight me on it,” Simon stated. 

“That’s still not too bad, what’s wrong with him?” Jim wondered. 

“He’s an asshole,” Harper answered. 

“Why?” Blair asked. 

“He likes to break up couples, so don’t be surprised if he tries to break you two up,” Harper said as calmly as he could. 

“Oh great, a fucking drama queen is just what we need with the kids and all. Simon, is there any way out of this?” Blair asked. 

“No, Sandburg there is no way out of this. I’m sorry, but the order has been set,” Simon remarked quickly. 

Jim smiled at Blair and said, “Chief, you have nothing to worry about. I don’t want anyone but you.”

“Did you forget you’re still in my office?” Simon wondered. 

“Sorry, Simon. Sometimes I forget you’re our boss. Sometimes I just think of you as the friend. Sorry,” Jim apologized. 

“Speaking of the kids, how are all of your kids?” Simon asked while he had them all in there.

Harper said, “Nadine, Nicolas and Natalie are all doing really well in school and they don’t mind going to the day care until we pick them up at night. Nicolas feels like we’re babying him, but I don’t think 11 is old enough to stay at the house by yourself and your 13 year old sister. Do you?” 

“No, I agree with your judgment call. They’ll get used to it and bounce back soon. I’m glad they’re doing well. Jim and Blair, are Jesse and Hannah doing well too?”

“Yeah, they’re doing great. They all go to the same day care, so they watch out for each other. It’s really cute. They call each other cousins. We couldn’t ask for better kids. Jesse doesn’t call anybody anything yet. He’s just starting to talk now,” Blair said. 

“So when do you legally get them?” Simon asked. 

“Three more months, so it’s been nerve wracking. We keep expecting someone from their families to show up and take them away. Do you do that too, Harp?” Jim asked. 

“Oh yeah, we do it all the time. But soon they’ll be all ours. We’ll have to have a huge party for the event when the time comes,” Harper said. 

“Okay, listen, I hate to cut this off, but Carson just walked in. I’m going to call him in here for a sit down, Jim. You might as well stay in here,” Simon suggested. 

“Okay, see you later, Harper. See you at lunch, Chief,” Jim said as he sat down and waited for the jerk to join the meeting. 

Blair walked out and did a double take. The guy was super good looking and that pissed him off right away. Why hadn’t Harper mentioned that? He was gorgeous and Blair was instantly worried. He sat at his desk and frowned as the man walked by. 

Carson stopped in front of Harper’s desk and said, “Chicken shit.”

Blair just stared at Harper and waited for the man to go into Simon’s office. He walked in and shook hands with Simon and then Jim stood up and said, “Hi, I’m going to be your partner. My name is Jim Ellison.”

“I know who you are. I can’t believe they let you get rid of the little yapper for the next three weeks,” Carson said. 

“Oh I just know you didn’t call my partner a yapper,” Jim shouted. 

“Yeah, he always reminds us of one of those yapping dogs that drive you nutso. I don’t know how you work with him,” Carson said calmly. 

“Fuck you,” Jim shouted again. 

“Gentlemen, this has to work out in order to solve this case. It’s important that we find this killer before he kills more people. Last night he got a family of five. We can’t even find any mob connections, but we know it’s the same man, using a execution style hit,” Simon assumed. 

“Tell him to keep his opinions to himself about Sandburg, or this is off. I don’t have to work with him,” Jim said angrily. 

“I always heard you were a stand up guy, I never heard that you were a quitter. Funny, how some things you never hear that you should,” Carson said. 

“I’m not a quitter, you can ask anyone, but I don’t have to put up with your shit,” Jim said evenly trying to control his breathing. He needed to calm down somewhat. 

“Good, then let’s get to work,” Carson said. 

“Here are all of the files that you’ll need to get started on. We have the conference room set up for the two of you, so start whenever you feel comfortable,” Simon ordered. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Blair said, “Why was Jim so pissed off? Do you know this guy, Harp?”

“Yeah, I know him, he’s a dick head.”

“Why in the world would you want Jim partnered with him then?” Blair asked. 

“He and I don’t get along, so I knew it wouldn’t work, plus Meyers would have beaten the shit out of him first,” Harper explained. 

“Oh fuck, he’s going to go after Jim isn’t he? And he’s gorgeous,” Blair said somewhat insecurely. 

“Blair you have nothing to worry about. He’s an asshole. No one likes him, that’s why they had to find a partner for him elsewhere. No one will work with him. I think Jim will probably kick him in the nuts on the second day. Maybe the first,” Harper guessed. 

I still don’t like it at all. I’m going to talk to Meyers about this when I get home tonight and we’ll have a bitching session,” Blair teased. 

Jim and Carson came walking out and Jim said to everyone, “I’ll be in the conference room if you need me for any little thing that comes up.”

Carson started to laugh and walked towards the conference room. Jim leaned over the desk and said, “Take it easy, I hate his guts.”

Blair laughed and wanted to kiss him in the worst way. He was so grateful.

Jim said, “I might be having lunch with him, so do you mind going with someone else?” 

“I might get caught up on things here and eat a sandwich. Then I’ll be close by if you need me,” Blair offered. 

“Blair, the only thing I’ll need from you is to be a witness when I kill him, then you can say it was self-defense,” Jim said as he walked off angrily. 

“I told you, you wouldn’t have anything to worry about,” Harper said with a smile on his face. 

“Oh shut up,” Blair snapped and went back to catching up with his files. 

!!!!!!!!!!

As soon as Jim walked into the conference room Carson asked, “Did you have to stop by and check things out with the little woman first?”

“Why are you trying so hard for me to punch your lights out? The case will be over and no one will want to work with you. Just explain to me, what the deal is,” Jim asked in all honesty. 

“I was just kidding, God, everyone is so serious here. Let’s get down to work and forget about the women in our lives,” Carson said snickering at his own little joke. 

“I find it hard to believe that you’re with anyone,” Jim said honestly. 

“He tells me I’m really good in the sack. But he might be lying, who knows. Do you know him really well?” Carson asked. 

“Know who?” Jim wondered. 

“Kelly Harper,” Carson said smiling. 

“I know Harper isn’t with you. I know that much. He spends all of his time with his family, so I don’t have time to listen to this bullshit,” Jim commented. 

“Ask him about last month. I dare you to ask him. I know he’ll lie anyhow, but he was with me. He doesn’t wander that often, but he always comes back to me,” Carson said sounding very truthful. 

Jim was instantly pissed off. Poor Meyers, believed that he was the only one and here Harper was fucking someone else. Jim was going to tell Blair and see if he wanted to tell Meyers. In the mean time, he was going to ask Harper. 

“I’ll be back after lunch,” Jim said standing up to leave. 

“Can you bring me back a sandwich? I want to get started on this case,” Carson replied. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Jim said as he left the room. He could have cared less about bringing him back a sandwich, but knew he probably would bring him one. 

Jim walked by Harper’s desk and said, “You’re with me.”

Blair said, “What about me?”

“Stay put, I need to talk to Harper,” Jim said angrily, upsetting Blair. 

Harper followed Jim into the elevator and as soon as it shut, Jim asked, “Did you ever sleep with that sack of shit in the conference room? I mean, even if it was a blow job. Did you ever spend time with him sexually? I want the truth, don’t even bother denying it if it’s true,” Jim spat out. 

“I knew he would tell you that shit. He told Meyers the same thing three years ago, before I met you guys. I never slept with him. He’s fruit loops. I never wanted to sleep with him. He’s saying I did, right?” Harper asked. 

“Yes, he said that you always come back to him in the long run. He’s one sick son-of-a-bitch. Why is he saying that about you?” Jim wondered. 

“I don’t know, but don’t be nice to him at all. He’ll think you like him and then he starts the rumor mill going full time,” Harper warned. 

“Did you tell Simon he was a fruit basket?” Jim asked. 

“I told him that he tried to break me and Meyers up but I think Simon thinks I whine enough as it is. I’m just glad he’s going to be focusing on your for the next few weeks,” Harper said trying to make light of it. 

“Let’s go get some sandwiches and we’ll get back to work,” Jim decided. 

“Sounds good to me,” Harper answered. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Jim did end up getting a sandwich for Carson. He thought he would be nice to the man and hope for the best. He was a jerk and it was hard working with jerks. 

Jim stopped by Blair’s desk and handed him a sandwich and a tea and then walked into the conference room. “Here you go. One ham and cheese sandwich with a Dr. Pepper. That’s what I got, so I just ordered two of them.”

“Hey thanks, I’m starving. That was really nice of you because I know you don’t like me much,” Carson said. 

“Carson, we have to work together, so let’s just make the best of it, what do you say?” Jim asked. 

“I say let’s eat lunch and go over this paperwork and see if we can find a similarity in the cases,” Carson answered. 

They sat and ate their lunch in silence as they read the files in front of them. Jim finally said, “Why is someone killing families like mob hits? It makes no sense. If he was just a serial killer wouldn’t it appear a little different to us?” 

“And these families don’t have anything in common that we can find. They are nice families as far as we know. They don’t have a lot of money, but yet they do well enough. The men don’t work the same type of jobs. The wives don’t belong to anything that the other one does, so that’s a dead end too. The kids all went to different schools. A few of them went to private schools, but not the same ones.” Carson said. 

“So we need to find out some added things. Like did they all have a security system? Does it say?” Jim asked. 

“It doesn’t say. All it says is no forced entry, but nothing about a security system. Do you think that might be the thing that ties them all together?” Carson inquired. 

“Well, at least it’s somewhere to start. Let’s go check out the crime scenes and see first hand if they had systems or not. This guy left nothing. We know he was wearing gloves because there are no prints. He picks up the shell casings after he uses the gun on them and leaves nothing for us to tie him in to anything. This fucker is super cautious, but yet, somewhat casual about killing an entire family. Why would he kill kids? I don’t get it, do you? We need a lot more answers,” Jim advised. 

“Okay, partner, this might bring us a little closer to the killer if we look at the crime scenes,” Carson said hopefully. 

The two of them left for the day to check out the crime scenes and see if there was any connection. They really hoped that this might be the leg up they needed to help solve the case. 

!!!!!!!!!!

“Where is Jim?” Blair asked no one in particular. 

“He left for the day,” Connor said helpfully. 

“What do you mean he left for the day? He didn’t even tell me he was leaving. What’s up with that?” Blair inquired. 

“Sandy, he doesn’t have to tell you where he’s going when he’s working on a case. You’re not his mom, remember?” Connor teased. 

“It just pisses me off that he left me here with no vehicle to get home in,” Blair said. 

“Get a grip, Sandburg, you can ride with me,” Harper said. 

“Thanks, I think,” Blair answered with a smile on his face once again. 

“Come on, let’s blow this pop stand,” Harper said standing up, stretching his full 6’ 6” body. 

Connor looked at him oddly and said, “What does blow this pop stand mean? It sounds nasty.”

Both Harper and Blair burst out laughing. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Jim and Carson were checking out all of the crime scenes and were having some luck. The first two both had security systems and they were the same company. If any of the rest did, then it would help them discover who the killer was. They checked everything while they were at each house and made a list to keep track of things. Jim was keeping his and Carson had one going too. They figured they could watch each other’s back that way. They were going to figure this out if it killed them. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Harper took Blair to the Ellison-Sandburg home, so that he could get his SUV and pick up the kids at day care. “Thanks for the ride, Harp. What are you making for dinner? I figured maybe we could stop by your house and have pizza or something with all of you. What do you say?”

“Hey, Blair, that would be good. Pizza always sounds good to us. So grab the kids and come right over here. I’m going to pick ours up too, so I’ll see you there,” Harper stated. 

Blair got into the SUV happily and started it. Thankfully, he had his keys with him at all times, in case of an emergency. He was still a little pissed off that Jim didn’t tell him he was leaving, let alone how long he would be gone tonight. For all Blair knew, Jim was going to work all night. The thought of that, scared Blair somewhat. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Jim. He didn’t trust the jerk he was with. “Oh stop worrying yourself sick, dude. Just go and pick the kids up.” Blair loved talking to himself. He did it a lot these days. 

He went to the day care and picked up Hannah and Jesse and was thrilled to see them. They were so damn cute. He was instantly in a better mood. 

Blair was getting them seat belted in when he saw Harper drive up to pick up their kids. Blair loved seeing Harper as a dad. He never thought he would see the day it would happen, so it always made him smile. Harper was as happy with his children and Jim and Blair were with theirs. Blair got the SUV started and headed over to Meyers and Harpers house. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Harper went inside and saw the kids ready to go and smiled. Actually, he was beginning to think that Nadine and Nicolas were too old for day care, but he was afraid to have them home all alone after school. So he was going to have to think of something else to keep them safe, but make them feel less like babies. 

Nadine walked up and hugged Harper and said, “We are so ready to go home.”

Nicolas said, “What she said.”

Natalie smiled and jumped into Harpers arms and said, “How was your day, daddy?” 

“I had a great day, Natalie. Did you have a good day too?”

“I did. Nicolas got yelled at for pushing a boy that smacked me. Didn’t the teacher tell you?” Natalie tattled. 

“It’s good that you stuck up for your sister, but you need to let the teacher handle it from now on, okay?” Harper asked him. 

“Yeah, I heard what she said to me. I was just angry that a big kid was picking on little Natalie. I’m glad we come to this place so we can watch out for her,” Nicolas said. “Sorry, dad.”

Harper was still thrilled that they called him daddy or dad, and Meyers was poppy or pop. He thought it was as cute as the kids were. They were a blessing to he and Meyers that was for sure. 

He got everyone out to the SUV and had them buckle up and they were on the way home. 

“Blair and the kids are going to stay at our house for pizza tonight. Does that sound good to anyone?” Harper asked. 

“I know it sounds good to you, dad, but it’s not good for you,” Nadine said, sounding very grown up. 

“I know, but it was Blair’s idea, I didn’t want to rain on his parade,” Harper said almost laughing at dodging this. 

“We’re going to see a parade?” Natalie asked, smiling happily. 

“No, honey, that’s just a saying. I just meant, I didn’t want to disappoint Uncle Blair by telling him we wouldn’t have pizza.”

Nadine said, “In that case, I guess one night won’t hurt. Pop makes a wonderful dinner for us almost all of the other nights, so it’s not like we’ll get sick from one pizza. Right?”

“Right.” Harper pulled into the driveway and parked his SUV and said, “Everybody get their homework and their jackets out of the SUV. Come on, let’s get in the house.”

“Oh look, Uncle Blair is already here,” Natalie said, pointing to Blair’s SUV. 

“Yes, he and the kids are here already,” Harper explained again. 

“Where is Uncle Jim,” Nicolas asked. 

“He had to work and might be working very late, so let’s get in there and show him a good time tonight, so he won’t miss Uncle Jim too much,” Harper said as he locked up the SUV. 

They all walked to the front door cheerfully expecting to see Blair and the kids. They weren’t disappointed. Hannah opened the front door and said, “Yay, you’re here.”

“Can we go play, daddy?” Natalie asked. 

“Sure. Be good you two,” Harper called out as he walked in and saw Blair talking to Meyers. They both looked super serious. Harper walked in and kissed Meyers and then pretended he was going to kiss Blair. 

They all laughed including the older kids. Nadine walked up to Blair and said, “Uncle Blair, can I please hold Jesse?”

Blair gladly let her have him and rested his tired arm. That kid was getting big and heavy. Nadine and Nicolas walked into the living room with Jesse and got the little basket of toys they had for him to play with. 

“Your kids are so great, Meyers and Harper. You’re doing a super job raising them. I don’t know when I’ve seen nicer children,” Blair confessed. 

“Thank you,” Harper replied and smiled over at Meyers. 

“I was just telling Blair that he had better watch out for Carson. He’s no fool and he’ll attack when Jim is least suspecting it. Am I right, Harp?”

“Yes, you’re right. He’s a menace. But I’m not worried about Jim at all. I am however worried about the life of one Zack Carson. He’s going to drive Jim to the edge and push him over,” Harper admitted. 

“He hasn’t even called yet and Blair is a little concerned,” Meyers pointed out. 

“Hey, it’s a case. When we work a case into the night, I don’t always call Meyers either. Even if I should. I know, I should. Jim knows too, but that doesn’t mean he will. It’ll make him appear weak to call you in front of Carson. So just keep that in mind, Blair.” Harper reminded him. 

“Okay, I’ll try not to get too pissed off, but I’m not promising anything. Mey ordered the pizza already and should be here in about ten minutes. Are you hungry Harper?” Blair asked. 

“I’m starving. I haven’t fed this stomach anything since lunch. Hey, I’m a tall dude. I need food,” Harper said laughing. 

When the pizza arrived everyone sat at the table and ate. Harper and Meyers even had a high chair for Jesse. It was so nice there. Blair loved being friends with them. They were always so thoughtful and the best of friends to Jim and Blair. 

Everyone talked, laughed and ate all of the pizza up. Nadine never told anyone how bad it was for them, not even once. 

When Blair left at 8:30, he knew he had to move his butt and get the kids ready for bed. And tonight would be harder because he was alone. This suddenly made Blair feel really sad. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Jim and Carson were on the fifth house and had found another similarity. They also had the same security system. But none of them had them on when the police arrived. Jim made a note to ask the detectives on the scene if they noticed any of them being turned on. It was weird. Why pay for a system and not use them? It was something that stuck out in Jim’s mind and he had to write all of that down. 

“Would you like to stop and get some dinner before we go back and look at the files once more?” Carson asked. 

Jim looked at his watch and said, “Oh shit. I need to get home. I have kids.”

“Well, I’m sure that Sandburg is capable of taking care of them one night. I’m just talking Subway or something,” Carson said. 

“Yeah, sure. I’m starving. That sandwich this afternoon didn’t stick with me too long,” Jim admitted. 

Carson got into Jim’s SUV and they drove to Quizno’s and Jim said, “I felt like a hot sandwich. Is that all right with you?”

“Yeah, that’s fine with me. Let’s get in and order. I’m starving,” Carson said. 

They ordered, got their drinks and chips and sat down and waited for their sandwiches to be finished. Jim could smell the food cooking and that just made him hungrier. He was glad that Carson talked him into stopping. Blair was capable of taking care of the kids one night out of the week. It wasn’t going to be bad at all. 

The guy brought their food over to them when they came out of the oven. Jim bit into his sandwich and said, “Oh my God, I’ve died and gone to heaven. This is the best meatball sandwich I’ve ever had.”

Carson laughed and smiled at Jim’s pleasure in eating the sandwich. He realized it took very little to make this man happy. Carson was thrilled with that. 

They talked about the case, quietly, and ate their dinner. Before long it was almost 11:00 at night. Jim couldn’t believe how fast the time had gone. Now he was feeling a little bit bad about deserting Blair with the kids. 

“I’ll take you back to the station to get your vehicle. Tomorrow it would probably work best if we each take our own,” Jim suggested. 

“Whatever you think is best, Jim.” 

On the drive over there, Jim said, “I’ve been wondering if someone had been fired from the security system lately and that’s why the codes weren’t on. If he worked recently for the company, he would know their safe words and their codes. Maybe it’s someone that was out to get someone that complained about him, causing him to be fired. What do you think of that idea?”

“I think it’s too fucking easy, is what I think. But we’ll check it out tomorrow, first thing. I would plan the entire day around that. We can find out if anyone has been fired and look them up in the computer and go and question them. It sure wouldn’t hurt anything,” Carson said agreeably. 

“Good, then that’s the game plan for tomorrow. We’ll spend all day doing that, and try to get out of the station by 6:00. I’d like to have dinner with my family,” Jim said firmly. 

“Jim, I hate to point this out, but family sometimes comes second when there is a serial killer on the loose. You might have to buck up and spend more time on the case,” Carson advised. 

“Carson, don’t tell me what to do. I’m old enough to know when I need to go to work and when I need to go home. Tomorrow, I need to be home by 6:00. That’s all there is to it. So stop making a big deal about it,” Jim snapped. 

“Sorry Ellison, I didn’t know that you didn’t work the same way as I did,” Carson said angrily. 

“First of all, you don’t have a family. So it shouldn’t make any difference with you. But it does with me. Now drop it, or I’ll pull out of this case so fast your head will spin,” Jim threatened. 

“You wouldn’t let go of this case now. You’ve gotten a taste for it. I’m safe. Okay, you win. We’ll stop work at 6:00 tomorrow. But I think this weekend, we should put in longer hours. What do you think?” Carson asked this time and didn’t tell him. 

“This weekend, would be fine,” Jim said as he pulled up to the station house. 

Before Jim knew what happened, Carson reached across and kissed Jim smack dab on the lips, sliding his tongue in and touching Jim’s tongue. Jim yanked his head back and to the left, hitting it on the glass on the driver’s side and said, “What in the fuck are you doing?”

“I was saying thank you for the nice dinner. Nothing more, nothing less,” Carson answered as he opened up the door to get out. “See you in the morning, Jim.”

Jim watched him walk into the parking garage and felt like he was somewhere in the Twilight Zone. What the fuck was that all about. That was not a thank you for dinner. That was a fucking kiss. And with tongue. Jim knew he was going to have to talk to Blair about this, so he hoped that Blair would still be up when he got there. 

!!!!!!!!!!

When Jim got home, there were no lights on and he could hear Blair snoring his little snore, meaning Blair was sound asleep. Jim really needed to talk to him. 

Jim got into the shower and when he was done he put a pair of boxers on and brushed his teeth, three times. When he came out of their bathroom Blair was sitting there watching him as he walked to the bed. 

“What’s with the shower, man?”

“I had to wash Carson off of me. He fucking touched me tonight,” Jim whispered. 

“What do you mean he touched you?” Blair asked suddenly wide awake. 

“He leaned across me and kissed me with tongue. I pulled my head away so fast that I hit it on the glass on the side of the SUV. It hurts like hell. I brushed my teeth three times to get his taste out. I didn’t like it, Chief, so don’t even think you have to do anything about it. I’m telling Simon tomorrow that I want the case, Carson can go fuck himself,” Jim explained. 

“Jim, you can’t just quit the case with him. You’ll have to work with him, but make sure he knows the boundaries,” Blair said as casually as he could. 

“Why aren’t you mad?” Jim asked, sounding rather hurt by it all. 

“I’m so pissed off, that I want to fucking shoot him tomorrow, but the case comes first. We can’t have another family killed just because of this. It’s time to get down to business. Did you figure anything out?” Blair said. 

“Yeah, I have some major leads tomorrow. It’s going to take all day to find everything out, but it’ll be good I think. I wish you were working with me. At least I wouldn’t have freaked out if you kissed me. I sure could use a kiss now,” Jim said sounding somewhat needy. 

Blair shoved him on to the bed, rushed over and shut and locked the bedroom door and said, “I’ll going to show you who you belong to.”

“Now you’re fucking talking,” Jim growled. 

Blair made mad passionate love to Jim and didn’t let Jim come until he wanted him to. He was in total control. This man wasn’t going to get to have Jim in any way and that’s all there was to it. Blair was a little bit fierce in his love making, which made it more exciting for Jim. He wouldn’t have said that to Blair, but he loved when Blair took over the bedroom. He loved when Blair was the boss. 

Blair cleaned Jim off and kissed him sweetly and said, “Did I hurt you?”

“Oh no, babe, you didn’t hurt me. Or should I say, you hurt me good?” Jim teased. 

“I’m serious, Jim. I don’t ever want to hurt you in any way,” Blair pleaded.

Jim said, “I’m going to be sore tomorrow, but that’s all right. I can live with that. I loved how you loved me. Thanks. I needed that.”

They kissed for awhile and then wrapped in each others arms until Blair fell asleep. Jim stayed awake for a little while, feeling the pain that Blair had inflicted on him. It was a good pain though. Blair loved him, of this he was certain. Jim got up to open the door and then got back into bed. 

Blair said, “I did hurt you. You’re walking funny. God, I’m sorry.”

“Babe, I’m fine. You needed to mark your territory and that’s good with me,” Jim admitted. 

“I didn’t make you bleed?” Blair asked a little scared for a second. 

“No, I’m fine, I’m just a little out of practice. I haven’t bottomed in a while. You know that. So stop worrying. Let’s go to sleep,” Jim pulled Blair into his arms and they both fell asleep. 

!!!!!!!!!!

The next morning, Blair made a wonderful breakfast up for Jim and Jim knew he was feeling guilty about fucking him raw last night. Jim liked the feeling and sure wasn’t going to complain about it. Now if he could just get Blair to see the light, he’d have it made. 

Hannah came walking into the bedroom and Jim said, “What do you need Hannah?”

“I need you. Poppa said that it’s time for breakfast. He made pancakes and he wants you to have enough time to eat,” Hannah said taking Jim’s hand in hers and leading him into the kitchen. 

Blair blushed when he saw Jim walk into the room and Jim thought it was one of the cutest things he had seen in his life. He kissed Blair and whispered, “I’m fine. I love you.”

Blair said, “Sit down, I made you a good breakfast in case you have to work late again. Sit, sit, sit.”

Jim laughed and sat down and let Blair wait on him, he secretly loved when Blair did that. 

“Do you mind if I tell Carson something this morning?” Blair asked. 

“Nope, don’t mind in the least. It’s your call, babe,” Jim said happily eating his pancakes. 

“Okay, then. I’m going to talk to him and let him know I mean business,” Blair said as he sat down to feed Jesse. 

Jesse said, “Poppa, poppa, poppa and clapped his hands. Blair lit up with a happy smile and said, “Did you hear him?”

Jim laughed and said, “Yeah, I think that out of everyone, I of all people heard him, Blair.”

Hannah smiled and said, “He’ll say daddy next, you wait and see.”

“Daddy, daddy, daddy,” Jesse said happily, still clapping his little hands together. 

“I’m officially thrilled to death. This is the best day ever,” Blair said. 

“I agree. Jesse, you made poppa and daddy very happy today. Thank you.”

“Do I make you happy too, daddy?” Hannah asked sweetly. 

“Of course you make us happy. You’re the best,” Jim said as he swooped in for a quick kiss from Hannah. 

They finished their breakfast and got the kids dropped off at day care and drove to work. They took Blair’s SUV this time, so that Jim had an excuse for not working late. He had to go when his ride did. 

!!!!!!!!!!

“Do you suppose Jim got home late last night?” Meyers asked Harper while Harper made breakfast for everyone. 

“I don’t know. You could call and ask him though,” Harper suggested. 

“Hell, they’re on their way into work. You know they go an hour earlier then we do. I hate to bother them when they’re driving,” Meyers replied. 

“Call him later. He’ll be glad to tell you all about it, I’m sure,” Harper answered. 

“Okay, I’ll call him as soon as I get to my station,” Meyers said sweetly. 

They all ate breakfast talking about anything and everything and the guys were thrilled with their happy family. 

!!!!!!!!!!

When Jim arrived at the station he went in and talked to Simon. Jim decided to give him an update of what they had found out. Besides Blair wanted to talk to Carson alone. Jim needed to give him some time. 

Jim sat down carefully when Simon asked him to sit for a cup of coffee. Thankfully Simon had his back turned at the time, so he didn’t notice the grimace on Jim’s face. 

Simon began asking questions and they talked and talked until Jim figured he had given Blair enough time to take care of business. 

He stood up as carefully as he had sat down and said, “Simon, thank you so much for the coffee. I better get this show on the road.”

“Jim, I know you didn’t want to work with him and I’m sorry that I made you, but if you find something out today, that would be a beginning. The FBI is thinking of taking the case over. So wouldn’t it be nice if you solved it before the FBI did?” Simon inquired.

“Shit, I better get busy. Let me know about the FBI, okay?” Jim asked as he went to the door. 

“You’ll be the first one I tell, Jim.”

Jim walked out and saw Harper standing there and said, “Have you seen Blair yet?”

“He’s talking to Carson. I walked back to the break room for some coffee and he’s telling him off. I take it he made a move on you last night?” Harp wanted to know. 

“Yup, he kissed me with tongue and everything. It was gross. He’s gross. But I banged my head on the window trying to get away from him and I still have a fucking headache,” Jim said as quietly as he could. 

“That fucker…Blair’s probably ready to kill him, eh?” Harper asked. 

“Oh yeah, to say the least. I better get in there before he does,” Jim teased, sort of. 

Jim left the bullpen and walked towards the conference room and heard Blair say, “You just remember, you idiot, that if you touch him again I’m going to rip your balls off and shove them down your throat. And I mean that. I have nothing to lose, but Jim. I won’t share him with anyone. Am I understood?”

“You sound like a broken record, Sandburg. Of course Jim is going to tell you that. Did you ever think that maybe he was just trying to cover up my smell? It was his idea, you’re the idiot. You believed him. What a laugh,” Carson said laughing. 

“Laugh all you want, funny man, but remember how your balls are going to taste going down your throat when I shove them there,” Blair turned on his heels and left the room. 

Jim was leaning against the wall smiling with his thumb up. Blair pulled him down quickly for a kiss and said, “Go get him.”

Jim was thrilled. Blair was taking this in stride. It’s not like Blair would really rip off his balls. Or would he? That sent a shiver down Jim’s back and also turned him on at the same time. He walked into the room and said, “You ready for some work?”

“Your partner came in here and told me off this morning. Don’t you think we’re a little old to have our lovers come in and stick up for us? Besides, you wanted it. You didn’t even fight me off. You may as well have been wearing a sign saying you needed me,” Carson explained. 

“You know what? We don’t need your fucking help. Go home. I’m going to ask for help from some real detectives that give a shit about the case, not whether or not they can fuck up someone’s life or not. So go home. That’s an order. I’ll be taking over the case as of now,” Jim shouted as he pulled all of the files and put them together and got the box ready to go out to the bullpen. 

“Don’t be a candy ass, Ellison,” Carson snarled. 

“Don’t you call me names, or I’ll call you one you’re not going to like,” Jim warned. 

“At least I’m not a cock tease, and everyone is going to know that you were,” Carson said hatefully leaning his head back against the wall, trying to take a deep breath, getting control. 

“Say whatever you want as long as it’s on the way out the door. Get lost, you fucking freak.” Jim turned his back and walked out of the room carrying the box full of files. 

He got as far as the bullpen when Carson tried to jump on his back and said, “Fucker.”

Jim knew he was coming, so he dodged him and Carson fell on the floor, with the entire bullpen laughing their ass off. Megan Connor was the happiest of all. She kicked him while he was on the floor. He slugged Connor in the leg and Connor karate kicked him in the balls. 

Simon rushed out of his office when he saw this happening, almost laughing, key words being almost, and said, “Would someone like to tell me what’s going on?”

Harper said, “I would love to tell you.”

“Somebody better say something before I bring Carson up on charges for attacking Connor for no reason,” Simon shouted. 

“What do you mean for no reason? She kicked me. I was defending myself,” Carson answered. 

“Jim, did you see Connor kick him?” Simon asked. 

“No sir, I sure didn’t. But I had my back turned, so you could ask Harper, here. He’s the tallest, he sees more then anyone,” Jim said very sardonically. 

“Harper, did you see her kick him?” Simon inquired, knowing full well that Harper would lie for Connor. 

“No sir. She walked by and he moved as she walked. She might have hit her heel on his leg or something but no, she didn’t kick him,” Harper answered. 

“Are you going to tell me that you believe what Harper says? He’s a liar from way back,” Carson shouted again. 

Connor pulled her dress slack up and said, “Look at this bruise he gave me.”

Everyone looked and Carson knew it was a lost cause. Connor had a huge welt and bruise forming on her leg. Simon ordered Connor to take the rest of the day off and put ice on her leg and he told Carson he was writing him up in a few moments. In the mean time, he told him to get the hell out of his station house. 

Carson got up and limped all the way to the elevator with everyone laughing behind him. 

“Hey Harper, did you want this on video for Meyers to see?” Rafe asked as he held up his phone with a smile on his face. 

“Oh shit, you are an angel, Rafe. Thank you. Meyers was going to be so disgusted that he missed all that, and to think he’ll be able to watch the entire thing on video. This is too cool,” Harper said grabbing Rafe’s phone and downloading it to his own personal lap top. Everyone laughed as they watched him do it. 

Jim cleared his throat and said, “Would anyone here like to help me find a killer?”

“Pick me,” Blair said sweetly. 

“I would love to help, Harper answered. 

Simon said, “Jim, take whomever you need to help you with this case. Let’s get a jump start on it before the feds take it over. It will just make our department look better. I’ve got to go file a report on Carson now, if you’ll all excuse me.”

Everyone started laughing again. They couldn’t help it. 

Jim told everyone what he thought about the security system and they all decided he might be on to something. So Jim, Blair and Harper went to the security system office and asked for the manager. 

The man in charge came out and said, “I’m Mr. Miller, what do you need?”

Jim said, “We need to know if anyone from your company has been fired in the last four weeks? I mean someone that got complaints or something like that. It had to be someone that would have a bone to pick with someone that had one of your systems. We need to look for someone like that. Is this ringing any bells?”

“Four weeks ago, we fired Martin Maiso. He’s been with the company for about ten years, but he was asking weird questions of the teens that lived in two of the houses that we have systems at. So, we fired him. We told him why and told him to find other employment. He was weird. We all called him Marty. Let me get his address and phone number for you. Did he do something?” Mr. Miller asked. 

“If we’re right, he might have killed someone out of revenge,” Jim said softly. 

“Oh God, those killings that have been going on? Are they our systems? I didn’t put two and two together. Here is his number and address. Go and find this man as soon as possible. I’m so sorry we didn’t notice what was happening. No one came and asked us any questions before you,” Miller said. 

“It’s okay, sir. We’ll get on this right away and hopefully get it solved today. Thank you for everything. I need you to have your clients all change their passwords and key codes as soon as possible and only tell you. No one else is allowed to know them for now. Understood?” Jim asked. 

“Understood. We’ll get on it right now. Good luck, officers,” Mr. Miller said as they all left the office. 

!!!!!!!!!!

Jim, Blair and Harper were all ready for taking this man down, in case he was the killer. But they had to remember they didn’t know that yet, it was only a guess. They drove up and got out of the SUV quietly and walked up to the door. Blair knocked on the door with Jim and Harper standing to the side where he wouldn’t be able to see him. The idiot opened the door and all three of them went barreling into the apartment and handcuffed him right away. 

Connor, Rafe, Brown and Joel drove up about ten minutes later with another squad of cars. They all walked in and said, “What does it look like Ellison?”

“We’re waiting for our search warrant. Blair put in the call for it, so it’s going to be another ten minutes at least. So we’re just having a friendly chat with Mr. Maiso here,” Jim said evenly. 

The call came through with the search warrant and everyone began to look through his things. It didn’t take too long to put two and two together. He had little prizes he had kept from each house, that he really shouldn’t have kept. But the biggest mistake he made was having the two guns and the black gloves and the black jacket. He was getting ready for another hit. He had an address and everything. Harper was reading Maiso his rights when the FBI showed up. They told Jim and Blair that they were taking over the case. 

Jim said, “Sure, that makes sense. We caught the guy and you get the glory. Well, it makes no difference to us. At least he’s done killing.”

“We don’t expect to take your glory, Detective Ellison. We just want our man. We’ve been searching for him for some time,” Agent Bennett said. 

“That’s so strange, because I figured it out in one night. What were you guys doing for the last four weeks?” Jim asked. 

Agent Bennett said, “There is no need for name calling.”

Jim looked around shocked and said, “I didn’t call anyone a name.”

“You said we didn’t do our job.” Bennett said. 

“You didn’t. There are five families that are gone because you didn’t do your job. So you have to live with that, not me. This wasn’t even our precinct. We were asked by another one to look into it,” Jim explained. 

Harper said, “Jim, we have everything cataloged and the feds have signed all of our paperwork, so we’re safe to leave now. It’s there baby now.”

“Good work, Harper. That was fast. Thanks,” Jim replied. 

The three men left first and then all the rest of major crime left last. Connor wanted to be sure that everything was signed, sealed and delivered before she left. 

!!!!!!!!!!

“Harp, did you really send that video to Meyers?” Blair asked as Jim drove them back to the station. 

“I sure did. I knew he would love it. He gets a joy out of the littlest things,” Harper teased. 

“Oh Harper, don’t be so hard on yourself, I’m sure that Mey thinks your thing is just fine,” Blair joked. 

“Very funny, Sandburg,” Harper said laughing. 

“Well, two things happened today that have made my day,” Jim confessed. 

“What’s the second thing?” Blair asked. 

“The first thing was you defending my honor from Carson and the second was him getting his balls kicked by Connor. I guess there would be three things, because I loved moving in and taking over the feds spot for a few moments.”

“Hey Jim and Blair, would you like to come for dinner tonight? We’ll all be home for a change,” Harper asked. 

“That would be swell,” Blair answered and then looked over at Jim and said, “Is it okay with you?”

“Whatever you want to do is fine by me. I’m just so glad to have Carson out of our lives, I can’t tell you. He was such a royal pain, I can see why Meyers hated him so badly,” Jim admitted. 

“If we can get the kids all watching a movie tonight, we can watch the Carson show on the lap top in the kitchen. Doesn’t that sound like fun?” Harper asked evilly. 

Blair laughed and said, “That does sound fun. Let’s go and have us a good time, Jim. This is a night to remember.”

“Oh I think we’ll all remember it. That’s for sure. But I think Harper and Meyers might enjoy it more then any of us,” Jim said laughing. 

“Meyers hated having him around. I’m so glad that Simon wrote him up for Connor. He won’t be coming back, that’s for sure. It was nice being rid of him for a few years, but it was a nightmare having him back again. Sorry, I passed him on to you, Jim.”

“Don’t worry about it, Harp. What are we having for dinner tonight?” Jim asked. 

“Let me check,” Harper said as he texted Meyers and waited for a reply. 

“We’re having steaks. Mey is getting off now and going to the store. So we’re having steaks and potatoes for dinner. Sound good?” Harper asked. 

“Sounds excellent. Thanks for inviting us,” Blair said smiling. 

The guys all talked all the way to the station, where they filled out all of the paperwork they needed to do to sign the case over to the feds. Simon was most pleased with his detectives. He couldn’t have been more proud. 

He looked out on the bullpen and saw everyone smiling and chatting and knew it didn’t matter who caught the killer, all the mattered is there wouldn’t be anyone tonight that was killed. At least from that man, anyway. 

The end


	8. Harper and Meyers Collage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THis is what I think Harper and Meyers look like. :)

[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/harpermeyers_zpsb746894f.jpg.html)


End file.
